WCW Nitro 12/27/1999
Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
Good God. The angle is already shot. I will say Thunder did have its entertaining moments and it advanced the nWo crap. However, Goldberg breaking a window with his bare arm is the epitome of idiocy. I get it, he was in the moment and he lost the pipe. But you do not need to break glass. The beginning of the end of the nWo 2000 and Russo and another change in WCW. I liked that part of the angle. Goldberg was interesting and would have chased after the nWo for a couple of months before hopefully winning the title. But he nearly lost his arm instead. I am surprised that they did not bring him back but then again Russo will be gone. Bret will be done for soon too. Ratings started strong with a 3.7 but then fell to the lower 2’s and finished with a 2.9 and RAW stayed the same with a 5.9.
Bill Busch has had enough of Russo and Ferrara and Hall who has not shown up tonight had better or there will be consequences. Tony sells it that Hall was injured by Goldberg.
We get an update on Goldberg who had surgery as he tore a tendon and had forty stitches. Jesus. What a shame. They start getting something rolling for better or worse and it collapses! Poor WCW. I won’t reminisce and wish it was still around but Goddamn do I…..
Match 1: Brian Knobs v. Bam Bam Bigelow
Kanyon is at the announce table and distracts Bigelow and Knobs blasts him with a garbage can over the head over and over and then shoves him into the post. Bigelow fights back and decks Kanyon too. They fight out in the crowd. You can barely see them as they brawl all over the place. Bigelow slams him. Bell rings I think Kanyon helped Knobbs win.
** Shitty camera work.
Sid arrives with Benoit. A monster truck is in the background.
nWo is giving JJ Dillon the business. They give up the tag titles and then beat up JJ. I believe Hall was in no condition to be here tonight. Fuck me.
The Monster Truck is nWo.
Steiner has arrived and the picture is snowy and they blame the nWo…It is fixed. Jesus. Rick helps him in a wheelchair and wheels him into the building.
nWo are rampaging in the back, upending the shitty catering stand.
Match 2: Shane v. Tank Abbot
This is an ass kicking. Already over. Shane is out cold.
Steiner is being wheeled and he will announce his retirement. Clearly a swerve.
After the break a video package of the career of Steiner. Here he comes with his brother. He has a cane and looks sad and gimpy. He has done this so many damn times the past year and a half. He is choking up as discusses his back. He weeps and hopes the fans say a prayer for him. Cue the nWo! Bret has the mic and asks for a hand for Steiner. Everyone is boo hooing and then tells him to get his ass out of the ring as there is no room for a washed up nobody. Bret tells him also that he was not very good and he needs to get out of the ring before he gets hurt, seriously. Nash tosses his wheelchair and Bret tells him to keep on rolling. Major heat and Bret soaks it up. He understands emotions and how great Scotty was but whatever and then points to his belt. JJ acts choked up and then blasts a producer with his guitar when he is told to go to break….
They are still in the ring. Nash has the mic. He makes fun of Billy Busch and assures us that Scott will be here. JJ has the crowds survey right here and gets on the ropes and mugs. Nash cracks Texas jokes. They all make fun of Goldberg and Sid will also be destroyed. Bret will kick his ass at the PPV. I though Benoit was getting that shot…oh well. Now to the Chosen One as he calls himself. A spraypainted Caddy drives into the arena and Sid gets out with a ball bat and as does Benoit and Nash stands around and gets blasted. Hennig attacks Sid and Benoit and is knocked out. Hennig is tossed on top of the car.
Hennig is carted off in an ambulance.
Match 3: Booker T v. Lash Leroux
Fuck. Midnight. Wait it is Harlem Heat v. Lash and Midnight. This was a cluster. Ray basically turns on Booker and Lash wins and they advance in the Tourney.
* This angle sucks.
Bret is walking in the back and Chavo comes out and calls to him but he is taken out by a masked dude.
Revolution has a vignette being in DC. Not very good I might ad. Making fun of America.
They show Power Plant members in the front row.
Match 4: Bret Hart (c) v. Jerry Flynn for WCW Title
Why is Bret first? They go at it. Flynn gets in some offense and hammers him on the floor and back in the ring unloads some rapid fire kicks but Bret fires back and DDT’s him. Flynn mounts a comeback but JJ wallops him with a bat and it is Sharpshooter time.
** I know they are heels but give him a clean win.
Flynn gets pummeled over and over with the ball bats from the nWo. Spraypaint time. They leave and walk by Tank who glares. He heads to the ring and pulls up Flynn and drops him with one punch. Flynn is dead!
Shane Douglas is going off about how terrible America is. How they have killed Native Americans and started wars. Saturn talks about the Grinch and how he stole Christmas!
Nash is on the phone with Hall. He tells him to hurry up to get here.
Match 5: PG-13 v. Rick Steiner and Berlyn
Oh, I forgot, this is a Lethal Lottery and it is supposed to be a random drawing for tag teams. That is why Midnight was with Lash. But PG are together. They are wearing Titans jerseys in Houston and making fun of Houston is a decent rap!
Berlyn is destroying a PG dude. He is tossing him around with ease. Rick gets the tag and he just unloads. He runs one upside down into the corner. Wolfy D is run into the corner too. Berlyn has left. Rick is not phased as he destroys them and flips them into the corner. One is placed up top and tossed off with a belly to belly. It is over.
** Nice squash.
Rick tosses the other guy from the top rope. The decision is refused.
Saturn is talking to Duggan who is his partner tonight. He thinks they can work together.
Revolution is in front of the White House. Now he is making fun of Bill Clinton for being impeached. Saturn grabs a guy in a Clinton Mask and talks to him.
Match 6: Saturn and Jim Duggan v. Norman Smiley and Asya
Norman spin slams Saturn and does the Wiggle. Now Saturn takes it to him. He slams Norman and drops the big elbow. He sells his elbow being hurt. Asya gets the tag. Saturn picks her up and then puts her down. He wants her to tag Norman and she blasts him from behind and then superplexes him. Duggan runs in and wipes out Saturn and Norman wins!
*1/2 Overbooked. Duggan celebrates.
Kidman is walking in the back as he faces JJ tonight who is walking in the back too. Awesome, I love watching people walk in the back!
Match 7: Kidman v. Jeff Jarrett (c) for WCW US Title
JJ hammers him in the corner and Kidman fights back but is taken down. JJ poses for the crowd and then whips Kidman into the ropes but is dropkicked. Kidman tries again but misses and is catapulted over the top rope. Here comes the nWo. Kidman is game still, and he fends them off but JJ runs him over and gets two. Kidman is put in a sleeper and is out and counters with one of his own. JJ escapes but is powerbombed and nearly pinned. He goes up top, Kidman does, and hits the flying crossbody and gets two. They go at it and he is tossed over the top rope, Nash had intervened. Here comes the rest of the FA and the fight is on as they assault JJ and then Bret. Nash comes in and uses the ball bat. Kidman rolls up JJ and gets two. Kidman goes up but Nash crotches him and JJ is able to pull off the win.
**1/2 Overbooked but still solid.
FA were game but now they are getting annihilated after the match. Nash goes after Rey’s knee. So much for the return of the FA. Jesus.
Gene calls out Lex and Liz who come out to Sting’s music! Lex is dressed as him too. Luger runs around the ring and bellows like Sting too. He is acting like him as he brags about how great the Total Package is and how he got his ass kicked. The lights go off and thunder rumbles like it would be Sting but it is not….
Nash tells Hall where the Astrodome is on the phone and makse him promise that he will be there.
Match 8: Fit Finlay v. Meng
Meng attacks him. Here comes the Harris Boys. I guess this is a tag match for the Lethal Lottery. I hate this shit. It is so damn rigged and everyone knows it. Just have normal teams…..They attack both men. Fit and Meng start wailing on each other again and brawl on the floor and are counted out.
*1/2 Angle advancement as those two will clearly fight it out at the PPV….I think.
They are still fighting on the floor.
Lights go out and Harris Boys are laid out…..
David and Daffney stroking each other.
Tony Marinara is talking to his boss and the Mamalukes bring in Disco. Really I did not pay attention. Sorry.
Match 9: Disco and Big Vito v. Kanyon and Buff
Kanyon leaves and Buff takes out both Vito and Disco and now hammers Disco. Disco escapes and tags in Vito who pounds on Buff. Disco gets the tag and powerslams Buff and gets two. Buff ducks a blow and then Disco lowers his head and eats a swinging neckbreaker. Vito accidentally hits Disco and the Blockbuster finishes off Vito.
*1/2 Okay….I guess.
Nash is walking solo in the back with a ball bat. No Hall yet.
Match 10: Kevin Nash v. Wall and Sid Vicious
nWo comes out sans Hall. Nash admits no Hall and would like a moment….Here comes the Wall who is his partner. I believe. Nope, I am wrong he is Sid’s partner.
Jesus WCW, nice way to tease the return of a drunk. Oh and he comes back again….before finally leaving for good in a month or so.
Wall stomps a hole in Nash. Wall works him in the corner and drops him with a big boot. Nash reverses the whip. Bret whacks Wall with a bat to the back. Sid gets in the ring and is upset and so finally heads to the floor and chases off JJ who was beating the Wall and Bret Hart decks him too. Sid is in and he mauls Nash. But JJ distracts him and Nash takes out the Wall.
*1/2 A cluster.
Sid is doubleteamed. Here comes Benoit. Now Sid takes out JJ. Steiner hobbles down. Swerve time. JJ is chokeslammed. Scotty is in the ring with a bat and Sid allows himself to be hit essentially. Jesus. Steiner takes out Benoit too and he is a member of the nWo. It is so obvious. Tony screams that this is the biggest swerve of them all. Fucking Christ Shitvone…..Scott was here but not Hall. Ha, ha…Pamphlets fall from the ceiling.
They put Sid in the Caddy as Nash lays on it. JJ drives it off. They are in the back of the dome and get out of the car and make sure Sid is out. Bret is in the Monster Truck and he runs over the car….
* Talk about a clusterfuck of epic proportions. Sadly, the crowd was not very big either. Maybe 10000 tops in a dome. No wrestling and no Goldberg really kills the angle. No Hall. Scott Steiner in an obvious swerve. Sid being crushed but still alive….I am guessing! The nWo is just played out. The initial, okay this may work out, has come and gone. They kick everyone’s ass and it buries other talent. The FA come back and get buried but at least Kidman had a good match. The nWo having newer members is a good thing and I have been impressed with JJ. Bret is great as a heel, but damn it the angle is old and needs to be killed off. It is repeat of everything that we have seen before. Goldberg out could work because WCW would be desperate. Bring back Sting maybe and then Goldberg to finish them off, or Hogan….But, been there done that. I may be underrating the show but I have overrated a lot too. Kill the nWo 2000 angle ASAP and build up other stars that occurred in Oct and Nov. But instead we get shitty rehashes and now a slew of injuries and suspensions are occurring and that led to a shitty Lethal Lottery that did nothing but have a short, overbooked matches. Good Lord I feel dirty after watching that show. At least Bret was solid. Oh, and if Schiavone screams about this being the ultimate swerve one more fucking time…..Please fire him. Now.