TNA Impact 1/3/2013

“The Icon” Sting returns to TNA. Samoa Joe and Kurt Angle team up to take on the Aces and Eights inside a steel cage. Plus, Hulk Hogan makes a major announcement regarding the relationship of Bully Ray and Brooke Hogan!
Total Non-Stop Action presents Impact
Date: 1/3/2013
From: Orlando, FL
Jeremy Borash is in the ring to kick off the show. He is going to award the Wrestler of the Year trophy. The finalists for the award are Bully Ray, James Storm, Austin Aries, Bobby Roode and Jeff Hardy. They all appear at the top of the aisle way. The winner of the award is Jeff Hardy, obviously. But, Roode and Aries argue while walking to the ring that they were going to win only for Hardy to steal it. Hardy enters the ring and grabs a microphone to cut a promo. Hardy says winning the award is just as important as winning the championship. Bobby Roode enters the ring and is pissed. Roode thinks it crap that Hardy says the award is equal to the championship. Roode reminds Hardy that he set records and made history. He became the longest reigning champion in TNA history. Austin Aries enters the ring and shares his thoughts saying the voting was rigged. Aries beat Bobby Roode and earned an average of four stars per every pay per view match. Jeff Hardy chimes in and announces they will be competing in a triple threat match. Hardy is attacked by Aries when he turns around and Roode gets in on the attack. Roode holds Hardy but Aries hits Roode with the trophy on accident. Hardy hits the Twist of Fate on Aries and the trophy is messed up now. Hardy leaves the heels laying.
Backstage, James Storm is cut off by Bad Influence. Kazarian interviews Daniels, who acts like Storm and does a good job of it. Storm mockingly laughs at them. Storm says that he may have not of won the championship and says he will kick Daniels in the Twitter and Kazarian in the Facebook. Storm leaves and tells them to pick who wants to meet him in the ring.
Opening Contest: James Storm vs. Kazarian
This is a rematch from Final Resolution. Daniels faked Storm out and allowed Kazarian to attack Storm from behind. Storm battles back with right hands and a clothesline. Storm takes Kazarian out with a slingshot cross body and stalks Daniels into the ring. Kazarian regains control with a strike on the floor. They are right in front of So Cal Val. Storm hits the Closing Time in the ring to stop Kazarian’s offense. Storm hits a side Russian leg sweep and heads to the top rope. Storm hits an elbow drop but can’t get a three count. Daniels distracts Storm to allow Kazarian to dropkick James into the corner and hits the TKO but Storm kicked out at two. Another Closing Time by Storm and knocks Daniels off the apron. Kazarian springs off the middle rope but is met with the Last Call. Storm gets the three count.
Your Winner: James Storm
Match Rating: **. A good finish to an overall lackluster match. I feel like these two just don’t click for some reason.
Backstage, Devon is talking to Mr. Anderson. Anderson wants to just chill and think about what is going on. Anderson enjoys the recruitment process of having several girls all over him. DOC needs to know right now if Anderson is with them. Anderson says they can’t show Sting even an ounce of fear. Anderson gives DOC his hammer and they leave.
Backstage, Kenny King walks into Kid Kash saying he remembers watching him on VHS. Kash has beaten Rob Van Dam several times in the past. King knows that Kash will beat Christian York and they will meet at Genesis.
DOC makes his way out to the arena by himself. DOC enters the ring and asks where Sting is. He wants Sting to come out and join the party. He doesn’t feel like a marked man. DOC thinks this is bullshit and he is tired of waiting. DOC is going to cripple Sting once and for all. A baseball bat falls from the rafters and DOC begins to freak out saying he isn’t afraid of Sting. We go to commercial.
Backstage, Brooke Hogan says she hasn’t talked to Hulk Hogan yet and they will find out live tonight, of course.
Second Contest: Kid Kash vs. Christian York in a TNA X-Division Tournament Match
Kash doesn’t get an entrance, which usually means he is losing. Kash attacks York before the bell and delivers a clothesline. York nails Kash with a discus forearm and a kick. They end up on the floor where Kash chops York and hits a nice slingshot hurricanrana on the floor! York dropkicks Kash in midair on a springboard dropkick attempt. York kicks Kash down again from the apron. York big boots Kash and hit a half nelson suplex. Kash slams York down to the canvas and delivers a few shots. York blocks a twisting moonsault by getting his knees up. York kicks Kash and botches a handspring kick as he didn’t actually spring. York hit a kneeling Flatliner for a near fall. York hits the Mood Swing and wins the match.
Your Winner: Christian York
Match Rating: **. I feel like York has some awkward moments when he wrestles, or at least did in this match. Kash is a solid hand in the ring, but I don’t think York is ready for a push just yet.
Backstage, TNA World Tag Team Champions Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero Jr. are saying they aren’t afraid of Joey Ryan and Matt Morgan. They aren’t afraid of anybody! Hernandez just whistles.
Third Contest: TNA World Tag Team Champion Hernandez vs. Joey Ryan
Mike Tenay finally mentions these two were former partners. Matt Morgan comes out and has his arm in a sling, but he will be 100% in ten days. So, Joey Ryan is taking his spot. Ryan didn’t agree to this but does it anyway.
Ryan enters and attacks Hernandez from behind but is quickly slammed down. Hernandez delivers a backbreaker. Morgan holds Hernandez on from the floor. Morgan is healthy! It’s a miracle! Hernandez shoulder blocks Ryan and is met with a discus punch from Morgan to cause the quick disqualification. Morgan also nails Chavo Guerrero Jr. with the Carbon Footprint! Angle advancement, folks.
Backstage, Kurt Angle thanks Wes Brisco and Garrett Bischoff for having his back. Samoa Joe tells them they don’t need their help. Angle says no one is coming in and nobody is coming out because it’s a cage match. Angle is going to unmask every member of Aces and Eights.
Hulk Hogan comes out and apologizes for not being here last week because he saw Bully Ray kissing his daughter, Brooke Hogan. He calls out Bully and Brooke to the ring. Hogan tells Ray that there is a brother of the road code and Ray should have told him what was going on. Bully admits that he should have told Hulk. Hulk tells Bully that he doesn’t belong in the business and twenty years ago one of them would have been gone from the business when they went to war. Hulk announces that Bully has been suspended indefinitely without pay and Hulk knows that Brooke has made her decision. Bully and Brooke leave the ring together.
Joseph Park is still training at OVW. He gets his blessing from Danny Davis.
Fourth Contest: Gail Kim & TNA Knockouts Champion Tara vs. Mickie James & Brooke Tessmacher
Pardon me, but I’m simply never been a fan of female wrestling. That, and this apparently got thirteen minutes of air time. That’s just way too much for my brain to handle. So, to give this the short story treatment, Mickie James got the win after hitting a DDT on Gail Kim. That’s it.
Backstage, DOC is pissed that Kurt Angle is trying to unmask them. DOC says they need to keep their masks on. The leader agrees and says they need to protect their masks with their lives.
Backstage, ODB says that Aces and Eights has done a lot of damage. Her husband Eric Young is recovering at home. ODB knows that he will be back and she will be by his side.
Backstage, Austin Aries and Bobby Roode are yelling at Hulk Hogan over the match at Genesis. Hogan says the match will be the elimination match. Hogan announces that Aries and Roode will team up against Hardy and a partner of his choice next week.
Main Event: Kurt Angle & Samoa Joe vs. TNA Television Champion Devon & Masked Aces & Eights Member
This is a steel cage match. DOC attacks Angle before he enters the ring and locks the cage leaving Joe in the cage by himself. DOC rams Angle head first into the steps and Joe is fighting off both men in the ring. Devon accidentally splashes his partner in the corner. Joe nails Devon with a kick and tries to get the lock off but he can’t. Devon is clotheslined by his partner on accident. Devon cuts Joe off with a Pounce! Joe is beaten up by the Aces and Eights for a few moments. Angle is trying to rip the door off but Devon kicks the door into Angle’s face as we go to commercial.
Joe fights back with a series of overhead suplexs. Angle begins to climb the cage but DOC is back. Angle low blows DOC and just grabs the key to open the door to help Joe. Angle enters and clotheslines Devon several times. Angle hits a missile dropkick off the middle rope on the masked man. Angle tries to rip the mask off but DOC distracts Angle and slams the door on his head again. Joe knocks DOC off the steps and is attacked by the Aces and Eights again. Angle has been busted wide open. Devon splashes Angle in the corner and the masked guy hit a side slam. Devon misses a top rope diving head butt. Joe drops the masked man with a big boot. Angle hits a few German suplexs on Devon. Devon gets rammed into the cage a couple of times. Angle hits the Angle Slam on the masked man to win the match.
Your Winners: Kurt Angle & Samoa Joe
Match Rating: *1/2. A rather boring main event that saw Aces and Eights fail to get a big win. It was just a predictable match that just didn’t have a lot of energy to it.
After the match, Angle tries to get the mask off but DOC attacks Joe and Angle from behind. The rest of the Aces and Eights members enter the cage and attack Angle and Joe. Mr. Anderson is on the floor just watching the beat down. Sting walks down to the ring without any music and just cleans house with his baseball bat. DOC backs off from Sting and leaves the cage. One masked man is trapped in the ring. They rip the mask off and it’s Mike Knox from the WWE! That’s what Tenay said. Why acknowledge that? The faces stand tall to end the show.
Final Thoughts:
Well, this show wasn’t exciting or fun. It felt flat. The return of Sting was anticlimactic. They didn’t bother to play his music, so sitting at home it was just blah. The cage match was lackluster. The Aces and Eights continue to fail at winning important matches. Mike Knox as a member is whatever. He never amounted to anything in WWE. So, the group just looks weak. A bad show to kick off 2013 for TNA.
Thanks for reading.
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Bob Colling Jr. View All
34-year-old currently living in Syracuse, New York. Long-time fan of the New York Mets, Chicago Bulls, and Minnesota Vikings. An avid fan of professional wrestling and write reviews/articles on the product. Usually focusing on old-school wrestling.