WWF Superstars 6/22/1991
Written by: Tom Hopkins
We’re still in Tucson, Arizona (I guess this is week 2 of their one-month cycle) and Vince doesn’t have any special events this week. Instead he brings us Mexican food and introduces us to Nacho Man (who gives us a history lesson at the OK Coral) in a ridiculously scripted opening segment.
-Jake Roberts vs. Mark Ming-
We hear from Andre the Giant, we hear about a potential wedding involving Macho Man and guess what? There’s a match going on right now! The short-arm clothesline sets up the DDT and this is over at 1:26. Ming gets the snake treatment after the match.
We get our first Summerslam promo on Superstars. The event is two months away, after all. Remember when there weren’t monthly WWE PPV’s and you could actually hype an event two+ months in advance?
We head to the Update Center with Mean Gene, and we look at the events of last week and Tugboat turning on the Bushwhackers. We hear from Tugboat, who has now become Typhoon. He’s teamed with Earthquake to become the Natural Disasters.
-The Beverly Brothers vs. Bobby Jones & Terry Diller-
The Beverly’s have Coach as their manager and they are wearing ridiculous capes. The Beverly’s are Beau and Blake for those wondering. So basically I don’t know who’s in the ring, since I never care which Beverly was which, and I don’t care which jobber is which. This is your usual squash match. The Beverly’s didn’t really do anything to differentiate themselves from any other tag team in the WWE and their debut was unimpressive. They finish with a 3D type move at 2:35.
Speaking of shitty tag teams, it’s the Bushwhackers! We hear from them at the Event Center with Sean Mooney. We also hear from Ted DiBiase (hyping his match with Virgil) before we get a Sid Vicious vignette.
-British Bulldog vs. Bill Lucas-
Bulldog overpowers Lucas as Vince, Macho and Roddy continue talking about proposals. Bulldog finishes with the running powerslam at 2:26.
Let’s go back to Mooney. We hear from Mr. Fuji and Bezerker (who says that master pays him to inflict a lot of pain). We also hear from Bret Hart who will go through the WWE.
-IRS vs. Jim Colher-
IRS complains about the tax cheats in the crowd, including Roddy Piper. IRS has stopped wearing the tights and is just wearing regular slacks now, a look that he would retain the rest of his WWE career. IRS hits the write-off quickly before dumping Colher to the outside. A Samoan drop ends this at 1:34.
It’s Funeral Parlor time and our guest this week is the Big Boss Man. Boss Man calls out the Mountie
-Greg Valentine & Billy Gatlin-
It’s not often you get a Hammer match on here. Now we see why. Gatling actually chops away at Valentine early on until Hammer fights back. Valentine turns the tide with a gut buster. Gatlin works a headlock and so Valentine does a knee-crusher before putting the on the figure-four. Gatlin tapes out at 2:24 to end this.
We hear from some WWE Superstars about Sid Justice, including Mr. Perfect and Hacksaw Jim Duggan.
-Undertaker vs. Scott Baszo-
This is still the period of Undertaker’s career when people were in shock of him, and didn’t know how to react. Undertaker must’ve wanted a quick night, since a flying clothesline leads way to a Tombstone that ends this at 1:28. Baszo gets the bodybag treatment.
Let’s head to Sean one more time. We hear from the Texas Tornado as well as Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan.
We give a preview for next week, with Sgt. Slaughter joining us at the Funeral Parlor and the Debut of the Natural Disasters.
-The Bottom Line-
This was an episode that was neither terrible nor good. I guess it was rather forgettable. There’s really no need to watch this one.