Written by: Kevin Kindelberger
WWF Saturday Night RAW 9/5/98
RAW is preempted but will be back the following Monday. The PPV was great and I am just going to start….
Vince comes out and he is giddy. He has Machiavellian plan and Austin will no longer be champ after the next PPV on the 27th. In fact he should not be champ right now and he tells the fans to go ahead and cheer their little hearts out as he will not be champ much longer. UT dominated the match but should not have sent Kane to the back. He lets it go and tells us how Austin was on Regis and Kathy Lee and how he has respect for the Undertaker. He mocks that and then goes after Undertaker and his “retarded” brother Kane. They are being laughed at in the back and could not terrorize a Kindergarten. He is called an asshole and ignores that calls UT and Kane putrid pussies not once but twice. Here they come and McMahon wisely leaves quickly and runs through the crowd.
Match 1: DoA v. Steve Blackman and Ken Shamrock
Eight Ball and Blackman start off. They go back and forth with Blackman dropkicking him. Here comes Kane and the Undertaker giving into Vince’s Skinnerism, as he stated they should be dominating the WWF and not be pussies. They come down and utterly destroy Blackman as DoA and Shamrock brawl. Shamrock is gone and DoA runs off with UT and Kane heading up after them. Shamrock is back in the ring checking on Blackman.
NR-Wise to not have Shamrock get destroyed.
Val is in a bathroom stall with a moaning girl. He is not moving and nor is she but she is moaning….
Here comes Val and he is like the fans’ family dog: he is loyal, obedient and he comes when he calls…..
Match 2: Val Venis v. Vader
Oh fuck, Vader is going to job to Val? Val attacks him right away but is run over. JR claims that Vader is in great shape but still has a ways to go! Dustin is in the crowd with a sign claiming that he is coming….Meanwhile in the ring they slug back and forth until Vader crushes him with a belly to belly suplex. Vader gets a near fall and then drills him with a big elbow drop. Vader slams him and heads up to the middle rope and gets another near fall after a big splash. Vader is boxing him and then short clotheslines him. Bradshaw comes down and gets in Vader’s grill. Now here come UT and Kane. Bradshaw wisely leaves and Val and Vader try to fight them but get annihilated.
**1/2 Hey, Vader did not get pinned! He even dominated most of the match. Of course Kane and UT fucking mauled him….
Cole is with Rock and Mark Henry. They have a chance to get the WWF tag titles. Rock threatens to slap Cole’s ten dollar toupee off. He starts with HHH and he gives him props for winning the IC belt but will get revenge. He makes fun of the Outlaws and how Billy Gunn has a tough name but he has beat up these types of guys for a long time…..
Match 3: Rock and Mark Henry v. New Age Outlaws (c) for WWF Tag Titles
Outlaws are in the back bragging about winning the tag titles….fuck them. Sorry, well no I am not. How are these guys over? Rocky sucks chants echo throughout the arena.
Billy and Rock start off and the former gets the upperhand for a bit. He brags and Rock does not take too kindly to that and starts pounding him. He slams him but runs into a clothesline. Now Road Dog is in the ring and kicks Rock in the head and puts him in a headlock. Rock escapes and tags in Mark Henry who dismantles Dog. He slams him and then after a legdrop gets a two count. Rock is in and he too unloads on Road Dog. It is People’s Elbow time! He and Henry doubleteam him and now Henry has a bearhug applied. Henry misses the splash and both men make the tag. Gunn knocks Rock around and drops him with a back elbow, tries to get the crowd behind him and then clotheslines the Rock. They go after Henry. Now Rock and Henry are brawling on the floor. Gunn eats the post and Chyna runs down and spears Henry and beats him…..He fell down for her. Outlaws hold her back.
** Okay. Chyna is really getting annoying. Oh, she has a new porn video out! I will not be watching that….oh it was a DQ.
Tiger Ali is talking about how American class and courage and will do anything for money. Jesus a dude ate dog food….JR asks the best question in some time and that is “Why do we give this guy air time?” Babu is eating Sardines and has been for four days and has not brushed his teeth. Ali will pay 500 dollars for any women to French kiss Babu. He gets to pick and some hottie in late 90s garb….midriff bare comes into the ring. Tiger calls her hot and will give her 600 dollars and she has to do it for five seconds. It really took about 20 seconds but she did it….reluctantly but got into it after she started…well she was hot so I will calm down. UT and Kane come down and Babu and Tiger get chokeslammed.
Match 4: Headbangers v. Southern Justice
Sorry, I was watching but was distracted. They have been going back and forth for about two minutes. Thrasher gets a head dropped on his nuts but he is able to roll up Phineas and get two. Now Henry Godwinn gets the tag (I still have no idea what their new names are). Okay, another minute of back and forth wrestling and Justice gets the win.
** Okay.
Kane and UT are trying to break down a door. Kane breaks it open with a sledgehammer, toss some stuff out and are looking for Vince.
Match 5: D’Lo Brown (c) v. X Pac for WWF European Title
Pac has his arm tied up but Brown counters only to be tossed. Pac goes back after the arm so Brown rakes the eye. D’Lo slams him and after a two count whips him into the corner, and clotheslines him off the rebound. Pac comes right back with a spinning heel kick and now leaps right into him. It is Bronco Buster time. He runs into Brown again and goes for the Buster and D’Lo gets his foot up and Pac’s nuts are crushed. D’Lo goes for a press slam but Pac counters and slams him face first, his facebuster or something to that effect. The ref has to delay the count to wait for a streaking JJ to run down and attack Pac. They brawl out on the floor and into the crowd. Kane and Undertaker come down and corner a scared D’Lo. Rock runs down and actually protects him and goes after UT! He is chokeslammed of course and D’Lo ran off.
** Disappointing follow up match but Rock came out looking strong, not backing down.
Match 6: Marc Mero v. Edge
Mero starts strong but Edge comes back. He dropkicks him and then clotheslines him to the floor. He strikes with a flying crossbody. Gangrel comes down and he and Edge start brawling. Gangrel is speared and they are rolling around the canvas. Mero leaves and he turns right into a UT clothesline and he and Kane stomp away.
NR Edge looks impressive. Too bad he is stuck in a feud with fucking Gangrel.
Al Snow is being interviewed by JR. They show him in ECW and how over he was. JR wonders how he can be taken seriously with a mannequin head. Snow states that he is normal and that he has kids and a family and even mows the lawn. Head watches him though…..The mixing of reality and crazy just weirds me out with wrestling. I am still unsure how I feel about that going back to the Mankind and Goldust interviews. Al does admit he hears voices, normal voices. JR talks about his desire to succeed in the WWF and mentions his failed gimmicks such as Avatar and Leif Ericson and how they drove him over the edge. Al talks about Vince and how he does not want to talk to him and that he is in charge of his voices….he then talks to Head and tells him to wait until they are in the car!
ICP and the Oddities are rapping in the ring. It sucks.
Match 7: LoD and Droz v. Oddities
Hawk is wearing a helmet acting drunk and dancing. He goes out and wants to dance with ICP and they ignore him so he beats them up! Hawk is in the ring and he tags in Kurrgan and dances around drunkenly and gets powerbombed and it is over.
DUD. This angle is a fucking joke.
Droz and Animal leave Hawk behind.
UT and Kane are in the parking garage and some worker dude gets beat up.
Match 8: Too Much v. Los Baricuas
Brian Christopher gets tossed to the floor but Scott Taylor dropkicks one of the Baricuas to the floor where Brian suplexes him. Taylor gives Jose a swinging neckbreaker and gets two after an elbow drop. Too Much doubleteam him and clothesline him. Brian hammers Jesus and now Scotty gets the tag and kicks him in the head and then suplexes him. He dances around and drops his fist into the throat. Damn this is boring….Brian is sent to the floor. Jose goes off on Taylor and gets a near fall. Brian is clotheslined to the floor. The Baricuas double powerbomb Taylor but Brian goes up top and leaps on top of Jesus as the ref is focused on Jose and Taylor pins him.
* Fairly dull.
Match 9: Scorpio v. Jeff Jarrett
JJ is finally getting some personality as he threatens Scorpio. Scorpio does not take to kindly to that and attacks. But JJ comes back and gets two after powerslam only to be caught and nearly pinned after a bridged German suplex. JJ knocks him to the floor but after Scorpio gets back into the ring JJ is sent to the floor and they brawl. Back inside the ring JJ greets Scorpio with a kick but is rolled up and nearly pinned. JJ has him in rear chinlock. Scorpio gets vertical and elbows free. He bodyslams him but misses the moonsault much to the fans disappointment. JJ places him up top and superplexes him. X Pac comes down and he hits JJ and the fight heads to the floor where they pummel one another.
** Another okay match angle advancement.
Here come UT and Kane again. Scorpio does not leave and just stands there and he gets demolished. Vince is standing at the top of the ramp with a grin as Scorpio is chokeslammed and given a spike Tombstone! That looks a bit dangerous. They finally see him and walk after him…
**1/2 Just average. It was a Saturday show so just a chance to expand on some angles and it did that. There was really no decent wrestling and it was all overbooked but the midcard got some time and Vince unleashed Kane and the Undertaker, and hopefully this leads to great Monday the following week….