Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
Why is this stirring a memory? A memory of Russo winning the title. Look he is playing the heel boss and needs to be involved in the angles but they are coming up with some seriously convoluted angles to get Russo involved in matches and to win. It is too much. He should not be in any match, save it for special occasions. This is not the WWF and he is not a McMahon, so don’t copy them. He does not need to be in a title match or anywhere near the title. I am sure he really thinks it is part of an angle but I question that at the same time, I think his ego ran away with him and while I don’t believe that he wanted WCW to fail at the same time I question his decisions as he was not thinking long term and wanted success for himself letting it go to his head, thinking the fans would dig the angle and make him more hated but instead it is just going to make WCW look even worse. Basically, if he does win the title there is no sugar coating it or trying to explain how it advances angles as it is just sheer fucking stupidity of the highest order….Nitro received a 2.9 with a 3.2 first hour while RAW received a 5.6.
Russo arrives in a limo after a voiceover done by Borash gushing about how great Russo is. Both depart the limo and JB will not shut up about how great Russo is and how he will win the title. He is told to shut up but keeps going.
Match 1: Vito v. Johnny the Bull
Three minutes in and they have been getting after it, mostly with Kendo sticks. Oh and Vito’s “sister” is in the crowd. Bull is still walloping him with the stick. Vito comes back and he destroys Bull but Reno makes the save and hangs him upside down in the corner, Vito is hung and gets blasted. The sister stops it.
** Okay. Really just a brawl.
Russo is walking in the back as JB kisses ass.
David Flair finds an address at a payphone and accosts a passerby to tell him where it is.
Here comes JJ soon followed by Steiner. JJ tells us to listen up. Tonight is the night we have all been waiting for. A new WCW champ will be crowned and all the NY Slapasses will be a part of history when Russo makes good. Steiner yells about being booed when the fans cheer for both the Giants and Jets who are losers. He then taunts Jumbo Elliot for once being good but now he sucks. The fans need to kiss his ass as he is the man who made Goldberg quit and ran him out of town. Now he introduces the next WCW champ and calls out Russo. Jesus. He loves NY etc and brags about Long Island and sports stars. He now calls his home Atlanta and he tells us about it such as NASCAR and the Georgia Bulldogs, and inbreds such as cousins making babies with cousins. Oh and John Rocker. He goes off on Rocker. He continues. Sting’s music blares and he yells hey boys from the Tron and they show Booker T and Sting pops up from behind and tells them that he has Booker’s back and then tells Russo to turn around and he does and Goldberg is in the crowd and he gives Russo a salute.
Sanders finds Kronik and gets made fun of but he informs them that they are not in the tag tournament and that angers them.
Match 2: Tag Title Battle Royal
Both team members have to be eliminated….Why didn’t the Cat just get FA the titles back and instead we get this. Kaz and Evan are gone. Kronik head down and they take out both Harris’ and assault everyone. Jindrak and O’Haire are just chilling on the apron as Noble gets chokeslammed and tossed and so does Shannon More. Loco hits a missile kick. Cajun is gone and Loco’s caught and tossed and security swarms. So, why did they let them eliminate everyone if they were not involved in the match? Juve and Rey are against Jindrak and O’Haire and the FA got mauled and Rey is hit with a Seanton but htey do not toss him. Disco gets involved and he nearly causes Juve to get ousted. Konnan chases him off as Juve hangs in the balance and he is shoved off. Rey is alone and gets in a couple of moves but he is kicked off the ropes and he is out.
Torrie is lotioning up. Sweet.
Oh shit, the Howard Stern Wack Pack and they are stuttering nonsense. Jesus. Nash comes in and is baffled that Gene is wasting time with them. He mocks Beetlejuice as he celebrates with the new tag champs.
Match 3: ICP v.
ICP challenges Awesome and calls him retarded. They challenge him to a Hardcore Handicap Match. The bus drives up and they go to him and get sprayed by an extinguisher, but ICP take him out by bashing the shit out of him with garbage cans and take him up to the hood of the bus and Violent J sets up a table. Awesome fights back and nails Shaggy and then kicks J through the table. Shaggy and Awesome are on top of the bus. Awesome has Shaggy and Awesome Bombs him on top of the bus! He slides to the ground and Awesome wins.
** Extra half star for that ending.
David has entered some sort of Chuck E. Cheese and he is looking in the ball pit.
Here comes the Cat and Ms Jones. Cat goes off on Nash and JJ and Steiner and they will be fired if they intervene in the title match. Sanders comes out and is called part of the Natural Born Ratings Killers. Sanders calls him a cupcake and seeing as Russo has an important match he better not screw up. The fans chant asshole as Cat flips him off. Sanders asks again and then again what the fans said so they chant it some more. He is going to give the Cat five seconds to make a choice and Cat mauls him and now Nash comes out with the rest of the Thrillers, draws up a quick play and they come down piecemeal, shitty play, and get destroyed. Sanders hits Cat with a bat and they decimate the Cat. Fans chant for Hall.
Tigress and Paisley brag about each other and how the other girls should not have come.
Bikini Contest. All the ladies are wearing coats. The judges are the Whack Pack and the fans don’t give a shit. The drunken dwarf is there too. Leia Meow is hot. Torrie is too. Whoah. Paisley and Tigress take each other’s coats off. Leia now. Damn. Gunns is so fucking white trash. She has a Red, White and Blue bikini on and Duggan comes down and calls her a disgrace to Canada and makes her head to the back but not before she shows off again….Canada can have her. Paulshock shows off her tits. This is so long and atrocious. The Pac is so confused and they all declare her the winner despite not being in the contest. Leia attacks her and taunts her with the riding crop. Midajah comes out of nowhere. Leia stands there and finally Midajah awkwardly slams her.
HOLY SHIT THAT WAS HORRIBLE!!
Steiner talks about Midajah and then he claims that Goldberg quite but gets ambushed and beaten by Goldberg.
Disco is in the ring trying to be hip and he claims he is the last Filthy Animal member and they are not allowed back in. He has a new partner and out comes Steiner and Disco looks scared. Steiner kicks his ass. He calls out Goldberg and challenges him. Goldberg obliges but it must be in the cage with no interference or ref. Steiner accepts but runs off. Goldberg catches him and brings him back, he bounces his head off the lowering cage and brings him in. The bell rings.
Match 3: Scott Steiner v. Goldberg
Steiner gets in a blow or two but he is decleated with a clothesline and crushed via a powerslam. Goldberg hammers him on the floor and brings him back into the ring. Steiner comes back and strikes with a belly to belly suplex and gets two. He stomps on Goldberg who comes back and takes him down, pulls him back up and drops him with a headbutt. Steiner fires back and goes up top and hits with a lariat. He does some pushups and pulls him up, Goldberg slips behind and butterfly suplexes Steiner. He whips him into the ropes and telegraphs the lowering of the back and gets nutted. Steiner release suplexes him and brings Steiner his pipe and he belts Goldberg with it. He tries to leave but Jumbo Elliot keeps the door closed. Goldberg attacks and gets hit and taken back into the ring. But Goldberg spears him! Match as Goldberg leaves.
** This should have been much longer.
Russo is next.
JJ is walking by and Beetlejuice calls him Slap Nuts and JJ asks him again what he said. After he repeats it JJ kills him with the guitar. Now that was awesome!
Booker knows that Russo will have back up and so will he….
Match 4: General Rection v. Jeff Jarrett
JJ takes him down and poses for the crowd. Rection comes back. Storm and Skipper come down and get wiped out. JJ is sideslammed. Rection goes up but is hit by the board and finished off.
* Has Rection won one match? Fucking horrible.
Team Canada hammer him as JJ has him in the Figure Four. MIA run out and get mauled. Sting runs down and makes the save with the bat. Storm is pissed and he challenges Sting and it is Showtime!
Match 5: Lance Storm v. Sting
Of course this started during the break, instead of skipping a shitty match would be most of the rest of the show. Storm has controlled the match. He hammers Sting and dropkicks him. After a two count, Sting comes back with three lariats. Sting runs up top but he is crotched. Storm goes up after him but he is punched and knocked off. Sting hits the top rope lariat. Sting misses the Stinger Splash in the corner but he elbows Storm to the floor, whips him into the railing but misses and Storm pounds on him and then rolls him back into the ring. Storm springboard dropkicks Sting and then side suplexes him. Two count. Storm slowly goes up top and hits the crossbody but Sting rolls on top and gets two. Sting bulldogs him and now the Splash hits. Sting goes for the Deathlock but Storm counters with the Maple Leaf! It is hooked in the middle of the ring and after nearly a minute Sting crawls for the ropes and finally makes it. He has Sting’s leg but the enzuguri ends that. Sting goes for the Deathdrop but Storm escapes and is suplexed and Sting finally hits the Deathdrop for the win.
**1/2 Good wrestlers bring out the best in Sting. Too bad it the match was cut off due to the commercial. But, I am not keen on Storm losing. He has lost to Booker and Sting and there is nothing wrong with that but at the same time if they are going to push him then the match needs to be longer and even better. The match was fine but WCW always jobs an up and comer for some reason but it does not hurt Storm and I am over analyzing it.
Flair finds the house and it is the wrong on and the old guy is scared. It is next door and they are not home. The guy says they are outta town. Flair wants him to give them a message and that is he will be here waiting for them….Then he leaves! Old dude calls him crazy and is going to call the police.
Russo talks about winning the title.
Match 6: Vince Russo v. Booker T (c) for WCW Title
Russo has shoulder pads and a Giants helmet.
They are in the cage and the dressing room empties. Russo charges Booker and unloads on him with a bat. He is choking out Booker with the bat and keeps hitting him with it. Russo pulls out a ladder and shoves it into the ring. He hits Booker again with the bat. He finally gets into the ring and sets up the ladder. He climbs it and opens up the ceiling. Awesome kicks him back down. Sting lowers onto the cage. Russo falls off the ladder and now Booker slams him. Russo dead-weighted him. Booker takes off the helmet and pulls him back up and decks him. Russo is getting mauled. Luger comes out of nowhere and pushes a pipe through the cage and Russo wallops Booker with it over and over. Russo is hitting him even more. Ric Flair comes out of nowhere dressed as an EMT. He is beating on Russo and puts him in the Figure Four. For a second. Booker is back in the ring. Thrillers come down and there is a donnybrook outside the ring. Axe kick from Booker and he kicks him again. Here comes Goldberg after he heads to the door. Booker stops and waits for him for some reason. Okay….He lets Goldberg in and Steiner pops up and slams the door on Booker and gets it kicked back into his face. Goldberg spears Russo through the cage as Booker steps out! Who wins? Goldberg and Booker highfive and leave and we fade…..
*1/2 Overbooked but it was nice to see Flair and Luger. We will see how it plays out.
*1/2 Another ho-hum show. The Goldberg and Lance matches did help, as did the JJ guitar shot but what killed it was the horrible bikini contest. The fact that Booker did not leave the cage was pretty bad….But the fact that Russo may win the title is even worse. It devalues the title and adds NOTHING. I think I understand his thinking: That it allows Booker to get revenge and keeps the angle interesting, and faces should chase the title. But instead it just makes the title and Booker T look bad at the expense of Russo. Just kick his ass and be done with it. Or, have the main event be a Tag Match with Sting and Booker and Goldberg v. JJ and Steiner and either Storm in order to get revenge or Nash. But don’t put the title on the line. It is not Rocket Surgery but Russo likes to think he is smart and overly complicates the things to the point where they are unintelligible. I wills say that I did not remember Booker walking out the door at the same time and thought it was a cleaner win when Goldberg speared him. Still stupid though. One thing for sure, you aren’t going to compete with the WWF with shit like this. Make the earlier two matches twice as long, throw in a Cruiserweight Match. Toss out the bikini shit and make the main event what I stated it should have been….Scratch that, no Goldberg and Steiner rematch. Save it for the tag match and set it up for Starrcade down the road. But this is WCW and this is Vince Russo.
31-year old currently living in Syracuse, New York. Longtime fan of the New York Mets, Chicago Bulls and Minnesota Vikings. Avid fan of professional wrestling and write reviews/articles on the product. Usually focusing on the old school wrestling.