Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
HHH and Steph are in the Christmas spirit, lounging on a coach surrounded by sycophants. Stephanie sure does have some long legs! They have presents. The sycophants are the Posse. No one in the WWF are giving so they will start the giving tonight. Rodney agrees and is told to shut up.
Match 1: Test v. New Age Outlaws
Test is wearing a protective cover over his face! Classic. Handicap match. Test attacks Road Dogg in the middle of his speech. It does not last and he is assaulted. The Hardys and Edge and Christian are watching in the back and not liking what they are seeing….Test getting pummeled. Test finally fights back and takes both down. He nails both with a big boot and powerbombs Ass. Meltdown on Dogg but Ass dropkicks him down and Dogg gets two. Now back to the ass kicking of Test. They take off the protective cover and Ass finishes him with the Famouser.
*1/2 Angle advancement.
HHH and Steph are giggling.
Edge and Christian and the Hardys are brought in to HHH and Steph. They do not like fighting each other. Steph whispers to HHH and he is making a match. He mixes up the teams.
HHH and Steph want Angle to step up to the next level. Therefore he will face Viscera. Steph is not too happy about that.
Match 2: Jeff Hardy and Christan v. Edge and Matt Hardy
All four go at it. Two Outsider Edges by Edge and Matt Hardy. Now Jeff is spiked by a DDT and Matt flies into Jeff and gets two. They fly around the ring for about three more minutes. Jeff swanton’s down to stop a pin and then pins his brother via one.
**1/2 Pretty good.
More Steph and HHH. Moolah and Mae are brought in. They talk about how they are family. HHH teases Mae with liquor but has another idea. HHH is giving them a chance to shine like never before in a triple threat against the Dudley Boyz and Acolytes. Moolah calls them names. They have a gift for JR and get up….
After the break they head to the ring. JR is called up to the ring. HHH yells at the crowd to shut up. Steph is talking about Entertainment Weekly and how the WWF was ranked number five. Steph thinks they are the big entertainers. HHH has the mic and he talks about the fans not having the Christmas spirit and some more EW. Now to basically calling Steph a bitch last week. Steph knows that JR did not want to hurt her feelings in a mocking tone. She loved slapping him and HHH gets behind him and is on his knees as she pushes him over. HHH is going for the arm but here comes Mankind. He has had enough of HHH picking on people and wants HHH to pick on someone his own size. He calls their Era crap. He calls her a ho and Steph has to hold HHH back and he mocks her for that. HHH has an idea and the fans call him an idea. It is taking HHH an hour to spit it out. HHH tells him that he will be in a Boiler Room Match. Mankind assures HHH that he has been good all year and wants to fight him. Steph grabs the mic and she slaps him after saying Merry Christmas.
Match 3: Kurt Angle v. Viscera
The Olympic Hero wishes everyone a Merry Christmas. He has a NY Resolution for everyone and he brags about his success in the WWF and elsewhere. He discusses the Three I’s and they will help the crowd accomplish anything they want.
Viscera shoves him down and then bulldogs him. He tosses him and starts to hammer him in the corner but Angle fights back only to be run pillar to post and crushed with a Samoan Drop. Viscera misses a rolling kick and is dropkicked twice. Angle finally drops him with a missile kick. Here comes Blackman. He wallops Viscera with a Kendo stick and Angle barely gets up and wins with his Slam.
Steph is talking about how cute Angle is and HHH is not too happy.
Mae and Moolah are prepping for their match.
Here comes Dudleys and Acolytes….walking in the back.
Match 4: Mae and Moolah v. Acolytes v. Dudely Boyz
Dudleys talk about the Commandments and then get in the ring and lay waste to the old bags. Mark Henry is sad, watching in the back. Acolytes come out and now the fight is on. They fight on the floor and in the ring. Dudley Nut Drop on Mae Young! Match is over.
** For the Nut Drop!
Stephanie is given a present from HHH and it is a Santa Claus.
This is who Mankind will face tonight. He is fine with that. The Posse attack and shove him into the Boiler Room. Mankind is embarrassed for getting beat up by the Posse. Mankind goes up to Santa and does not want to kick his ass. He is explaining the rules and he is allowing Santa to walk. Now three Santa’s attack him and the fight is on. Mankind has a garbage can and places over the head of one and whacks him over and over. Now a frying pan takes another out. Now two more are there and they attack. Mankind takes them out. But, it is the Outlaws, and they overwhelm him and backdrop him into the table. But Mankind whips one into the wall and the other into some pipes. Mankind has a plate glass and Road Dogg has a bag of presents and hits it back into his face and nails him with it a few times. Sorry it was HHH and he escapes and gets the win.
** Not a bad brawl.
Al Snow demands a match with the Rock. HHH agrees.
Match 5: Godfather v. Chris Jericho (c) for WWF IC Title
Godfather runs him down but Jericho fires back only to be sent into the ropes and reeled with a back elbow. Jericho counters by tossing him over the top rope. They go at it down there and Jericho is backdropped on the floor. Back in the ring Godfather slams him and has the arm and thrust kicks him in the head. Fuck, here comes Chyna. Godfather runs into some boots but he is knocked down again. The Ho’s are on the apron and Chyna nuts Godfather and Jericho wins.
*1/2 Another shitty angle for Jericho.
HHH and Steph are talking to BB and Terri about a match. Some sort of gown match or topless thing. Missed some of it. But Steph punched HHH in the shoulder.
Match 6: Val Venis (c) v. Hardcore Holly for WWF European Title
It is some sort of top rope topless match. The first person tossed over the top rope one of the ladies have to take off an article of clothing….Terri and BB. Boy BB is not a pretty lady. Val talks about plugging in women like a Christmas tree and lighting them up.
Both start brawling and go to the floor. HHH is out and demands they take off their dresses. The ladies. THey are reluctant and HHH threatens their job. They comply.
Back to the fight and they are slugging away. Hardcore is shoved back and Val is nearly tossed over. Holly slides down and out and pulls Val off and tosses him over the barrier. Terri is excused and BB has to remove her top. She does so and HHH blocks it from everyone, screaming how great her breasts are. Val is not happy. I guess this is not for the title….
Match 7: Al Snow v. Rock
Brahma Bull Match:
Fans are literally going apeshit for the Rock! WWF is in Houston. Um, WCW is there next week. Great timing dumbasses. Rock makes fun of Al and is going to whip his monkey ass all over Houston.
Al charges and gets pummeled and knocked over the top rope. Al though gains the upperhand and just unloads on the Rock. He hammers him with the rope and uses it to choke him out. Rock tosses him over his back but off the reversal he is dropped via a back elbow. Al goes up and is choking him out and he is tossed over the top rope. Rock is punching him in the head over and over in the corner. Al takes out the ref and then the Rock decks him as Al holds him. Rock is knocked out with the cowbell. Rock though crushes him with a Rock Bottom. Here comes the Outlaws and they are taken out. Spinebuster on Al. He goes for the Elbow but is hit with a chair by Dogg. Al is too slow to cover. Rock gets his shoulder up. Road Dogg eats a Rock Bottom but Al gets the win thanks to a Famouser from Ass.
** What an absolute cluster of an ending.
Posse are all excited and spill something on HHH who is not too happy. Tori comes in with her man hair and giant biceps. Kane is fighting Big Show and she is happy. If Kane loses she gets to spend the Holidays with X Pac.
Match 8: Posse v. Too Cool
Rikishi is involved too. The Posse attack him and Too Cool make the save. Posse get the upperhand and Scotty is back suplexed. But they fight back and Rikishi sits on one of the Posse and gets the win.
*1/2 Posse? Really?
Too Cool dances.
HHH and Steph giggling and talking…
Match 9: Kane v. Big Show (c) for WWF Title
Kane staggers Show with big clubbing blows but is grabbed and taken down with a Russian sweep. He drops the elbow and gets two. They slug it out until Show is knocked to the floor with an enzuguri. Kane goes up top and nails him with a top rope lariat. HHH and Steph are snuggling on a chair on the ramp watching….Show drops him throat first onto the barrier but is shoved into the post. Show hits Kane with a chair. DQ. But HHH orders the match continued. Show goozles him but is kicked in the nuts and uppercuts him. They fight into the crowd. Countout. Steph says nope…continues. Show is backdropped over the barrier. Kane is on top of it and strikes with another clothesline. Show gets two after a powerslam. They go back and forth and Kane is flung into the steps and hammered with fists and elbows. Of course Tori mucks it all up. More manly than Kane, though I swear I hypocritically claimed she was hot a week or so ago! Whatever, I can change my mind. Show powerbombs Kane through the announce table and wins.
*** Good brawl.
HHH wishes everyone a very RAW Christmas as Tori is carried off.
*** Not a bad show. It worked the angles and had some okay wrestling. Nothing great but the Helmsley Era is off for better or worse. Now to give Angle a good feud….I guess they are as Steph is apparently smitten with him. Jericho needs something to do. Show had a great match but is still useless as champ.