WWF Smackdown 12/9/1999
Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
Match 1: Road Dogg v. Chris Jericho
Jericho calls Road Dogg an effiminate loser, and “Thumbs the word.” Here comes Chyna. Jericho is not happy to see her and she heads to the announce table.
Jericho starts strong, and he kicks Road Dogg and then flies into him. After hotshotting him off the top rope he knocks him to the floor. Dogg tries to fight back but is suplexed. Back in the ring, Jericho delays and then goes over to Chyna and jaws with her. The delay helps Road Dogg but only briefly as he is bulldogged and after a Lionsault he gets the win even though Road Dogg had his foot on the rope. Chyna explains it to the ref and of course this is a time that the ref listens. Road Dogg rolls up Jericho for two. Jericho stomps on him but he is nailed with the pump handle slam and though Jericho has his foot on the ropes Road Dogg gets the win. Chyna right at three shoved his foot off the rope.
**1/2 Decent start to the show.
Vince is talking about the contract being signed tonight. Test shows up.
After the break, Test talks to her in his monotone voice. It has been hard for everyone and the engagement needs to be called off. Terrible. Steph is pouting and I mean this is Springeresque in its atrociousness. “I still care about you Stephanie.” Wow! “I will always care about you” and they are about to kiss and Pac interrupts an challenges him to get himself some.
Match 2: Kurt Angle and Steve Blackman v. Dudley Boyz
If the fans follow his program they could accomplish anything, even a World Series….(In Boston, fans boo the shit out of that!).
Devon gets on his hand and knees and wants to wrestle. Angle ties him up and then does the same but Devon kicks him. Angle retaliates with a release over the head suplex. Blackman and Devon are in the ring and Blackman kicks away. Angle is in and he is backdropped and Devon connects with a flying headbutt to the nuts. Devon gets two. Here comes Bubba who gut punches Angle and smacks his chest. Bubba hammers him and slams him. He….Well he was going off the ropes and some just randomly cut out. It went to Angle giving Blackman an Angle Slam and leaving. Oh well….
** Not bad from what I saw.
Too Cool are fist pumping at a club.
Match 3: Christian v. Bulldog (c) for WWF European Title
Christian and Bulldog tussle, exchanging holds but Bulldog press slams him and then clotheslines him. Bulldog vertically suplexes him but Christian unloads on him and gets a couple of near falls. Now a reverse DDT but the Posse swarm and the match is tossed.
D’Lo and Val run down and the Posse are at the receiving end of an ass kicking.
Kevin Kelly keeps asking Kitty what she is going to wear at the PPV. He is not taking her seriously, so she attacks him trying to take off his clothes.
Too Cool is dancing.
Match 4: Big Bossman and Prince Albert v. Hardy Boyz
After a minute or so the Big Show comes down and dismantles Bossman. Bossman runs as Show rambles after him. They get in the car and flee.
Match 5: Mankind v. Al Snow
Nothing but brawling inside and out of the ring for the first couple of minutes. Mankind is thrust into the barrier and now Al is, as well as the steel steps and he is rolled back into the ring. Mankind is slow to follow up as he is worried about Al. Al lures him in and hammers him. But Mankind counters and sticks him to the floor. He goes after him but is backdropped over the table and pounded over and over. Al uses cords to choke him out and then stomps a hole in him. Back in the ring Mankind mounts a comeback and shoots him into the ropes and plants him with a DDT. He pulls out Socko. He takes it off and grabs a steel chair and straddles Al who is begging for mercy and the hesitation is costly as Al kicks him in the nuts. Mankind is belted with the chair and then his head is rammed into it over and over. Mankind is dead. Al stomps him a couple more tmes for good measure.
*** Fun brawl. It was a DQ, obviously…..
The McMahons are having a family meeting.
They are in the ring after the break. Contract signing. I have a feeling a three minute segment will be dragged out to near ten minutes. So far I am correct as HHH is taking his sweet fucking time talking about stipulations. If HHH wins he gets a shot at the title. He continues about kicking Vince’s ass and this being a momentous occasion. On and on….Still going as HHH brags about pulling of the heist of the century by marrying Steph. Oh he is still at the top of the ramp and now starts down. Nope, he stops as he remembers the restraining order, which by the way is just fucking lame. But I guess it goes with HHH’s headgames. Vince calls him a coward. Yup, headgames as he wants Stephanie to come get the papers and a smooch. She gives HHH a fart face look. Shane comes up instead. HHH has not signed the papers and he wants Vince to sign first. He does so and now Shane brings it to HHH who signs it and then pops Shane and Shane stumbles after him and DX is lying in wait and attacks him. Shane is tossed off the stage.
He is getting checked out after the break.
Match 6: X Pac v. Test
Test attacks and after a backdrop Pac retreats to the floor. Test goes out after him and is flung into the steps and he is still down. Back in the ring Test is caught in a chinlock and then kicked into the corner. Pac’s Buster fails as he leaps into a boot. Now Test goes off and hammers away. He sideslams him and pounds him in the corner. Pac nuts him and then finishes him with the X Factor.
** Steph would be married to a puss!
Too Cool and Rikishi are still thugging at the club. First Sexay and after the break Rikishi is dancing but doing his same dance that he does in the ring. He takes off his clothes. Holly comes in and attacks him.
Rock is walking.
After the break he does his thing and gives a shout to Nomar Garciaparra.
Match 7: Rock v. Mr. Ass
He included Nomar and the Green Monster and a ball bat going up Ass’s ass! I forget how over the Rock is. Damn, probably the most in all of wrestling. Ass comes out and takes it to the Rock. He knocks him to the floor and drops him throat first onto the barrier. Back in the ring the slugs away. Rock bobs and weaves off the whip and catches Ass with a Samoan Drop. Rock is thrown into the ref who is down. Famouser on the Rock but the ref is struggling. Ass gets two. Rock is up and nails him with a spinebuster and it is Elbow time. Over.
** Too quick. Outlaws will win at the PPV.
Linda is with the Stooges. Vince is fired up and she wants them to look for him.
HHH is walking….
Match 8: HHH v. Kane
HHH tosses Earl Hebner to the floor! Now Kane comes out. Tori and Kane did a Fabio photo for a romance novel. He does his thing with the fire as she clutches him and throws back her head. Holy fucking shit.
Ref in a Vince mask comes down and is decked and another comes out. Kane is on the offensive. HHH counters with a facebuster but Kane drops him only to miss the elbow. Now HHH beats up the ref again. Kane gives him the big boot as another Vince mask ref comes down. Top rope lariat. Kane lowers his head and eats a DDT. This ref is moving really slow. HHH goes up and leaps into a chokeslam! HHH is able to roll to the floor. The three refs are walking towards a backing away HHH. He turns and another one with a suit hits HHH with a pipe and now the rest of DX gets it too. Linda and crew have come out and he finally leaves.
**** This was a solid go home show. Covered most of the bases and prepped what could be a good PPV. Show should not be champ as they have booked him terribly. Jericho and Angle should win. HHH and Kane should win as should the Outlaws. Bulldog as been misused the last month and will not be champ after the PPV.