WWF House Show 3/8/1986

Written by: Matt Peddycord

Boston Garden
March 8, 1986
Boston, MA

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon & Lord Alfred Hayes. Jesse Ventura is away on a special assignment!

• Rene Goulet vs. Sivi Afi
  

Sivi Afi was a lower mid card guy at best in the WWF for a few years in the late ’80s. Since then, he’s converted to Christianity and he’s now a minister in Ohio. Pretty awesome. While he was trained by Peter Maivia, he’s actually one of the few Samoan wrestlers from the WWF that doesn’t hang around in the Maivia family tree. The “#1 Frenchman” Rene Goulet is one of Vince’s most well known right hand men that is well into his enhancement talent days by 1986. He’s quite the master of crowd psychology. They work off a headlock for the majority of the match with Sivi Afi in control. Goulet buries a knee to stop it and works the ribs. He wears that EVIL LOADED BLACK GLOVE and sets up for the CLAWHOLD. Sivi Afi’s shoulders are pinned to the mat, but the ref is too dumb to count. Goulet shuts down a comeback with a boot out of the corner. He lowers the boom for two. Back to the CLAWHOLD again. Double KO ensues. Now Sivi gets that blood boiling and a diving headbutt gets two. Flying bodypress gets the three-count for Sivi. (11:08) Pretty formulaic stuff. Goulet’s mobility really suffers to take those high risk moves. *

• Jake Roberts vs. Jose Luis Rivera

This is probably the earliest WWF match I’ve seen of Jake Roberts. As for Rivera, he’s one of the original masked Los Conquistadors in the late ’80s. Pretty much like the last match – the star works a wear down hold for the majority of the match. Jake misses two elbow drops which gives Rivera the chance to twist on the arm. Jake reaches for his snake bag, but can’t get to it. Whoa! You can tell Jake is already getting into this “snake” character. Short-arm clothesline stops Rivera dead in his tracks. A knee lift doesn’t do Rivera any favors either. Instead of going for the kill, Jake returns to a chinlock and cheats a bit with that. Crowd starts to yell ‘boring’, so Jake puts Rivera away with the DDT. (10:33) Jake wants to whip out his snake, but the ref refuses. Great example into the character of Jake Roberts if nothing else. *

• The Crush Gals vs. Judy Martin & Donna Christianello

It’s the World Famous Crush Gals from Japan! Considering by many as the greatest women’s tag team ever, they are Lioness Asuka and Chigusa Nagayo. Incredibly unattractive, in fact they look like teenage boys, but they can GO. I wonder how they will fair against trailer park trash like Martin and Christianello. They spend a lot of time at the start trying to figure out the Crush Gals – particularly Nagayo. In comes Asuka, she kicks Martin to the floor. Back inside, Lioness surprises Judy with a Jack Brisco rollup. Judy and Donna do an illegal switch, but Lioness breaks away for a tag. Like the evil trash they are, Judy and Donna cut the ring in half on Chigusa with dirty tricks. Hot tag to Lioness, she starts off with a running dropkick to Martin. Chigusa tags back in for a flying elbow drop and hooks on the Sharpshooter. Judy makes the ropes and there’s actually some BABYFACE miscommunication as Lioness decks Nagayo with a flying clothesline. Doesn’t really bother them though as they continue to dominate Judy. She finally has enough and kicks Lioness away. Tag to Christianello. Lioness gives her the Giant Swing and gets the three-count.(15:37) A little disappointing considering their track record, but the Crush Gals probably did the best they could with the team they had to work with here. **

• Jim Neidhart (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Scott McGhee

Hey Scott. 1983 called. It wants its ‘Synchronicity’ jacket back. I guess its still better than say wearing a “Whitney Houston” jacket to the ring. Basically Neidhart pushes McGhee around while Jimmy acts annoying at ringside. He’s got a new megaphone! McGhee gets in a few shots, but Neidhart catches him with a POWERSLAM for the 1-2-3. (5:59)Really just an extended squash. ½*

• Ricky Steamboat vs. Bret Hart (w/Jimmy Hart)

YO! BUM RUSH THE SHOW! Bret attacks to start before Steamboat even takes off his jacket. Steamboat reverses a whip and send Bret in chest-first and points the finger. YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Jimmy distracts Ricky a little bit with his megaphone, but Steamboat stays on Bret with an armbar. He tries dislocating an elbow with a hammerlock. An armdrag gets Bret stuck back in the armbar. They work off that for a while. Bret catches Steamboat with a swinging neckbreaker to slow down the Dragon. Steamboat takes a spill out to the floor and Bret brings him back inside with a suplex for two. Splash from Steamboat hits knees. We go to the floor again as Bret gives Ricky a slam on the floor. Back in, a running powerslam gets two. Backbreaker hits, but the elbow drop off the second rope does not. Steamboat fights back with the KA-RA-TE! Back suplex gets two. Steamboat gets a little pissed off beating on in the corner and nearly tosses the ref away. Bret reverses a whip and sends him into the ref. He covers, but yeah the ref is down, bro. Bret wakes the ref up and whips Steamboat in for a crossbody block, but Steamboat rolls through for the 1-2-3. (15:08) Easily the best worked match of the night, but I can’t help feeling like they couldn’t tell a better story together. Word on the street is that Bret was supposed to be Steamboat’s opponent at WrestleMania 2, but they decided to stick him with Hercules instead for whatever crazy reason. ***¼

• WWF Intercontinental Champion Randy Savage (w/Elizabeth) vs. Tito Santana

Rematch from the month before where Savage STOLE the IC belt from Santana. Of course, Santana is fired up for this one. Good to see Liz out here, because Judy and Donna made me sad. Savage plays his Memphis role quite nicely by ducking in and out of the ring on Tito. He finally has enough and catches Savage for a SEVERE beating. Atomic drop takes Savage to the floor. Back in, the crowd starts chanting Tito while he kicks at the knee. As Savage grows desperate, he decides to yank Santana to the floor. Back in again, Savage takes over and drops a double ax handle for two. Santana atomic drops out of the corner and fires back on Savage. FLYING FOREARM and an elbow drop gets 1-2-NO! Savage slips out on the FIGURE FOUR and reaches into his trunks, but Tito throws him back into the ring before he can slip on the foreign object. With Savage in the ropes and ref Danny Davis trying to separate the two, Tito shoves Danny Davis away for the DQ. (7:17) Not a bad finish considering how angry Santana should be at Savage. Sometimes that Tito is his own worst enemy. Plus with Danny Davis, it’s just another step towards his eventual suspension and becoming a most hated wrestler. **¼

• Bull Nakano & Dump Mastumoto vs. Velvet McIntyre & Dawn Marie

Just for the sake of saying it, this is not the Dawn Marie from ECW. The only thing they have in common is a Y chromosome. Bull Nakano just looks like a punk rocker chick here as opposed to her more classic ‘finger in the light socket’ look we see in the ’90s. Interesting that the AJW promotion sent the WWF two of their best teams in 1986. Of course we can’t forget the Jumping Bomb Angels who appear on a couple WWF shows in future years. The Japanese Devils control for the majority of the match until Velvet delivers a victory roll out of nowhere and gets the three count on Nakano. (8:27) We’ll see you in about eight years, Bull. *½

• Cpl. Kirschner vs. Iron Mike Sharpe

It’s the US vs. Canada’s greatest athlete. USA! USA! USA! Boy, Kirschner is excited. Monkey flip and three dropkicks send Sharpe to the floor as he turns over the ringside barricade. WE’RE HAVING FUN! Back inside, Sharpe grabs a chinlock while Monsoon and Hayes discuss WrestleMania 2. That Hogan-Bundy cage match will be super reinforced! Kirschner teases a stomp to the balls and then decides against it. BOO! Sharpe wants a test of strength and nobody thinks that’s a good idea. Kirschner takes some boots and then returns the favor tenfold. Monsoon mentions Sharpe being the cleanest guy in the WWF. One time he was on the third match on the card and after the show was over and the building was locked up, he was still in the shower. I distinctly remember hearing a joke about this on thePsych episode John Cena guest starred on, but I still don’t know what they’re talking about. Anyways, things pick up as Sharpe tosses Kirschner through one of the wooden ringside barricades. YOU’RE HARDCORE! YOU’RE HARDCORE! Back in the ring, Kirschner mounts a comeback and fails with a missed dropkick. Now Sharpe sticks an object down into his forearm brace. This could be trouble. Kirschner blocks the loaded blow and KNOCKS OUT SHARPE WITH HIS OWN LOADED FOREARM! Hilarious. Kirschner covers Sharpe for the win. (9:56) Actually not that bad with Sharpe being kind of awesome in this match with a somewhat tongue-in-cheek finish. **

• Barry O vs. Ted Arcidi

Arcidi is this years “World’s Strongest Man”. Barry O is Cowboy Bob Orton’s brother who thinks he’s from Las Vegas. In real life, he was one of the more outspoken ex WWF wrestlers concerning the sex scandals in the early 90s – most specifically during Vince’s appearance on the Phil Donahue show. This should be a short squash and I am right as Arcidi slaps on the BEARHUG for the submission. (3:13) The main event is coming up next! ¼*

• Hulk Hogan & Junkyard Dog vs. Terry & Hoss Funk (w/Jimmy Hart)

Have I ever said how much I love watching Terry Funk? Wasn’t Hulk out of wrestling after the SNME where Bundy squashed him in the corner until the cage match at WrestleMania? Guess not. JYD and Hogan clean house to start. Terry can’t headbutt JYD and takes a ten-count turnbuckle smash for his troubles. Tag to Hoss, he and JYD try a criss-cross and JYD makes him look dumb for it. Hogan tags in and grabs a headlock on Hoss. JYD softens the blow in the corner off a whip for Hulk. Terry tries the same for Hoss and it backfires. TERRY IS SO CRAZY. Hoss can’t slam Hogan, but Hogan can slam the Funks. Finally, Hulk gets dumped out by Hoss so that Terry can smash and jab the taped ribs. Back inside, the Funks stalk Hogan as they hammer the ribs. Hogan fires back and hot tags JYD. Big clothesline to Terry, but he avoids a diving headbutt. Tag to Hoss, he drills JYD with several lifters. JYD hits a desperate back suplex on Terry. He tries to headbutt JYD again, which proves futile. Hot tag to Hulk, too bad Hoss attacks the ribs from behind. Terry chokes on Hogan with some wrist tape. False tag spot to JYD. He comes in anyway and flips Jimmy Hart into the ring. While the ref is arguing with him, Terry hangs JYD with his bullrope until Hogan runs in and clotheslines Terry away for the 1-2-3. (11:32) AXE BOMBER! Huge pop for Hogan. The man was truly untouchable here. Of course, a wild brawl thanks to Terry Funk. **½

Gorilla Monsoon and Lord Alfred Hayes close out the show. Don’t forget – WrestleMania 2! April 7! Watch it!

Final Thoughts: An interesting show with the All Japan Women making a rare appearance in the ’80s. Of course then there’s the interesting Steamboat-Bret match that you can see on the Bret DVD and then there’s the fun main event which is worth a look for the Funk fans. The Boston Gardens seem to be quite good, but it’s still a house show and as with most WWF house shows, be ready to fast forward past some generic stuff. I tried finding a good house show from the WWEClassics collection and this one hovers over the ‘thumbs in the middle’ level.