Written by: Kevin Kindelberger
WWF Monday Night RAW 8/10/98
RAW dropped to a 4.55 off a 4.3 and 4.8 while Nitro received a strong 4.6 and two 4.7’s to get the win with a 4.65.
Here comes Mankind. Something happened on Sunday Night Heat. I guess I could have sampled the program as they have that one on YouTube but I just want to focus on the big stuff. He is confused and wants to know the truth. He is not mad at Uncle Paul and calls out Vince a couple of times as he needs help. Vince comes down and wonders how Mankind could wallow like this and not be embarrassed. He detests people who need help, people who rely on pillars of strength like Vince to get through the day. The mere sight of the invalid and infirm make him sick. Mankind, and he brings up all his names, is a special case. Vince states that Mankind did not invite him out to help you but rather to hurt you and the truth hurts. UT chose to hit him instead of Kane and targets him purposefully and disguised himself on Sunday to do the same thing. Vince continues that Kane and the Undertaker are in collusion together and they are one and the same and here comes Kane with Bearer. Paul tells Vince that he will listen to the fat man and that while he may be a great manipulator and that he may be able to get into the mind of Mankind but not himself or Kane. Vince has a son and how would he feel if he did that to him, and he will not allow his son to be manipulated. Paul threatens to take Kane and leave. Vince wants to know if he is finished and then stops, and finally bellows that Kane is not his son and as a matter of a fact it is a son of a bitch and that it is the Undertaker and he can smell him. He wants Kane to take off the mask and tries to do it and then the lights go out. The lights go back on and it is the Undertaker and he has Vince by the throat. He beats back Mankind and then knocks down Paul and gives chase as Vince runs for his life. Paul and Mankind are hugging.
UT is in the back and enters a room with a glimpse of red inside it and JR speculates if that was Kane.
Here comes Sable. Damn is she over the fans are going nuts. She introduces Luna being led out by the Oddities.
Match 1: Luna v. Jacqueline
They lock up and Luna takes her down. Mero is up on the apron and Sable pulls him off. He looks to go after her but Kurrgan backs him off. Meanwhile Luna is wailing on Jackie. Luna is snapped over and then hit in the vagina. Jackie goes up top and Sable shakes the ropes and down goes Jackie. Luna strikes with a swinging neckbreaker and goes up top and leaps on top of her and gets the win.
*1/2 At least there was some wrestling.
Sable gives an ecstatic Luna the bikini trophy.
Cole is outside the locker room door where UT went in and talks about the tag four corner match later tonight.
Outlaws have arrived in a limo and they are solo and not happy.
Match 2: Droz v. Savio Vega
They have changed the scoring criteria….10 for a punch I think. Droz blasts him with some shots. They go back and forth.
Round 2: Droz takes him down and they slug at one another. Droz got the upperhand this round.
Final Round: Savio gets pounded and he is weary and it is over.
** Not too bad. Fans were actually into it for a bit.
HHH and Chyna arrive in a Miata, okay I think it is a Porsche.
Cole goes up to Chyna and she squeaks for him to suck it and pushes him into the car (a convertible).
LoD come out and Hawk trips and is “drunk” again. He wants to wrestle but is told he cannot.
Match 3: LoD v. Southern Justice
They beat up Tennessee Lee on Sunday Night Heat as he cost JJ another match. Justice mocks Hawk and so he tackles them but he is led to the back. Animal is attacked but Droz runs down to help him out and now JJ comes down and cracks Droz’s skull with the guitar. JJ cuts Droz’s hair.
NR A mess.
X Pac now arrives. Solo.
New Age Outlaws have come out. HHH and Chyna trail behind. X Pac is in the ring too. HHH has the mic and states that everyone wants to know the state of DX and Pac grabs the mic and he sounds like a prepubescent teen when he tells HHH that he is sick of him and his bitch and that they are jack offs. HHH has the mic now and repeats what Pac states and calls him a bigger jack off. Now he calls the Outlaws on too. Now they repeat the obvious too. They are all calling each other jack offs. They are all in agreement HHH states. Jesus this if horrific. HHH is talking about splitting up or staying together. The fans do not want them to split. HHH says they need to give everyone the DX split and go to pull down their pants and she stops them and asks if they have thought people are tired of seeing their asses every week and HHH does not think so and so Chyna shows off her ass and they all giggle.
What the fuck? So all is well? Another teased split, I mean this shit gets old. Do I blame Russo? Or just….oh fuck it.
Austin is chilling in his locker room.
After the break he has shoved Cole into the showers calling him names.
Match 3: Godfather v. Vader
Bart Gunn goes up to JR and wants some respect because he beat Dr. Death and they all made excuses for him. JR agrees he was the better man that night but the man he needs to be thinking about is the Godfather as he brawls with him next week. Godfather has a proposition for Vader and asks if he has ever been with a Ho. He wants to make sure he knows what one is! Vader looks lost and damn if two of them are not fucking hideous. I am no spring chicken but I make a better looking woman than two of them. The third one is hot….The fans love this shit. Godfather wants his answer and Vader shakes his head. Godfather now offers all three and he can do whatever he wants with them. He agrees and they hold the ropes open for him! He slowly walks up to Bart Gunn and jaws at him. Bart hits him once and he is out….the knockout blow for Vader’s career. Bart goes after the Godfather who escapes and leaves with the Ho’s.
Okay, the Ho part was entertaining. At least Vader did not lose until getting knocked out by one punch.
A Limo has arrived and it is Val Venis.
In a vignette Dustin is talking about choosing wisely and not watching RAW and watching more wholesome entertainment instead.
Val is in a wheelchair, and an icepack for his nuts. Um, John Wayne Bobbitt is with him. Yamaguchi’s wife is there too. Val states he is half the man he used to be but you live and die by the sword. He is all sad and tells the ladies to take a raincheck but then rips off, or tries to anyway. He yells that the Big Valbowski is back. He is ready to unload and due to a case of shrinkage and John turning off the lights at the last moment he was safe. Lawler asks Bobbitt something and he just stammers about having a beer and living on the edge and that Val had a club soda and slice and was cut off. Lawler mentions his penis being on a milk carton. What a fucking mess. Val dumps Yamaguchi’s wife saying she is not worth the trouble and tosses her a battery…Jesus.
Match 4: Bradshaw v. Marc Mero
Brawl for All: Mero takes him down with a facelock but Bradshaw landed on him so he gets the points. Mero got in a couple of shots.
Second Round: Bradshaw will not let him go and the ref gets pissed. Now he sticks him and gets five.
Final Round: Mero is slugging away as Bradshaw runs at him. Mero has him against the ropes and pops him in the gut but the ref pulls him off. Bradshaw falls on top of him.
It is a draw. One more round: Bradshaw gets yelled at again. Mero peppers him but Bradshaw tackles him again. Mero is holding on to him for dear life and the ref breaks it. Both are dead tired.
** Bradshaw won. Fans mostly booed the entire show.
UT is pacing around ignoring Cole.
Jesus Rock is getting a pop now. A big one.
Match 5: Rock and Owen Hart (c) v. New Age Outlaws v. Kane and Mankind v. UT and Steve Austin for WWF Tag Titles
Shamrock has come out and he belts Owen and now the rest of DX are in and the Rock retreats after getting hammered. Owen is stuck in the Ankle Lock. The Nation is now involved. Owen is replaced by D’Lo Brown after the brawl is broken up.
Mankind and Austin are slugging away. Austin kicks him over and over in the corner. But he telegraph’s the backdrop and gets a swinging neckbreaker. Austin comes back and goes for the Stunner and Mankind escapes. Austin turns and decks the Rock and Mankind pops him and tries to suplex him to the floor but Austin bounces his neck off the rope and suplexes him back into the ring. Brwon is tagged in and he heel kicks Austin and after some stomps gets a two count. Austin is up and nails him with a forearm shiver and now it is Thesz Press time and he hammers away. He tags in Kane. Kane goes after Brown and then tags in Gunn. He drops Brown with a Rocker Dropper and now a press slam for two. Road Dog is tagged in and he gets decked and Brown tags in Mankind who stomps on Road Dog but he is backdropped after the piledriver attempt. Rock gets the tag and he stomps on Road Dog and Mankind is still in there but finally leaves. Now Brown is in. He suplexes Road Dog but Gunn gets the tag and he spikes Brown and gets two. Gunn kicks him in the gut but gets an eye rake and is dropped with a back elbow. Austin is tagged in and he unloads on Gunn, tries to yank off the arm and Undertaker gets the tag and he unloads on Gunn and punches him over the top rope and Austin drops him face first onto the railing. UT works him over after he gets back into the ring. Gunn tags in Austin and now UT is in but Gunn and Mankind start beating each other on the floor. UT and Road Dog are the legal men and it is rope walk time. D’Lo gets the tag and he continues punishing Road Dog and gets two. He holds him for the Rock who hammers him and then gets two after a Side Russian leg sweep. Rock kicks and stomps him and now hammers him with rights. Brown is tagged back in and he snaps him over and puts him in a rear chinlock. Road Dog fights to his feet but gets crushed with a spinebuster and he covers him but Gunn makes the save. Rock sets him up in the middle of the ring and the fans erupt for the People’s Elbow and now Austin makes the save. Mankind gets the tag and he works over the neck. Road Dog is up but gets shoved into the ropes and Mankind goes over and spits on Austin. Mankind chokes out Road Dog and sends him for the ride but of course gets caught on the backdrop attempt and Dog leg sweeps him. Undertaker gets the hot tag and he starts unloading and now Austin is in. UT boots Rock to the floor. Mankind eats the big boot. Austin is tripped up and dragged to the floor by the Rock. Brown eats a chokeslam and Gunn is sent to the floor with a clothesline. UT turns and Kane goozles him and gets the win after a chokeslam. UT rises up right afterwards and Austin looks baffled and stares at him and UT just stares too.
***1/2 One of the better RAW main events in some time. It was nearly twenty minutes long. Almost everyone got some time. It splits up UT and Austin as they are no longer tag champs and it perpetuates the Kane and UT saga as he was pinned after the chokeslam.
*** The main event was easily the best part. The Val Venis segment could be one of the worst I have seen in quite some time. The DX segment was awful too. Hell there was very little wrestling and like Nitro I may be overrating it a bit. None of the wrestling outside the main event was good, and the entire show was filled with dick jokes. It is starting to get really old so I will downgrade my rating to a **1/2