Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
WWF lite! That is what Nitro is turning into. This is not to say that Nitro has not been entertaining. I love the focus on the young guys. But there is just too much going on. They have five hours of programming and can focus more on the bigger angles and on actual wrestling, something WCW cannot stray from if they want to keep their core audience. There is too much filler like the WWF with overlong and generally useless vignettes and promos. Also, I do not need to see them preparing for a match or walking in the back. Russo is trying to get everyone involved and that is laudatory but nigh impossible. Some guys will not get over and they need to narrow down the focus. Also bring back the Cruiserweight Division. Oh, and why are the Filthy Animals portrayed as thieves, the Mexicans anyway…..? Nitro went up to a near 3.3 and the first hour hit a 4.0 but again the final hour stayed below a 3. RAW in its go home show earned a 5.4 off a 5.1 and 5.6. I will also say that the arena’s have become darker and seemed to be more papered over the last month. In August and September there were some hot crowds, and while they have not really diminished the population in the arena has seems to be dipping.
Sid is screaming at an audio/visual dude in the back and demands that he put in a tape when he is told, no questions asked.
They are in the Conseco Field in Indianapolis and the crowd is actually decent. At least 2/3 full. Schiavone says it is capacity but the top section seems papered but there is at least 12000. I am rambling.
Sid has come out and he is not happy with the Outsiders and he is not stupid as he has the mind of a psychopath. But back to them later as he wants to focus on Goldberg. He never quit at Havoc. He claims Goldberg said it and they show it on the screen. Um, Sid is on his knees and he is clearly not quitting but okay….Sid continues that he is still the US champ and cue the Outsiders. Hall calls him Einstein and wonders if Sid is the champ then why is the belt down here and points at it. Hall beat him last week too. Sid screams that Hall screwed him. Hall responds that he lays down for nobody as that is not how the Kliq operates and Sid tells him he will lay down right now. Nash tries to calm him down. He reminds Sid that it was Bret that hit him with a crutch. Here comes Bret and he mocks them for talking about panties and calls them three big pussies! He states that Goldberg is the US champ. Before the night is over he is going to take it Goldberg and give it to him himself. Hall tells him to not sing it and to bring it. Here comes Bret. No longer limping or on crutches. He gets in the ring and now Goldberg has arrived and the Outsiders have fled. Goldberg climbs in and takes out Sid with a spear! Goldberg already took him out in Vegas and is willing to do it again in an “I Quit” match. Sid is in. Now to the Outsiders and seeing as they like to play games then a game of they hide and he seeks and destroys!
Tenay is with Sting and the latter is questioning the intentions of the Package. It makes Sting want to puke and he has some explaining to do. Tonight will be different with Goldberg as he has a lot to prove.
Liz makes sure the coast is clear for Lex and he comes in wearing a Pacers hoody. I should say sneaking in.
Kimberly needs help from Doug Dillinger as David Flair is stalking her….
Nash and Hall talk about getting security. Nash has his manager’s license….
Filthy Animals are in the ring after the break. Konnan tells Torrie that she can touch his hat and then says that is enough. Konnan goes off for a bit more. Rey states that if you are not down with the FA you will be humped or something. He calls Asya a mutt. Dean comes out with her and does not like that. He challenges Rey and Torrie to a match but wants to make sure his knee is okay….mockingly. Rey is for the match and he will muzzle Asya.
Match 1: Norman Smiley v. Kidman
Knobs is at the announce table. He is sick of Norman as he is the King of Hardcore. Kidman runs him into the ropes, Norman that is, and spanks him! Now Norman knocks him down and does the Wiggle on him before spiking him! Knobs has had enough and takes a hockey stick and beats the Hades out of Norman while the ref is distracted. Kidman wins.
*1/2 Nearly a star for the Wiggle!
Sting is looking for Luger.
Hall is with Nash and calls out to someone as Nash is getting dressed up again.
Here comes Sting! He calls out Lex and demands for him to come down. Liz comes down instead and lets Sting know that Luger is really sorry. Sting has his arm around her and talks about her working out and tanning and calls her the female Package. Now Luger has to come out right now. He does. Luger begs for forgiveness and assures Sting he meant nothing by it and to not to listen to the fans. He wants to work it out and asks for a hug! Instead Sting chokes him and warns him that if he ever swerves him again then he will “Get Ya!”
Kimberly is in a room and the lights go out. David asks if she remembers him and that she will not feel a thing.
Tony says with a straight face that that sounded like David Flair! No shit! He then shills Surge pop with Goldberg on it. Damn, I wish I had some of that.
Match 2: Madusa v. Chris Benoit
Benoit locks right up and does not fuck around. Madusa is game but a chop sends her down. Evan comes down and he and the ref brawl as he wants to get to her! Now other refs pull them apart. JJ runs in and attacks Benoit and gets knocked to the floor….
*1/2 Extra half for Benoit winning.
JJ has the mic and this is not the WWF and we do not hit women here. She kicks him a few times and he leaves and laughs that he screwed him out of the Tournament.
Chavo enters Russo’s office and the latter talks about the Ham and Egger Battle Royal and gives him a briefcase filled with Amway material and tells him to get a job and get out of his office!
Duggan is cleaning toilets!
Match 3: Disco Inferno (c) v. Rick Steiner
Not sure if this is for the title. Rick is kicking Disco’s ass. The Lodi kid who is now Disco’s kid comes down to the announce table. Apparently Disco owns him money as Rick kicks him ass some more and the kid screams at Disco about money. He had brought a bucket and Rick hits him with it…filled with concrete. It is Tony Marinara. I am serious. I get the concrete metaphor. Rick wins.
* Jesus Christ and this was the match of the week.
Nash is dressed as a Swami or some old gimmick he did earlier. He has a riot policeman, two, and some Chloroform and tape to mess with others. Hall feels bad about Sid and wants to make it right. Nash warns him that he is a psycho but is up for him.
End of the Nitro Girl search. Stacy! LOVE YOU! They start dancing. AC Jazz comes out and kicks them out of the ring and calls them skanks and K Mart material. Another Nitro Girl comes out and tells her to calm down. AC is hideous. They talk black. I mean it is really bad. Talk to the hand shit and they call each other Ho’s and have exaggerated hand movements and the shoving and squealing is awful. Other Girls come down and pull them apart. Terrible.
Kimberly is hiding from David and holding some object. She dropped it. Idiot. He is staggering towards her.
Here comes Seven and he is floating to the ring with a fog maching and fireballs! He finally floats into the ring as Tony and Bobby are hushed in awe. Well, Seven starts off and calls what he is wearing is crap. He left the WWF because of Goldust who sucked. He came back to WCW to be himself but the Powers that Be say Dustin is boring. Instead they dressed him up as Uncle Fester to Trick or Treat all year long. PTB can shove Goldust and Seven up their ass and they can kiss it too! Also, Dusty who helped build the company is no longer with it and he is pissed and he will make WCW and TNT’s life miserable. Tonight and nevermore they will never, ever forget the name of Dusting Rhodes.
Part of the reason the gimmick was dropped was because Turner felt that the gimmick could be misconstrued as a child molestor. In fact that may have been an idea…..Glad it was dropped.
Sting is getting ready in the back.
David asks Kimberly why she does not want to play anymore.
Hall and Nash are knocking on Sid’s door and Nash in high pitched voice keeps asking for him.
Luger knows how to make it up to Sting….Jesus I need Ritalin.
Match 4: Sting v. Goldberg
They lock up and Sting pushes him into the ropes and they have a clean break. But Goldberg kicks him a couple of times and Sting fires back and applies a sleeper. Goldberg is stumbling around hte ring. Lex and Liz are down and the two combatants run into the ref. Liz has mace and it squirts into Sting’s eyes….purposely from the looks of it. Goldberg does not care and a spear and Jackhammer finish off Sting.
* Fucking Christ. Could we have a match please? At least let it go five more minutes….
Nash is the Wizard his gimmick about ten years ago. He and Hall are making peace with Sid. Rick Steiner comes in and is not happy with Sid and wants to talk later.
Luger and Liz walk by Duggan who is mopping the floor. He is happy to see Duggan and takes away the warning sign so someone will clearly slip later.
Kimberly finds a security member and it is David and she runs off squealing.
Now to Vamp and the Misfits. They talk about getting picked on in High School and that Buff better watch out as evil has a place in WCW.
Match 5: Buff Bagwell v. Vampiro
The Misfits assault Buff as he comes down the aisle and roll him into the ring and now Vamp rips into him. Buff is mouting a comeback and takes down Vampiro and the rest of the Misfits. Vampiro grazes Buff with a missile kick and Berlyn comes down and knocks out Vampiro with a chain and the Blockbuster finishes him off.
*1/2 I have no idea why I gave it an extra half star but whatever. It was not good.
Berlyn and the Wall battle the Misfits. Berlyn is leaving and Creative Control comes out and beats his ass as he allowed Buff to win. The Wall carries him out.
Luger is down where the mopping was done and is crying that he blew out his knee bad.
Luger is on the gurney getting it checked out.
Match 6: Saturn v. Bret Hart
Now Bret is limping…Jesus. Shane is on commentary as Bret works over the arm of Saturn, yanking on it. Now Saturn takes him down and gets two. He has Bret in the corner and works the knee and then jumps on the ankle. A woman in the crowd squealed “Oh No!” He has Bret tied up. Bret fights up and does his usual and Shane mocks that he has seen this before! A Russian sweep and he drills Saturn with an elbow from the middle rope. Asya is on the apron and distracts the ref as Bret goes for the Sharpshooter. Shane hits him with his chain and it is DVD time! Bret kicks out! Saturn hammers him and then whips him into the ropes and Bret hits a crossbody getting two. Saturn shoves him to the floor. Malenko runs down and knocks Malenko off and beats his ass. Saturn leaps on both and he gets back in the ring and goes for a sunset flip but Bret rolls through and he applies the Sharpshooter and gets the win. Shane is screaming no over and over!
** Another match that should have been at least twice as long.
Kimberly is begging for help from Creative Control (CC) and they turn her down.
Nash is still in his Oz phase. He makes fun of UT and Austin and now talk about drinking and other nonsense.
Booker T comes down and he is not happy with CC and Jarrett. He want them to bring their three punk asses down right now. He wants to kick all their asses and he repeats the same thing. He wants them in a Harlem Street Fight and out they come.
Match 7: Booker T v. CC
JJ is at the announce table. Booker kicks both men but gets pounded and sandwiched in the corner. He flips one over the top rope and takes another down and pummels him. The other guy gets in the ring and blindsides him. He ducks a double clothesline and returns the favor to both men. JJ comes into the ring and Booker nails him but he is overwhelmed and mauled. A big black woman gets in the ring and she is belted with the guitar! Big as in buff…not fat. JJ and CC leave as Booker helps her up.
NR Not really a match.
Rey is walking in the back with a really, really hot Torrie.
Hall and Nash are conferring with the riot squad. Or planning.
Tenay is talking to Luger who is in a wheelchair and reminds him of his match with Sid. Luger tells Tenay that he is not a surgeon and needs to speak of what he knows of. He cannot wrestle tonight. Tenay informs him that the PTB has ordered him to wrestle or he is out of the Tournament. Luger wants to know what Liz as his manager will do about it.
Match 8: Rey and Torrie v. Dean Malenko and Asya
Torrie is a bit reluctant. Dean assaults Rey from behind and stomps the shit out of his knee. Asya cuffs a useless Torrie to the ropes. Now Asya has Rey and suplexes him! Rey fights back and takes out Asya and tries to fend off Dean but is put in the Cloverleaf and he taps. The FA run off the Revolution and uncuff Torrie.
* Wrestling? Please Lord…..
Someone was walking in the back. Who cares.
Kimberly is crying near a hot tub….David has found her and this time she will get more than a spanking.
Match 9: Sid Vicious v. Lex Luger
Luger is wheeled out and claims he cannot wrestle due to his injury. He and Sid are warriors but they will do it later after rest and rehab. Sting runs down and wheels him to the ring and dumps him into the ring.
Luger is in the corner begging off and Sid stomps the Hades out of him. Sid is annihilating him. The riot squad is in front of the ring and as Goldberg charges down they part and he spears Sid. Luger asks for a hand shake and is speared instead!
* Angle advancement.
Match 10: Brian Knobs v. Bam Bam Bigelow
Falls Count Anywhere. Norman is at the announce table. Bigelow gets blasted with a garbage can and a Surge cooler. They are brawling on the floor and now in the back. Norman follows and commentates. Knobs is owning Bigelow but is shoved into a downed basketball hoops. Jimmy hammers Bigelow and gets chucked. Now Knobs eats a garbage can. Kimberly asks Bigelow for help and he leaves and Norman wheels Bigelow out of the building….
*1/2 Some action at least. I think Bigelow won.
Hall and Nash are walking in the back heading towards the ring.
Bigelow is screaming for Flair as he looks for him with Kimberly who is wearing some sexy stockings.
Outsiders come out with a the riot squad. Quite a few of them. My guess or it could be my memory is that one of them is Goldberg.
Match 11: Scott Hall v. Lash Leroux
Lash starts strong and dropkicks Hall who rolls to the floor to confer with Nash. Nash digs in his pockets for some objects but Hall declines and gets in the ring and wants a test of strength and when Lash nears him he pokes him in the eyes. He smacks him around and then sandwiches him in the corner. Hall is stomping away. Hall keeps after him and slams him and then whips him into the corner but Lash gets the leg up and he double axes him and then runs him down. Lash hammers him but leaps right into the waiting arms of Hall and is nailed with a fall away slam. While the announcers praise Lash it is Edge time. It is over.
** At least it was a decent length.
Outsiders are in the ring with the riot squad. One guy does not leave and throws powder back into the face of Nash and spears both!
Match 11: Jeff Jarrett v. Curt Hennig
Curt takes him down twice and heads to floor and tells Heenan that it is a conspiracy and they are all in it. JJ heads after him and Curt decks him and works him over. JJ fights back and has Hennig reeling against the railing. He takes him back into the ring and pounds him some more. Curt fights back and after a clothesline gets two. He whips JJ but is hooked but he counters by shoving JJ into the ref and hits the Plex on JJ. CC runs down and pummels Curt. Why shove him into the ref…..oh well. They dump him on top of the announce table and then slam him through it!
** There was some wrestling. Curt was counted out. He was not pinned.
Here comes Kimberly. She is through hiding and tells Flair to come out and do what he is going to do in front of everyone. Bigelow blindsides him and then gets back kicked in the nuts and nailed with crowbar. She runs through the crowd. She was helped by a kind gentleman because her skirt was too tight in going over the railing. Nice!
David is on top of her car and destroying it with a crowbar. CC comes out and he flees. She was hiding in the car. It was unlocked…..they just opened it. Maybe they unlocked it because the glass was shattered.
Match 11: Sid and Scott Hall v. Bret Hart and Goldberg
Texas Tornado Ladder Match….US Belt is high above. They are all going at it. No ref yet. Here comes Nash with a ladder and he is the ref too. Goldberg goes after Hall who was heading for the ladder. He rams the ladder into Hall. In the ring Sid was battering Bret and so Goldberg drives the ladder into him a couple of times. Hall clocks Goldberg and now Sid takes him down but he is back up as Bret sags in the corner. Goldberg is hammering both heels. Rick Steiner has come down. He Bulldogs Sid and now Nash gets involved and takes out Bret and helps Hall get the belt and the win….
** Not long at all.
**1/2 I should probably rank this lower but part of me really likes it or really wants to like it. Not sure yet. No wrestling and that is something I bitched about in the WWF. I mean there really was no wrestling. But at the same time I am giving it a chance. I like the characters in WCW and the fact that the young guys are getting a shot. I love how Goldberg and Bret are the focus point. I think far too much is going on but a lot of it is entertaining. There are less dick and fart jokes than in the WWF and while the focus on insider shit is a bit too much, the show is still decently paced and for some strange reason compelling. My bias is showing but I am honest and I think fair. Books have been written on the errors of this time and I have noticed some but do not want to sit and comb through everything. I do not do that with RAW and just want to enjoy the show. I stand by that there needs to be more wrestling and less vignettes but that is not changing anytime soon and that is a shame but at least they are pushing different people. At least on the surface anyway as they get more air time…..We will see how it pans out. Oh, it is also clear that Sting is no longer really a heel but now most are in shades of gray….That to needs to slow down a bit as it has become quite chaotic.