Written By: Matt Peddycord
February 13, 2005
The current NWA & TNA Champs were as follows:
NWA World Champion: Jeff Jarrett (6/2/2004)
NWA World Tag Team Champions: America’s Most Wanted (1/16/2005)
TNA X-Division Champion: AJ Styles (1/16/2005)
Your hosts are Mike Tenay & Don West.
Lawyers have invaded Jeff Jarrett’s dressing room and Shane Douglas is determined to find out what in the world is going on. Larry Zbyszko tells you nothing because he’s got to find the Directory of Authority Dusty Rhodes.
Scott Hudson is by Kevin Nash’s dressing room. Apparently his Hollywood pals Adam Sandler, Chris Rock and Burt Reynolds have all showed up to hang out with the challenger. Of course Hudson doesn’t say their names – he speaks in code! They’re all going to be in the same movie remake The Longest Yard premiering May 27th! That’s why their pals! Anyways, there’s no party noise coming from Nash’s room. That means he’s either focusing on his match tonight or 8pm is nap time.
Petey Williams (w/Scott D’Amore) vs. Elix Skipper
Elix Skipper wants to break out as a singles star in TNA and looks to earn a win over the ex-X Division champ. A little bit of back and forth nothing goes on to start until Skipper dropkicks Williams to the floor. Back in, Williams climbs the turnbuckle to try and escape a tie-up only to take an armdrag down to the mat. Skipper snapmares Williams over for a swift kick to the back, but gets dumped to the floor to set up a slingshot hurracanrana from Williams. Nice! Back in, that gets two. Petey delivers the O CANADA crotch stomp with Skipper stuck in the tree of woe. Snap suplex/back suplex combo gets two for Williams. Skipper does the Matrix move to avoid a flying bodypress, but gets his head slammed down on the mat. Petey heads to the top and gets caught for a Butterfly Superplex! Skipper gives Williams a reverse suplex onto the ropes and then follows up with a springboard legdrop for two. Williams catches Skipper out of the corner and hits the Tilt-A-Whirl Russian Legsweep. Skipper places Williams on the top rope for what he calls New School which is the rope walk finished off with a rana. Scott D’Amore holds onto Petey’s legs though to keep him from going with the move. Williams capitalizes with a tornado DDT. Skipper backdrops out of the Canadian Destroyer attempt, but Petey lands on his feet and goes for a tilt-a-whirl into a sunset flip, which is botched badly. Skipper still falls back for two. Skipper blocks another Canadian Destroyer attempt and backs Petey into the corner. Williams ducks a springboard kick and tries to jump off the middle rope into the Canadian Destroyer like he did to AJ Styles at Victory Road, but Skipper has it scouted and counters into SUDDEN DEATH! It’s the Kryptonite Krunch/Celtic Cross/Schwein. That gets Skipper the victory. (7:59) Some missed spots here and there and not much in the way of a story. These two are the type of wrestlers who were only good with ring generals – not each other. **¼
Matt Bentley & Kazarian vs. BG James & Jeff Hammond (w/Ron Killings & Konnan)
This is bad even in TNA terms. Jeff Hammond is an old NASCAR crew chief turned Fox Sports NASCAR analyst (as opposed to the Fox Sports NASCAR analrapists) who did some commentary work for TNA . All of a sudden, he finds himself teamed up with 3Live Kru in a feud with Kazarian and Bentley because they think NASCAR is retarded – like any rationally thinking person would. But then again I do recap wrestling in my free time, so am I really in a position to judge what’s rational? BG James may be the only exception, but are we supposed to believe that Konnan and Ron Killings really care about defending NASCAR? Probably the most entertaining part of this match is that we find out Don West doesn’t even get HOME until 6am when Jeff Hammond is up and about pumping iron and stuff. Who is he, Batman? Out fighting crime at nights? Does he work a third shift job? I’d love to know what he’s doing out at 4AM on a Tuesday. Anyways, BG James works the majority of the match as the face in peril including Bentley and Kazarian delivering double-team swinging neckbreakers while Hammond gets the not-so-hot tag. To say that the crowd is booing this whole heat segment would be an understatement. The finish comes with Bentley giving Kazarian a SUPERKICK by accident after Hammond moves out of the way. BG James pulls Bentley out as Hammond runs around the ring mimicking that he’s driving a car and drops an elbow on Kazarian for the three-count. (5:35) Wow. Kazarian jobs to Jeff FN Hammond. No wonder he left the company. At least if you’re jobbing on Velocity, you’re not jobbing to Jeff Hammond. Just a terrible match, but at least Kaz and Bentley tried to salvage something from this by delivering their usually great spots to BG James. ½*
We go out to Dusty’s truck/office where Larry Zbyszko and a lawyer meets up with him. Not that it matters, but Traci and Trinity are still hanging around Dusty. The lawyer presents an affidavit to Dusty that he’ll drop the stipulation from the NWA world title match that if Jarrett uses the guitar, he loses the belt. Dusty tells him to stick his head between his legs and get on outta here! If he does sign it, the lawyer guy will have Dusty evicted. Is that anything like “Loser Leaves Town” rules? Dusty tells him to get lost.
Raven vs. Dustin Rhodes
Raven’s been breaking people’s fingers again, so now Dustin Rhodes is here to avenge all of us who love not having our fingers broken! Well actually, Raven “broke” Cassidy Riley’s fingers who just happens to be Dustin’s protégé of sorts. Rhodes controls to start by brawling in and out of the ring. Back in, Raven gets Dustin’s leg tangled in the ropes and then starts twisting the knee. Raven applies an ankle lock. Rhodes gets to his feet and kicks Raven off into the corner. They trade Bulldog attempts, ending with Rhodes catching Raven with a clothesline. Rhodes shoves Raven down from the top, but comes down chest-first into a boot. Rhodes blocks the Raven Effect and nails Raven with a hook kick. That gets two. Raven grabs another ankle lock, but gets shot off through the ropes. Raven butts Dustin down with his shoulder, but he’s just setting Raven up for a surprise ankle lock. Now Raven flips over and sends Rhodes into the corner. Raven rolls up Rhodes with his feet on the ropes for the 1-2-3. (8:22) This was really boring. Because of the finger breaking angle, we’ve got a rematch next month! Now it finally picks up after the match with Raven putting Rhodes in a straight jacket and beating him with a trashcan and whipping him with a leather strap. Cassidy Riley runs in for the save, but fails big time and eats the RAVEN EFFECT. Security breaks it up. Finally! Those guys are always late! *
A Trytan hype video sneaks up on us on the jumbotron! He debuts this week on iMPACT!
NWA World Tag Team Champions America’s Most Wanted vs. Kid Kash & Lance Hoyt
Kid Kash & Lance Hoyt (formerly known as Dallas) renew their feud with AMW over the NWA world tag titles. Storm fights off a headlock to lead into some indy-style heel trips that lead into a stalemate. Harris and Hoyt tag in for a shoving match. Harris can’t suplex Hoyt, so Hoyt buries a knee and tags Kash in as he runs into an armdrag. AMW tries that spot where they catch Kash after a double-hiptoss and then they toss Kash into Hoyt. Doesn’t work because Kash is so small. Instead, Hoyt receives the same treatment and gets thrown on top of Kash for the lulz. The heels take to the floor as Harris backdrops Storm on top of them. Storm rolls Kash in, but gets floored with a clothesline from Hoyt. Now he takes Storm and hiptosses him on the concrete. Back in, Hoyt flips Kash over on top of Storm for two. Kash makes an illegal switch and clamps on a chinlock while Harris has the ref. Storm fights out, but runs into a boot in the corner and receives a Double Jump Moonsault for 1-2-NO! In comes Hoyt for a choke lift into a sitout powerbomb! That gets two. Kash tries a Frog Splash, but hits knees. We get a collision to set up the HOT TAG TO HARRIS! It takes three clotheslines from Harris to put Hoyt down. Kash runs into a AA Spinebuster to wipe him out. Stalling suplex to Hoyt! Kash comes back in and takes Harris over with a Double Jump Hurracanrana! Storm gives Kash the EYE OF THE STORM! He wants to deliver the Swinging Noose (reverse tornado DDT) to Hoyt, but Hoyt punches him back and nails Storm with a SIDE SLAM FROM THE TOP ROPE! Cover, 1-2-NO! Now Hoyt gets caught up in the corner for a hurracanrana from Storm! Harris flies in with a flying elbow drop for 1-2-NO! Kash brings the NWA tag belts to the apron. Kash lets the ref find one of them, but creams Storm with the other belt! Cover, 1-2-NO! Kash brings some handcuffs into the ring, but gets speared by Harris tripping Hoyt up inadvertently in the process. Now Kash gets handcuffed to the top turnbuckle while AMW delivers the DEATH SENTENCE to Hoyt for the win. (12:28) Nice formula tag match. Clearly America’s Most Wanted were the best tag team in the US in 2005. ***¼
In the back, Shane Douglas has spotted a limo! Who’s in the limo? TNA security stands in his way and says nothing! They must be mutes! Sad. I felt like I was watching WCW there.
Abyss vs. Jeff Hardy – Full Metal Mayhem Match
If you’re wondering what a Full Metal Mayhem match is, it means “everything metal is legal” like chairs, ladders, chains, thumbtacks, and things that aren’t metal like wooden tables. Has this month-long feud been going on long enough to go to the lengths of this insane ‘point of no return’ extremely violent type stipulation? Pfft, no. But has logic ever stopped TNA before from doing these kind of hardcore matches? Pfft, no. The only way to win is to pull down a contract stuck in one of the two manila envelopes hanging from the ceiling. Yes, one has the contract and the other envelope is empty. Do we really need this match to be so complicated? Anyways, the contract guarantees an NWA world title shot. Hardy uses the stick-and-run strategy to start until Abyss press slams him. Abyss misses a legdrop to set up the double legdrop to the groin. Hardy brings a couple chairs into the ring. He sets up one for Poetry in Motion, but Abyss walks out to the floor before any damage can be done. Hardy still wants to fly, so he moves the chair and flies out on top of Abyss anyways. Jeff tries the same spot over with Abyss on the apron, but Abyss turns the chair over as Hardy starts running and dares him to try that again. He charges at Abyss and runs into a military press on the apron, but Hardy slips away and blasts Abyss with a chair. This time Abyss blocks the chair-assisted Poetry in Motion by nailing Hardy with a chair while he’s in mid-air. Down on the floor, Abyss stacks two tables on top of each other. Abyss wants to powerbomb him through the stack of tables, but Hardy punches out and screws up the Whisper in the Wind spot. They play tug of war over the ladder, so Hardy backs Abyss into the corner, runs up the ladder and dropkicks a chair in his face. Hardy creates the seesaw effect with some ladders and then launches himself onto the opposite end to pop the other end of the ladder into Abyss. If Joey Mercury were watching this today, he would totally be cringing right now. Now with Abyss stuck in the ropes, Hardy charges and gets flipped out over the top rope through a table. Ouch. He hits the table with his legs so you can only guess where his back lands. They brawl up the entrance ramp where Abyss sets up a table. Hardy hits a TWIST OF FATE and beats Abyss down on the table so he can climb up to the top of the entrance tunnel and flip down on top of Abyss for a lame looking Swanton Bomb. BUT HE WAS THIRTY POSSIBLY FORTY FEET UP IN THE AIR, MIKE TENAY! Back to ringside, Hardy gets out the big ladder and starts climbing for the envelopes. He grabs the wrong one! Abyss pulls him down when Jeff goes after the envelope with the contract inside and whips Jeff over the top rope onto the stack of tables. He actually messes the spot pretty badly – breaking maybe one table. Not enough airtime, I suppose. With Jeff angrily kicking the tables at ringside, Abyss climbs up and grabs the envelope to secure himself a title match. (15:47) Even though Hardy only messed up a time or two, this was still not one of the better Abyss hardcore matches. What makes this match even more meaningless is that Abyss never got that NWA world title match promised with the winner of the main event. **
Team Canada (w/Scott D’Amore & Johnny Devine) vs. Diamond Dallas Page & Monty Brown
When you don’t have anything else to do for a pair of main eventers, just put them together as a tag team. Young can’t get away from a Monty Brown arm wringer to start. He’s too strong! Roode ends up tripping Young and pulling him out to safety instead. Even then, Brown gets a hold of Young’s arm and pulls him into the ring. Roode and DDP tag in. Page hits the leg swing around into a clothesline spot and tags in Brown for a suplex. That gets two. Page tags back in, but gets caught with a knee from the apron by Young and blasted with a clothesline from Roode. Page fights out of the corner until Roode clips him and tags Young to drop an elbow. Back to Page and Roode. They collide, setting up Page diving headfirst into Roode’s balls. Hot tag to Brown, he hits the Fallaway Slam on Young. Just as it looks Brown has the match won, Roode runs in and clotheslines him from behind with the hockey stick. Now Johnny Devine hops in the ring for a triple stomping on Brown while D’Amore has the ref distracted. Roode hits the suplex as Young delivers the flying elbow for 1-2-NO! Brown shoves off a front headlock and reaches Page for a tag. With discus clotheslines and big boots for everyone (including Devine). It breaks down into a pier-six brawl, as Page and Brown counter a double-whip into one another by spinning each other around and returning the favor on Team Canada with clotheslines. We get DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKERS on opposite sides of the ring with D’Amore and Devine getting involved. POUNCE to Roode! He rolls out to the floor as DDP crotches Young on the top rope for a DIAMOND CUTTER! Cover, 1-2-3. (9:46) Fun stuff as Team Canada didn’t seem to mind being Page and Monty’s punching bags. **½
The lawyer guy returns to Dusty’s truck/office to see if he signed the affidavit or not. Dusty’s not there, so Traci and Trinity have to tell him off.
TNA X-Division Champion AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels – 30-Minute Ironman Match
Daniels had been complaining to TNA management about how Styles was being given everything on a silver platter, and how he believed he could beat AJ Styles in ten minutes. Well, Christopher Daniels couldn’t beat AJ Styles in ten minutes on iMPACT, so now they must go at it for THIRTY minutes. Nice feeling-out process to start as they go from there right into some quick rollups. Daniels shuts AJ down with a clothesline and paintbrushes him, but then runs into a dropkick that puts him on the floor. Styles follows him out to brawl and they nearly get counted out. Back in, AJ controls the arm to the point where Daniels has to take a timeout on the floor. Meanwhile, Styles nails him with a baseball slide and delivers a springboard plancha. Back in, Daniels cuts off a springboard clothesline with a running forearm and knocks Styles to the guardrail. Back in again, Daniels buries some knees to the ribs and follows up with a back suplex that lands AJ on his stomach. More damage done to the ribs by Daniels. AJ catches Daniels telegraphing a backdrop and nails him with a discus clothesline. Spin kick connects followed by an Asai DDT. Cover, 1-2-NO! Styles delivers the suplex into a reverse neckbreaker for 1-2-NO! AJ tries the 450 Splash, but Daniels gets the knees up! ANGELS WINGS! Cover, 1-2-3. (14:09 | Daniels – 1 | Styles – 0) Daniels gives Styles a double knee gutbuster. He stalls too long to get another pinfall. AJ mounts a comeback, but Daniels stops him when he tries a hiptoss and clamps on an ab stretch. West ~ “Daniels is pulling on the neck!” Sometimes I wonder about you, Don. Styles powers out with the hiptoss, but then he charges at Daniels and gets hung out to dry on the top rope. Slow cover gets two. Daniels delivers a suplex into a gutbuster for another nearfall. That was cool. Out of nowhere, Styles flips out of a back suplex and levels Daniels with a handspring elbow off the ropes. Think Tajiri. From there, AJ hoists Daniels up for a fireman’s carry and flips him over neck-first across his knee for 1-2-NO! Springboard forearm connects for another nearfall! Daniels does something you wouldn’t expect and that’s pull out an Asai DDT on AJ for 1-2-NO! Pretty cool. Blue Thunder Driver gets two. Now AJ blocks a suplex and hits a Pele Kick! He unloads with forearms, but then runs into a Samoan drop. Daniels lands on his feet when he tries the BME once AJ moves and takes a German suplex. AJ rolls through, but Daniels flips over him. LAST RITES is countered as AJ busts out the ANGELS WINGS! Cover, 1-2-NO! Daniels backs AJ into the corner to avoid the STYLES CLASH, but then Styles gets a rollup out of nowhere for 1-2-3! (24:01 | Styles – 1 | Daniels – 1) Daniels shoves AJ through the ropes and posts him to give us some blood! Daniels is feeling pretty confident now. Running STO slam only gets two. Daniels works the cut with some nasty headbutts. AJ gets a rush of adrenaline and fires away on Daniels with forearms with only a minute left, but then he runs into a reverse STO to set up the KOJI CLUTCH! AJ looks out of it, but he holds on long enough for the time to expire. (30:00 | Styles – 1 | Daniels – 1) Daniels demands Dusty continue the match, so we go into SUDDEN DEATH overtime! Ugh, must they always do that? Back in the ring, AJ counters a corner hurracanrana by flipping Daniels over to the mat. He snaps off a flying hurracanrana of his own and rolls through THAT into the STYLES CLASH! Cover, 1-2-3! (32:28 | Styles – 2 | Daniels – 1) The sudden death overtime spiel has been done to death, so I had to knock it down a quarter star for that. Otherwise, this was fantastic wrestling with great storytelling from both guys. ****1/2
Jeff Jarrett’s lawyer fellow couldn’t get Dusty to change his mind, so now ol’ Double J has to take matters into his own hands – by any means necessary.
NWA World Heavyweight Champion Jeff Jarrett vs. Kevin Nash
As you may have read earlier in the recap – if Jarrett uses his guitar, he loses the belt. Nash fully dominates to start. They go to the floor where Nash hits Snake Eyes on the NWA world title belt that’s sitting on the announce table. In the ring, Jarrett gets in some shots, but he’s quickly thrown out the ring and into the crowd. They fight backstage (ever heard of a ten count, ref?) where Nash whips Jarrett into a catering table. Don West makes sure to inform us that he is quite disappointed. Nash hits Jarrett with a chair to bust him open (ever heard of a DQ, ref?). Somewhere La Parka is screaming at the TV ~ “Ring the bell, ref! Nash just used a guitar!” Back to ringside, Nash lifts up the mats for a possible Jackknife Powerbomb, but Jarrett lowblows Nash and pulls out a cello from under the ring! Oh, that’s cute. Jarrett pulls it out of its case and tries to smash the cello on Nash, but the handle comes off! BWAHAHAHA. Jarrett bashes the cello against Nash’s knee anyway and now it’s time to go to school. He even uses the cello case which may or may not be heavy and slams the lid on Nash’s knee. A bloody Jeff Jarrett applies the FIGURE-FOUR! Nash makes the ropes, but Jarrett stays on the knee. Nash legdrops Jarrett a bunch of times to escape a legbar and follows up with the Big Boot and the Side Slam for 1-2-NO! Snake Eyes connects, but Jarrett slips out of a second one and clips the knee. It’s cello time again! Nash lowblows Jarrett before anymore embarrassment can happen. Now Nash has the cello, but the ref stands in his way. Nash lays the cello down instead and goes to Jackknife Jarrett on it. On the first try, he swings Jarrett into the ref to knock him out. Nash tries it a second time and JACKKNIFE POWERBOMBS Jarrett on the cello! Nash covers, but no ref. Next thing you know, The Man Formerly Known As Billy Gunn runs in and wallops Nash with a steel chair. Jarrett gives Billy Gunn the thumbs up and covers Nash for 1-2-NO! Another ref stops Billy Gunn from entering the ring again as Sean Waltman enters the ring and spin kicks Jarrett down. Bronco Buster sets up the X-FACTOR. Now Nash covers Jarrett for 1-2-NO! All of a sudden, Billy Gunn is back in the ring with the NWA title belt. He goes to nail Nash, but BG James pulls the belt out of his hand. Nash gets rid of Gunn, but turns around into a belt shot from Jarrett. Cover, 1-2-NO! What the F. That should have been it. The STROKE! Cover, 1-2-NO! Alright, that’s enough TNA. Nash goozles Jarrett as he comes off the top rope only until Jarrett shoves the ref and kicks Nash in the nuts to set up one more STROKE for the final 1-2-3. (19:44) Wow. That first ref bump sure did trigger a ridiculous series of stupid. Billy Gunn or Kip James is not even close to being any sort of logical choice to interfere on Jarrett’s behalf and we received no post-match explanation as to why he would help Jarrett out for any reason. For example, I can see why Waltman would help Nash out if only because they’re friends from way back, but I fail to see the connection between Billy Gunn and Jeff Jarrett. If I was watching this PPV as it happened, I would be completely confused and probably a little disappointed because now we’ve got Billy Gunn running with the main event guys. History has proved that he’s a ’round peg in a square hole’ situation. **
Final Thoughts: It’s a pretty dull first hour with the rest being top-notch up until the silly main event. I mean come on, cellos? Give me a break, Jeff. If you’re not going to use the guitar, don’t use any musical instrument at all. On the other hand, you have the 30-minute ironman match which is excellent and a must-see if you enjoy your X-Division with a little depth. The lesser of the last three PPVs, but I’ll still go with a mild thumbs up for Against All Odds 2005.