Written by: Scrooge McSuck from Da Wrestling Site
– Another show I didn’t see “as it happened”, but judging by the looks of it, this looks like an unimpressive broadcast, according to the match list at least. For those with a weak memory, the concept of the Survivor Series was drastically altered for the 1992 edition. Instead of featuring the tradtional elimination matches, we were given a card that was pretty much the Thanksgiving edition of SummerSlam, with the emphasis being on traditional singles and tag team matches. Other than probably declining buyrates, I’d also factor in a very odd cast of characters on the roster making Elimination matches impossible to center the show around. Seriously, how would YOU work guys like Nailz, Repo Man, Papa Shango, the Berzerker, Kamala, Max Moon, and a host of others into such an environment? You can’t, so we got this card instead, and much like the PPV, the concept of the Showdown special has changed as well, no longer focusing on matches that paired up opposing team members, but acting more as a teaser to the show like the WrestleMania or SummerSlam lead-ins instead.
– We open the show with a promo from Razor Ramon and Ric Flair. They have words for Randy Savage, who manipulated Mr. Perfect into turning his back on Flair and Ramon. As I said before in another review, it was more “Perfect out to prove people wrong that he isn’t washed up” rather than “Perfect feeling bad and wanting to help Savage out”, but eventually they just made him a typical babyface. Again, the short story: Warrior was let go from his contract days before the PPV, they did an angle on Primetime Wrestling turning Mr. Perfect face and bringing him out of retirement, and now the PPV will be co-headlined by the tag match of Savage and Perfect vs. Ramon and Flair.
– Our hosts for the evening and calling all the action is the magnificent duo of Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby “The Brain” Heenan. Heenan is still rather irritated at Mr. Perfect for his new-found allegiance with Randy Savage. I don’t understand how the WWF dropped the ball with Mr. Perfect. I know he wasn’t a great babyface, but it seemed like for all of 1993, they just set him up to be a big loser, except for the notable match with Ric Flair on Monday Night Raw.
Tatanka vs. Repo Man:
What a match to open the show with. Tatanka was STILL doing a program with the Model, Rick Martel, over some stolen feathers. Another line I’ve said before, but was their epic match at WrestleMania VIII so good that there had to be an angle developed between the two afterwards, that ran the course of the entire summer and fall of 1992? Repo Man was just a JTTS at this point. Sadly, this match was recycled on the Coliseum Video “Invasion of the Bodyslammers”, but with new commentary. Lockup into the corner, and Tatanka with a clean break. Repo Man pulls the hair, but gives a clean break, too. Repo with a boot to the midsection, followed by rights. Irish whip, and Tatanka takes him over with a hip toss, then connects with a pair of dropkicks. Irish whip, and Repo ducks out of the ring for a breather. We get an insert promo from The Model. Back in the ring, and Tatanka works a wristlock. Tatanka sweeps the leg and applies a hammerlock. Irish whip, and Tatanka wiyh a shoulder block, followed by a cross body. Tatanka with an arm drag, then slaps on an armbar, or as I will call it from now on, the Ricky Steamboat Special™. Repo escapaes with a knee to the midsection, but gets rolled up for a two count. Tatanka continues working the arm and goes back to the armbar. Tatanka chops away in the corner, but misses a second rope cross body. Repo hammers away and applies an armbar. Tatanka dances around the ring, but Repo yanks him back down by the hair. Tatanka escapes and surprises Repo with a tomahawk chop to the forehead. Repo to the second turnbuckle, and he gets a fist to the midsection. Irish whip, and Tatanka with more chops, followed by a clothesline. Heenan says it’s the first time he’s seen Tonto kick the butt of the Lone Ranger. Tatanka with a slam, then off the top rope with a big chop for a two count. Irish whip is reversed, and Tatanka fails at a roll up attempt. Tatanka ducks a clothesline and nails the Papoose to Go for the three count at 7:44. Not the worst match I’ve ever seen, but it was basically a squash match for Tatanka, with very minimal, very token offense from the Repo Man.
– We take a look at what happened on PrimeTime Wrestling last Monday night. Live from WWFB in Sarasota, FL (or another studio in wherever the WWF was taping from), Randy Savage says he wants Mr. Perfect to be his partner. Everyone thinks it’s a joke, but gradually things changed over the course of the show, and Perfect accepts. Heenan responds by bitch slapping Perfect hard enough to mess up his hair. Perfect does the Ken Patera shtick, and dumps a pitcher of water on him and calls Heenan a Weasel, solidifying things. We throw it to Mean Gene, who is with Macho Man and Mr. Perfect. Perfect is out to prove he’s a better man than Ric Flair. It’s a real shame knowing both of these guys are no longer with us.
Marty Jannetty vs. The Brooklyn Brawler:
Okay, now what the hell is the reason for this being on the show hyping the PPV? Marty Jannetty is fresh from a firing/suspension over some sort of legal issues, but he not only wasn’t on the PPV, he wasn’t even mentioned once during the damn thing, because his program partner was involved in the Main Event, and they weren’t going to waste their breath talking about friggin’ Marty Jannetty during it. The Brawler is actually wearing a shirt that says “Brooklyn” on it. Lockup, and Brawler pulls the hair to throw Jannetty to the canvas. We see some goofy looking Clown hanging around in the front row. Brawler controls the action, but takes an elbow to the side of the head. One thing that bothered me about the whole “Jannetty was injured and never seen again and is lucky to be wrestling” angle… Jannetty was still working cards as late as the middle of February, and the Barber Shop incident happened the first week of the new year. I know, it’s insignificant, but it’s revised history again. Irish whip is reversed and Jannetty with an arm drag. The clown must’ve been new still, since Heenan makes fun of him like he’s a babyface. Shoving match, and Jannetty with the Ricky Steamboat Special™. Brawler counters into a wristlock, but Jannetty counters that with an arm drag. Brawler rakes the eyes and boots Jannetty out of the ring. Jannetty hangs Brawler up across the top rope, slides in between the legs, and does a victory roll for a two count. Another Ricky Steamboat Special™ from Jannetty, but Brawler thumbs the eyes. Irish whip, and Jannetty with a powerslam, followed by the crescent kick. Jannetty with a hurricanrana, then to the top rope for a flying fist drop for the three count at 4:58. A little too long for a squash match, but I guess it’s not too much of a surprise to see them give a more established Jobber some offense on these shows.
[Note: This is where the show originally featured a rebroadcasting of Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog for the Intercontinental Title, from last weeks Saturday Night’s Main Event. It was very special, too, with new commentary with Monsoon, Heenan, and Michaels giving insight over his victory. Sorry for the exclusion from this copy, but if you need to know my opinion, it was a good match with a well done finish.]
Kamala (w/ Harvey Wippleman & Kimchee) vs. Red Tyler:
Yay, another Kamala squash. Kamala is set to face the Undertaker at the Survivor Series in a Coffin Match. I don’t know how the rules were at this time, but I do remember at the PPV that the Undertaker pinned Kamala, THEN put him in the coffin/casket. From every match on, it was just “put him in, close the lid.” Kamala quickly works over Tyler with chops. Kamala drops Tyler across the top rope, then chokes away. Whip to the corner, followed by some more generic fat-man offense. Kamala chokes Tyler some more, as Heenan describes a match that Kamala would like, involving a black cauldron. Can’t forget the zuchini. Kamala slaps his belly, and “it’s time for num-nums!”. Irish whip, and Kamala with a spinning kick, about as ugly as what Nikolai Volkoff would do. Kamala goes for a cover, but doesn’t know how to pin people. You’d think after 12 years he would’ve learned… Kamala with a throat thrust and a splash, and that eventually gets three at 3:28. Blech… I really, really hate watching Kamala matches. I honestly can’t name a worse wrestler who maintained such a long career.
– We go to the private workshop of the Undertaker, who’s bust constructing a coffin for Kamala, and judging by the set, it’s what the construction crew for Back To The Future Part III forgot to demolish. Paul Bearer talks in his usual creepy manner while the Undertaker maintains a slow, steady work place. Bearer describing maggots enterting the casket to “devour your rotting flesh” is a little bit too much for me. We get clips from the November 2nd episode of Primetime Wrestling. Kamala was in action against Tatanka when Paul Bearer brought a generic coffin to ringside, and inside of course lays the Undertaker, who scares Kamala shitless. That would’ve freaked me out too. Undertaker then closes the lid on himself. Weirdo.
Earthquake vs. Irwin R. Schyster (Tag Team Champ) (w/ Jimmy Hart):
Oh my word, these two will be on opposite sides at the Survivor Series in a lame attempt at putting an elimination style match on the card, but it fell under the rules more like a 2 out of 3 Falls Match rather than the usual Survivor Series style. The Nasties were a late substitution for the Bushwhackers, and no, I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not. Money Inc. had very recently regained the titles, on an episode of Wrestling Challenge no less. That show NEVER featured a title change before, or ever again after. Lockup, and I.R.S. goes for a hammerlock, but Quake throws him down. They do it again, this time I.R.S. claims hair pulling. Quake grabs a headlock, then plows through Irwin with a shoulder tackle. Quake threatens Jimmy Hart, allowing I.R.S. to attack from behind. Irish whip is reversed, and Quake nails I.R.S. with a trio of clotheslines. Lockup into the corner, and Quake with an avalanche. I.R.S. boots him on a second attempt, then jumps on for a sleeper hold. Quake quickly escapes, but I.R.S. is nothing but persistant. Irish whip is reversed, and Quake catches Irwin in a bearhug. I.R.S. fights free, but Quake sends him over the top following an atomic drop. Ted Dibiase makes his way to the ring while Quake continues dominating. We return from commercial, and Typhoon is now at ringside. Irish whip is reversed, and Quake connects with an elbow. Quake winds up and misses an elbow drop. I.R.S. drops a leg across the midsection, then slaps on a chinlock. Yes, he does use the ropes for leverage. I.R.S. with a series of elbow drops for a two count, then goes back to the chinlock. Quake escapes with elbows to the midsection, then ducks a clothesline, sending I.R.S. over the top rope. Same spot used in the ’93 Royal Rumble between the two. Back inside, and Quake hammers away. Whip to the corner, and Quake stands on the hand of I.R.S. to prevent him from leaving the ring. Whip to the opposite side, and Quake misses a charge. I.R.S. to the top, and he eats boot on the way down. Irish whip, and Quake with a clothesline, followed by a big elbow. Earthquake does his routine, but gets tripped by Dibiase, drawing a Disqualification at 11:11. Lame! After the match, I.R.S. works Quake over until Typhoon chaes him away. That long for that finish? Are you shitting me? Just a long, boring match. Quake is selling some major eye damage, but that was a non-factor by the PPV.
– Mean Gene Okerlund is backstage with the team(s) of Money Inc. and theBeverly Brothers, as well as their managers Jimmy Hart and the Genius. Ted Dibiase makes fun of injuring Earthquake’s eye, and again, this was a total non-factor for the match at the Survivor Series. Seriously, the entire point of this interview is making blind jokes. So, so lame.
Big Boss Man vs. Barry Horowitz:
The Boss Man is going to face Nailz at the Survivor Series, in a “Nightstick Match.” Basically, a nightstick is suspended above the ring on a pole in the corner, first man to grab it can use it. But what if the guy who doesn’t grab it uses it? Is it illegal for him? The fans must know! We do a recap of the feud, which kicked off on the May 30th edition of SuperStars, when Nailz beat the crap out of Boss Man. Horowitz surprises Boss Man with a drop toe hold, but Boss Man grabs a hammerlock. Horowitz counters, then Boss Man counters back. Irish whip, and Boss Man with a shoulder block, followed by stomping of the hand. Insert promos from the Boss Man while there’s a delay in the “action.” Lockup, and Boss Man grabs a headlock. Irish whip attempt, but Boss Man with a handful of hair to break the momentum. Whip to the corner, but Boss Man misses a charge. Horowitz works the arm with his token offense. Irish whip is reversed, and the Boss Man Slam finishes things off at 3:28. Just a regular squash. Nothing fun to say about it either way.
– We throw it to a pre-taped promo from Nailz, who is hanging around in a ring with the pole and nightstick already set up. Nailz promises to finish the job and to show the Boss Man what it’s like to serve hard time. Seriously, is that the guys real voice? He sounds like he swallowed a toad and it died in there.
– It’s time for the Survivor Series Report, brought to us by Sean Mooney. It’s going to be this Wednesday Night on Thanksgiving Eve! We get promos from… no one. That’s very odd, but I guess someone realized it wasn’t necessary, since the entire show is just one long commercial for the PPV. The entire card has been announced, and Mooney runs it down, as followed…
- WWF Champion Bret Hart defends his title against Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels
- The Perfect Team of Randy Savage and Mr. Perfect go up against the team of Ric Flair and Razor Ramon
- The Undertaker takes on Kamala in a Coffin Match
- The Natural Disasters and the Nasty Boys team up to face Tag ChampionsMoney Inc. and the Beverly Brothers in an Elimination Match of Survival
- Big Boss Man squares off against Nailz in a Nightstick Match
- Tatanka goes one-on-one with the Model, Rick Martel
- New matches signed!
- The team of High Energy faces the Headshrinkers
- Yokozuna has signed an Open Contract to face anyone in the WWF
– Mean Gene Okerlund is standing by with Ric Flair and Razor Ramon. They’re going to get revenge against Mr. Perfect for standing everyone in the back. Ramon’s poor man Scarface imitation never really did it for me. Flair does his usual crazy-eyed promo that he did more often than not during his WWF tenure. He’s more obsessed with Mr. Perfect, which makes it odd how much of a non-factor Randy Savage seemed to be now that the match no longer featured the Warrior as his partner.
The Headshrinkers (w/ Afa) vs. Randy Fox & Royce Royal:
This is fairly early in the run for the Head Shrinkers, consisting of course, of Samu and Fatu. They have some stupid props that were gradually phased out for being lame and unnecessary. “Shawn Michaels has left the building.” The Shrinkers attack and work over both men. Royal gets tossed out and they double press Fox into the air. We see that the Clown is hanging around ringside again. Samu wipes out Fox with a chop, then slams him face-first into the canvas. Samu with a gutwrench slam and a bitch slap. Double headbutt, and Fatu covers for a two count. Fatu with some biting, then picks his nose and feeds it to Fox. Ew?! Fatu slams Fox into the corner, then knocks Royal out with a crescent kick. Irish whip, and Fatu with a powerslam. The Shrinkers with a double face slam on Royal, and the top rope splash from Fatu finishes things off at 3:22. Surprisingly fun match, mainly because the Headshrinkers really made things look painful, and I liked their double team stuff. It was their feature matches that stunk.
– Vince McMahon is hanging around with Bret “Hitman” Hart on location somewhere that isn’t mentioned. For whatever reason, we talk about SummerSlam, because that’s a factor in the upcoming match at Survivor Series, I guess. We tak about Bret losing, but then bouncing back and shocking the world by defeating Ric Flair for the WWF Championship in Saskatoon. That match never aired on television, but is available on Coliseum Video (Smack ’em, Whack ’em?). Bret has been a fighting champion, defending the belt against all comers for the past month or so. Sorry, but this is just way too long for what the purpose is. Hyping Bret Hart. It’s at the TEN MINUTE MARK he finally talks about Shawn Michaels and trying to put him over without saying he wants Shawn to beat him at the Survivor Series.
– Promotional consideration paid for by the following… WWF Figures, featuring the Hitman, The Bulldog, Sgt. Slaughter, and the Hulkster. Electronic Hot Shot Basketball with real arcade sounds! The Simpsons’ Krusty’s Funhouse, from Acclaim available on all Nintendo consoles!
– We go to the Undertaker’s workshop once more. The coffin is complete, and it’s just a giant box that is decorated with the body paintings of Kamala, or maybe someone was having a serious obsession for Lucky Charms at the times. Undertaker pops out of the coffin and finally starts talking after all the silence. Weirdo.
Final Thoughts: An underwhelming show for me. There’s only a couple of “feature matches”, and they both were underwhelming, to say the least, and a handful of pointless squash matches. There’s a lot of recapping what was going on leading up to the Survivor Series, but it doesn’t have to be the main point of a two hour broadcast, since most people watching this show had to have a little bit of knowledge of what was going on. Just a hard show to sit through, and glad that it’s over with.
31-year old currently living in Syracuse, New York. Longtime fan of the New York Mets, Chicago Bulls and Minnesota Vikings. Avid fan of professional wrestling and write reviews/articles on the product. Usually focusing on the old school wrestling.