PWG Is Your Body Ready? 6/15/2013
Written by: TJ Hawke
June 15, 2013
Commentators: Excalibur, Rick Knox, Sami Callihan, Chuck Taylor, & Kevin Steen
The RockNES Monsters (Johnny Yuma & Johnny Goodtime) vs. The Unbreakable Fucking Machines (Michael Elgin & Brian Cage)
The Monsters jumped the Machines before the bell. They then failed to suplex them. The Machines proceeded to give them stereo delayed vertical suplexes that lasted for a minute. The Monsters somehow, despite all logic, managed to get control of the match, and they worked over Cage. The Machines managed to get control of the match after preventing a dive sequence. Elgin killed Goodtime with the twisting senton. The teams went back and forth, tornado style for the rest of the match. It was much more fun than I expected. The match finished with Elgin buckle bombing Yuma into Goodtime, and then giving him an Elgin Bomb: 1…2…3
The dynamic between these two teams worked out really well, and this was an excellent way to start the show. The Monsters are much better off going forward as heels. I lost interest in them a while ago, but there are plenty of fun matches for them now.
Match Rating: ***1/4
Davey Richards vs. Kyle O’Reilly
This match was supposed to happen at World’s Finest, but Davey got a NJPW tour.
They started the match trading lots of submissions. They did some nifty stuff. They caught each other’s legs. They did a great Rock, Paper, Scissors spot to get out of it. Davey then turned heel for the match. That’s PWG. Davey took Kyle’s head off with his soccer punt from the apron. Davey was mostly in control for a while after that, but he was never dominating the match. They traded kicks. Kyle hit a German, but Davey fired back with a double stomp. More kicks. Davey FUCKING MURDERED him with a short range kick to the side of the head: 1…2…NO!!! Davey went for a ghetto stomp, but Kyle awkwardly caught him with a triangle choke. That was labored. Davey escaped, but his shoulder has gotten very damaged throughout the match. Kyle got a great nearfall with a bridging Regaplex. They went to the top rope and hit each other a lot. Davey hit a ghetto stomp for a nearfall, but Davey then immediately transitoned into an ankle lock. Kyle caught him with a knee, an axe kick, and a tornado DDT! Kyle transitioned into a cross armbreaker, and Davey immediately tapped out!!!!
Great fucking match. Kyle was treated like a star by the crowd after the match. These guys managed to do so much innovative stuff in this match. I’ve been annoyed by a lot of matches these guys have been a part of over the last two or three years (especially Davey), but this was not one of those times.
Match Rating: ****
Friends In Similar Tights (Johnny Gargano & Chuck Taylor) vs. Dojo Bros (Roderick Strong & Eddie “Eddie Edwards” Edwards)
This is an awesome matchup.
Chucky was getting chopped a lot. So, he decided to put on his Chikara hoodie. FIST got control of the match for a brief period of time. That ended when Roddy chopped Chucky in the dick. Gargano eventually got cut off, and he was worked over for a while. He, of course, managed to escaped, and Chucky Taylor made a great hot tag. He did a tope con hello and then briefly joined the commentation station (shaped like a table!). Gargano hit a tope suicida on Roddy, and Chucky then got a nearfall with a Lionsault. The teams went back and forth. FIST hit Roddy with the Eating Pussy and Kickin’ Ass: 1…2…NO! Gargano ate a Funplex/Sick Kick combo: 1…2…NO! Eddie killed Chucky with a Ghetto Stomp, and Roddy hit Gargano with the Orange Crush Backbreaker: 1…2…3
I would say that the match ended a few minutes after its peak, which is why I liked the Davey/Kyle match a tiny bit more. However, that is a nitpick; this match was a ton of fun. These are the exact kind of matchups that I want from PWG.
Match Rating: ***3/4
Kevin Steen vs. Drake Younger
Steen was wearing a Generico shirt, and the fans chanted “Ole!” Drake hit his senton plancha early on. They proceeded to brawl on the floor for a while. They ended up back in the ring. Steen jawed with an obnoxious fan while kicking Younger’s ass. Drake finally came back with a nasty half-nelson suplex. Ouch. Steen did a lot of rolling around to avoid Drake. Excalibur made fun of people who do Youtube reviews. Adam Cole ran out and hit Steen with the title. Drake gave Cole a Drake’s Landing. Drake covered Steen: 1…2…NO! Drake went for a Drake’s Landing, but Steen avoided it. Drake caught Steen with a backslide: 1…2…3!
This match was on its way to being the MOTN, but the storyline finish took it down a notch or two. That’s not the end of the world, as PWG rarely does though types of finishes. Cole’s interference leads to a triple threat match between these three men. Great stuff from Steen and Drake.
Match Rating: ***3/4
The Young Bucks (Nick & Matt Jackson) vs. AR Fox & Samuray Del Sol
The Bucks are the PWG tag champs, but this is non-title. Fox and Del Sol lost their only PWG match together before this match. Thus, they don’t deserve a title shot. Logic!
They did lots of fancy stuff early on. Some of it looked smooth. A lot of it looked labored. Eventually, Fox was sent ass first into a turnbuckle, and the Bucks worked him over after that. Nick held Fox on the floor. Matt did some cartwheels in the ring, and he then rolled to the floor to back rake Fox. The Bucks continued to be in control for a while longer. Eventually, Fox escaped and tagged in Del Sol. Del Sol made a comeback with some wacky stuff. Del Sol hit both of them with an Air Jordan. Fox followed that with the Lo Mein Rain. Back in the ring, Del Sol hit a Code Red for a nearfall. Fox and Del Sol then did a great combination of movez. This was the highlight of the match. The teams traded all the movez until they all went down. Holy fuck.
Things slowed down, as Matt and Fox went at it. Fox eventually had Nick pinned with a Lo Mein Pain, but Nick got his foot on the ropes. Del Sol accidentally gave Fox the Rising Sun (lol), and the Bucks then killed Del Sol with a double superkick: 1…2…NO! The Bucks then hit a deadly combo of moves on Del Sol, but he kicked out. Finally, the Bucks gave Del Sol a More Bang For Your Buck: 1…2…3
This match definitely ended after its peak (see where I went to a second paragraph in my recap), but overall, this was a very enjoyable package. The best part of the match was easily from the Lo Mein Rain until the movez sequence where everyone collapsed at the end. The beginning portions of the match involved some creative stuff, but it didn’t all look especially smooth and whatnot. I’m sure most people will love this match, but I thought there were some distinct flaws. Don’t get me wrong though, I enjoyed this a lot.
Match Rating: ***1/2
Adam Cole© vs. Sami Callihan [60 Minute Iron Man match for the PWG World Championship]
Sami hit a tope suicida and was in control for a few minutes. Cole got control for an extended period of time after that. Sami came back. Eventually, Cole caught Sami with a low blow and schoolboy: 1…2…3
Adam Cole 1. Sami Callihan 0.
Sami went for a small package, but Cole reversed: 1…2…3!
Adam Cole 2. Sami Callihan 0.
Cole hit a brainbuster on the knee: 1…2…3
Adam Cole 3. Sami Callihan 0.
Cole celebrated for a while until Sami powerbombed him into a ringpost. Cole got control of the match, and he said he would make Sami suck his dick. Sami grabbed him by the dick and gave him a Dick Bomb. Amazing. Steen and Excalibur discussed how great Steen’s wife was at blowjobs. “If there were trophies for that sort of thing, she would have a lot of them,” – Kevin Steen. PWG is the best. Cole got a figure four, but Sami reversed it. Cole made the ropes. Forty minutes left. Cole then got the figure four on the ringpost. Cole killed him with a wheelbarrow German onto the apron. Cole repeatedly tried to win another fall by countout. The fans helped him beat one of the counts. Sami came back with an exploder on the floor. Sami was in control for a while after that. Sami got a Stretch Muffler, and Cole tapped out!
Adam Cole 3. Sami Callihan 1.
Sami immediately transitioned into a STF, and Cole tapped out!
Adam Cole 3. Sami Callihan 2.
They started trading pinning combinations, and Sami got a pin: 1…2…3!
Adam Cole 3. Sami Callihan 3.
They kept trading pinfalls, and Sami got another one: 1…2…3!!!
Sami Callihan 4. Adam Cole 3.
Cole hit a Rock Bottom. Cole then set up for the People’s Elbow, but Sami avoided it and hit Stone Cold Stunner: 1…2…NO!!!!!!! That was great. Cole came back with a piledriver, but Sami got his foot on the ropes. Cole then gave Sami a Michinoku Driver onto the apron. Cole hit a series of kicks, and he then hit the Florida Key: 1…2…3
Sami Callihan 4. Adam Cole 4.
Sami hit a pair of Air Raid Crashes, but Cole survived. Cole then came back with the Panama Sunrise: 1…2…3!
Adam Cole 5. Sami Callihan 4.
My interest in this match is waning. Cole hit a Rock Bottom and a People’s Elbow. Sami came back with a spinebuster and the People’s Stomp to the Head. With fifteen minutes remaining, Cole locked in the figure four. Sami escaped and hit the Panama Sunrise: 1…2…NO! Sami hit a middle rope DVD and a lariat: 1…2…3!
Adam Cole 5. Sami Callihan 5.
They traded chops. This went on for a while. Sami finally won the battle. Sami then hit a piledriver: 1…2…NO! Kevin Steen, “Adam Cole is a big boy.” Excalibur does that line much better. Sami hit another piledriver, but Cole grabbed the ropes to prevent the pinfall. Seven minutes remaining. Cole hit a Canadian Destroyer: 1…2…NO! Cole hit the Florida Key: 1…2…no. Cole then hit a piledriver: 1…2…no. Five minutes. These five minutes will make or break this match for me. Sami hit a Tower of London: 1…2…no. Sami hit a spear. @typicalROHfan probably likes this match now. That got a nearfall. Three minutes left. Sami hit the Kobashi chops. Sami avoided the Panama Sunrise and hit a Jig ‘n’ Tonic. Cole reversed that pinfall into a sunset flip: 1…2…3!
Adam Cole 6. Sami Callihan 5.
Cole started running away from the ring. Sami chased after him. Two minutes left. Cole tripped when he got back in the ring. Sami went for the Stretch Muffler. One minute left. Sami finally locked in the Muffler fully. Sami repeatedly kicked him in the head. Thirty seconds. Sami transitioned into a Calgary Crab. Cole survived though, and the time limit ran out.
The fans chanted “Thank You Sami!” Cole seemingly broke character to thank him, too. They hugged. Cole thankfully kicked him in the balls and then kicked him repreatedly. Kevin Steen ran in for the save. A lot of the roster came out to thank Sami. Steen put Sami over HUGE. He then told Sami to say hi to Generico for us.
When it became obvious that Sami was leaving for the WWE after June, we all knew this would be his last match in PWG (unless he chokes Tony Chimel with a tie or something). Considering there were a lot Sami matches that PWG never did (Roddy, Eddie, and a proper match with Steen), I was quite disappointed that they booked him against Adam Cole. Why? Sami and Adam Cole have seemingly had millions of matches together, and they just didn’t need to have another one with each other. On top of that, I’m generally not a fan of Iron Man matches (especially sixty minute Iron Man matches).
That transitions to my biggest problem with the match. This match did not have sixty minutes of story. While I appreciate the effort (and general level of talent) it takes to pull off a sixty minute match, I just don’t want to watch sixty minute matches that have no reason for being sixty minutes. The last twenty or thirty minutes of the match did not really add anything to proceedings, and the crowd pretty much cooled off during that period as well. This was a great effort, but it was not for me.
Match Rating: **3/4
One of the things that I love about PWG is that their shows have so much variety in them. For example, even though all three tag matches had the same basic structure (babyfaces dominate early, heels do heat segment, and then the teams trade lots of movez until the finish), they all felt unique because of the characters executing them. The three singles matches were equally unique, and the show in general feels like it will have something for everyone. With that in the mind, the first five matches made for a great show, but the main event was a noticeable step down from the rest of the card. Fortunately, there was so much entertainment during the first five matches that this show is still an easy recommendation despite my feelings about the main event. Also, I bet a lot of you will enjoy the main event a hell of a lot more than I did.