PWG Kee_ The _ee Out of Our _ool! 3/27/2004

Written By: Matt Peddycord

March 27, 2004
Santa Ana, CA

Your hosts are Excalibur and Disco Machine!

Adam Pearce, Colt Cabana and Valentina are in the ring. It’s the PWG equivalent to the DX’s Nation parody – except funnier. Did you know Babi Slymm went to the Sanford & Son School of Wrestling? The bottom line is that tonight, “Classic” Colt Cabana is going to make the King of Bling Bling his Rodney King. OHHHHH SNAP!

Disco Machine vs. Charles Mercury

The SBS/Rev Pro wars continue! Mercury starts mocking Disco with obvious disco dancing and gets called a gay. On the floor, Disco avoids a baseball slide on the apron and flips back in the ring only to climb back out and leap from the apron onto Mercury with a cannonball splash. Back in, Mercury ducks a clothesline and applies a bow and arrow. More work on the back with a belly-to-belly suplex which gets two. Mercury gets a little cocky and starts dancing again only to get met with an enziguri! Disco wins a slap battle and hits a snap powerslam for two. Mercury fights back though and blocks a CHOKEBREAKER to give Disco an Angle Slam of sorts. Disco crotches Mercury on the top rope and brings him down with a super DDT (!!). He gets the CHOKEBREAKER finally for the three-count. (8:45) Not bad. The back work was a little dull at times, but it picked up towards the end. **¼

Puma vs. Ricky Reyes

Both men jocking for position to start. They miss some leg lariats and then trade anklelocks, which is pretty cool to see. Reyes kicks Puma around and delivers a double-arm suplex for two. Reye gets a deep half crab on Puma. Once Puma gets to the ropes, he goes for the mask! I mean, how could we possibly know who is behind the mask of Puma?! It’s Pinoy Boy and TJ Perkins! Anyways, Puma gets fired up and hits a slingshot DDT on Reyes on the apron. He follows up by sliding through the ropes and catching Reyes with a hurracanrana. Back in, Reyes catches Puma with a running clothesline. Reyes counters a headscissors from the apron with a side slam for two. Puma catches Reyes with a series of kicks for two. Lots of tombstone piledriver counters leads to Puma ending up on the apron and firing back with a Phoenix DDT! Cover, 1-2-NO! Reyes comes back with a reverse neckbreaker and a Fisherman’s Buster for two. Now he hits two more Fisherman’s Busters for 1-2-NO! Puma comes out of nowhere with a German suplex and then holds on to finish Reyes off with a Tiger Suplex. (11:19) Nice little back and forth match. ***¼

American Dragon & Samoa Joe vs. The Ballard Brothers

Danielson hooks up with Shannon Ballard and backs him into the ropes. “I’ve got until the count of five!” From then on, Dragon stretches Shannon on the mat like he needs to be stretched. Joe gets a tag and in comes Shane. He gets in a few hits on Joe, but then Joe kills him dead with a forearm shiver. Shannon tags, but Joe goes for a kick and Shane gets another tag by his brother. In comes Dragon. He starts bending Shane’s arm the absolute wrong way. When Shane reaches the ropes, Danielson reminds the ref of the five-count. Joe tags and headbutts the crap out of Shane’s wrist. Tag to Dragon, he’s backed into the Ballard corner for a double beatdown. Now Dragon plays *your* face-in-peril as the Ballards get in some offense. Dragon tries to stop Shane with a airplane spin out of a chinlock, but Danielson goes back down to the mat anyway with the chinlock still in tact. The Ballard brothers apply their Boston crab/camel clutch submission while the ref is with Joe. Dragon fights off Shannon with an enziguri and hot tags Joe. He knocks Shane off the apron and gives Shannon a powerbomb into the STF. Dragon tags back in, but takes a double-team face plant. Joe tries to break up the pin with a knee drop when one of the Ballard moves out of the way and Danielson gets nailed with the knee drop. Danielson gets riled up and throws Shane out over the top rope, shoves Joe back on the apron with a WTF m8?, and gives Shannon a superplex for 1-2-NO! Danielson grabs an ab stretch and asks for an extra hand from Joe. When Joe doesn’t let go of Danielson’s hand when the ref catches them cheating, he calls for the bell and the Ballards pick up another win. (12:23) Afterwards, Danielson leaves Joe for dead for the Ballard Brothers. Decent enough with the finish making plenty of sense and furthering the Joe/Danielson rivalry in PWG while also keeping the Ballard/Joe feud hot. **¾

TARO takes over for Excalibur on commentary for the rest of the show.

Colt Cabana (w/Adam Pearce & Valentina) vs. Babi Slymm

It starts out like an old school comedy match with both guys playing games over a knucklelock. Pearce in his gangsta gear gets involved once they go to the floor and stomps a mudhole in Slymm. That gets him sent to the back. Slymm and Cabana fight through the “crowd” of people. Oh man! It’s breaking down in the Elks Lodge. Slymm beats Cabana with a pizza box. That brings up a cotton candy reference from Uncensored 1995. In the ring, Slymm beats Cabana up some more as he begs off. He yanks Slymm off into the corner and takes over with knee drops and forearms. Slymm applies a straight jacket down on the mat. Cabana reaches the ropes and catches Slymm with a swinging neckbreaker for another two. Cabana hits one Double Knee Strike in the corner, but gets launched into the corner on the second try. Birdman clothesline puts Cabana on the floor. From the middle rope, Cabana eats a superkick on the way down for 1-2-NO! Cobra clutch to Cabana! Now Adam Pearce is back at ringside. With Slymm distracted, Valentina slips Cabana some bling. He plays Eddie Guerrero with it while Valentina yells to the ref that Slymm hit him in the face with the necklace. Now that Valentina has the ref distracted, Pearce jumps in and wallops Slymm with some bling on the realz. Cabana covers with his feet on the ropes for 1-2-3. (12:29) Other than he’s black and easy comedy, I don’t know what they see in Babi Slymm. **

PWG Champion Adam Pearce (w/Valentina) vs. Bobby Quance

Pearce works the Larry Zbyszko stall routine to start. That eats up a couple minutes. Once they hook it up, Quance stays adamant with an armdrag into an armbar. Yes, the Ricky Steamboat strategy is good. Valentina has to trip up poor Bobby for Pearce to take control of the action with a Double A spinebuster. They brawl to the floor where Valentina gets put in Quance’s path. Don’t worry – she doesn’t get hit. Pearce goes to the eyes and pounds Quance back into the ring. Butterfly suplex gets two. A back suplex from Pearce sets up the Figure-Four. Valentina helps out with some leverage and tries to pull the ropes away from Quance, but that doesn’t work as Quance reaches the ropes for the break. Pearce connects with a Jerry Lawler Fist Drop for 1-2-NO! This ain’t Memphis, pal. Pearce misses a senton bomb (?!) and gets caught in a bunch of nearfalls from Quance. Rolling Cutter gets two. Quance flips out of a German suplex and hits his Tornado Kick to set up the SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Cover, 1-2-WHAT! Valentina’s up on the apron to distract the ref away from his counting. This time Pearce ducks the Tornado Kick and kills poor Bobby Quance dead with the PILEDRIVER. (14:16) Reminds me of a Ric Flair/Brad Armstrong match. Afterwards, Babi Slymm gets him some of Pearce. Colt Cabana saves the champ, but Kazarian clears the ring with a steel chair. INSANITY! It’s a pier-six brawl until a bunch of other PWG scrubs and referees come in to break it up. **½

Frankie Kazarian vs. Spanky

This is Spanky’s PWG debut as he was received his WWE release in January. Spanky drops to the floor to escape a tie-up and throws a towel at the ref saying, “Wipe the grease off of him.” Nice. Lots of hiptoss counters ensue out of a headlock. Spanky does the Flair Flip onto the apron and runs up to the top rope. Kazarian wants to slam him down, but Spanky pokes him in the eyes and goes to the floor to get a taste of some Diet Coke. Back in, Spanky covers for two. Spanky buries a knee and starts working the leg. Kazarian punches back and hits the Springboard Legdrop, but OUCH. That was his bad leg! Delayed cover gets two. Kazarian counters the SLICED BREAD #2 with a backslide for two. He catches Spanky jumping out of the corner for BACK TO THE FUTURE, but Spanky counters that into a victory roll for 1-2-NO! Double-KO ensues. Spanky tries for SLICED BREAD #2 again, but Kazarian won’t stand for it and turns Spanky around into the WAVE OF THE FUTURE for the 1-2-3. (8:48) Criminally short, but pretty good for what we got to see. Post-match, they shake hands only for Spanky to pull Kazarian in for SLICED BREAD #2! **¾

PWG Tag Team Champions The X Foundation vs. Chris Bosh & Quicksilver (w/Charles Mercury)

The challengers dump out Joey Ryan real quick to start. Bosh delivers Extreme Bosh to Lost for 1-2-NO! SILVERADO SLAM from Quicksilver only gets two as well. Springboard Hart Attack earns another nearfall. Ryan runs in and delivers a Northern Lights suplex to Quicksilver only to pop up and receive Maximum Bosh. Quicksilver tags in for a drop toehold/standing moonsault combo for two. Quicksilver knocks Lost off the apron, but turns around into a jawbreaker. Ryan rolls over to his corner for a tag, but Lost isn’t there. Ryan looks to come off the ropes, but Bosh pulls the ropes down to send him flying out for a heel stomping. Back in, Bosh catapults Ryan into a spinning heel kick from Quicksilver for two. Quicksilver flips out of a back suplex, but then eats a superkick to set up a HOT TAG TO LOST! He’s got dropkicks and hurracanranas for everybody. Lost delivers a front slam into a swinging neckbreaker of sorts on Quicksilver. Not sure what that’s called. He gets a bunch of rollups on Bosh. Superkick is countered into a low blow and a half crab. Ryan breaks that up with a German suplex, but then Quicksilver and Bosh deliver a backbreaker/flying fist drop combo. Cover, 1-2-NO! Lost breaks that up with Lost In Space. Lost hits a jawbreaker across the knee and a running reverse neckbreaker gets 1-2-NO! Bosh avoids the Superman Spear, but gets whipped into Ryan in the corner. Bosh moves away from a Superkick and Ryan takes it right on the chin. Bosh shoves Lost out and covers Ryan for 1-2-3. (8:08) We’ve got new champs. Again, this was fun but way too short of a match. Afterwards, Joey Ryan walks out on Scott Lost holding his jaw. **½

Super Dragon vs. Scorpio Sky – Guerrilla Warfare Match

Guerrilla Warfare means anything goes and falls count anywhere. We kick this thing off with a Violence Party! From there, we get some real quick counters with Super Dragon winding up with a double stomp on Scorpio Sky. Dragon grabs a Walls of Jericho and maneuvers into a half crab and then an STF. They scuffle in the corner with both guys trying to execute their own Violence Parties. Dragon almost gets the better of Scorpio and goes for the Curb Stomp onto the chair, but Scorpio slides the chair away. Dragon blocks a flying armbar and delivers the Curb Stomp to the mat since there’s no chair near him. I mean, you might as well. Dragon tries for a charging elbow in the corner, but Scorpio pulls a chair up in his way. Chairshot to the back! Chairshot to the head! Cover, 1-2-NO! Scorpio applies a full nelson with the legs. I’m sure he has a name for that too, but nobody on commentary is any help. Scorpio delivers another chairshot to the back for two. They come to blows, but its Scorpio Sky who puts Dragon down with a dropkick. Figure-Four to Dragon. They end up smacking each other and Scorpio gives up on the hold. Scorpio pulls out a ladder and sets it up in the corner. Dragon tries to come up behind him for a Dragon Suplex, but Scorpio gets a hold of the ladder and brings it back into Dragon’s face to break that up. Dragon takes a drop toehold into the ladder and then a weak catapult into the ladder. Boo! Now Scorpio lays the ladder on top of Dragon and gives him a DOUBLE STOMP! Cover, 1-2-NO! Crippler Crossface is applied, but it does not get the submission. Scorpio nails Dragon with a missile dropkick that puts him on the floor, followed by a corkscrew plancha that wipes him out. That gets a pair of twos. Scorpio elbows out of the Dragon Suplex, but runs into a clothesline that flips him inside out. Dragon brings a table to ringside and beats Scorpio down on it so he can go up top, but Scorpio rolls off the table and turns the table over. They try again, but now Scorpio pops up and crotches him on the top rope. Scorpio attempts a hurracanrana, but Dragon counter that and drops down into an STF! Dragon whacks Scorpio with the chair again and gives Scorpio a suplex into the ladder in the corner! OUCH. Now he gives him a reverse suplex into the ladder. Cover, 1-2-NO! Scorpio blocks the PSYCHO DRIVER and delivers a reverse rana! Curb Stomp on the chair! FINAL ANSWER on the chair! Cover, 1-2-NO! Now Scorpio drags Dragon out to the floor to put him on that table for a Flying Senton! You can’t not have a table spot in an anything goes match. Cover by Scorpio, 1-2-NO! Now Scorpio pulls a page out of old school Super Dragon by going for the Phoenix Splash, but misses! Dragon tries the same move and falls right into a cutter! Scorpio holds onto Dragon and hooks on a Dragon Clutch! Super Dragon rolls him off and delivers the PSYCHO DRIVER! Dragon gets SUPER VIOLENT with the Violence Party and then puts Scorpio’s head on a set-up chair and gives him a DOUBLE STOMP TO THE HEAD! HOLY CRAP. Scorpio’s done. (22:00) Well that was violent. Great finish to a great match as I think that will shut Scorpio Sky up for a little while at least. I’m almost shocked this didn’t make it to the PWG Sells Out DVD set. ***¾

Final Thoughts: That’s the thing about PWG – it’s either a pretty solid show but nothing that blows you away, or a bunch of okay matches put together and a good main event. The latter is the case here. I have completely neutral feelings for this show.