Written by: Kevin Kindelberger
WWF Monday Night RAW 11/30/98
Okay, I am fair. I think so. I try to call it how I see it. I am subjective like everyone else but man has RAW sucked balls the last two weeks. I mean dirty, unwashed balls (Not that I know how those taste!). Just asinine, overbooked nonsense and shitty wrestling and shitty everything. The momentum of the Rock has been stifled. I think he is fine as a heel but Goddamn, he needs to be his own man and not tied to anyone but the WWF fails to realize that. I must be on crack because everyone talks about how shitty Nitro is, and I am digging it. I must be drunk or stupid or both. Is it Vince Russo? Time will tell….but I hope things improve. RAW won handily 5.0 to 4.2.
UT and Paul are conferring.
Here comes ICP and they want to fight tonight. Headbangers in the ring too. But Austin has arrived to a huge pop. The Headbangers clap as he gets in the ring with a shovel! They are Stunned! Thank God this match will not happen! Austin does not want until the Buried Alive match at the PPV he wants UT tonight! And that is the bottome line…..
I do love his jean shorts….ah the 90s!
Austin in the back looking for Undertaker.
Match 2: New Age Outlaws (c) v. the Brood
I guess this could be the second match. On Heat Vince was recruiting the Outlaws. Fuck, I will never get over as to why they are over. I am missing something here. But the crowd is HOT! I mean smoking HOT.
Road Dog runs Gangrel down, but the latter reverses the whip and gets two after a Russian sweep. Edge gets the tag and scissors him over. Christian hit Gunn as he had tried to get in the ring. Dog is Frankensteined off the top. Gunn was up top too so Edge tries the same thing and he is powerbombed off and nearly pinned. The McMahon’s are at the top of the ramp and called assholes. Gunn is tagged in and both he and Edge collide; they had panned to the top of the ramp. But both are down. Gunn is up first, and Edge has escaped….I missed Gangrel spitting that blood shit. He tags in Gangrel and Raod Dog is clotheslined to the floor. Christian just runs in and cracks Gunn with the belt. It is a DQ. The brawl is on and so Shamrock and Bossman come down to beat up the Brood.
** Decent match marred by the random DQ. Why not have Bossman and company run down when the Outlaws are in trouble? Seriously, what nonsense. It would make for better angle advancement rather than having Christian run in when they have the upperhand. Stupid.
Austin is in the Boiler Room and falls for the oldest trick in the book, locked in some room by Paul and Undertaker.
Henry is preparing for his date. He wants D’Lo to go with him to provide a confidence boost. Brown tries to beg off arguing he would be a third wheel. He will go after Henry begs him.
Here comes the Undertaker and he calls out Kane. He locked Austin in a freezer and will keep him on ice. He has things to settle with Kane and one of them will face the future tonight and the other faces eternal darkness. Kane obliges and they start to fight inside the ring, obviously! But UT beats his ass and Tombstones him. He drops the elbow and chokes him out. Kane is up as men wearing white and with strait jackets run down. Kane takes out UT and then drops a couple of them. They chase Kane as he escapes through the crowd.
Henry and Brown come up to a limo and the latter is worried about his state of dress. Henry has a suit for him. Henry gives him a chauffer’s hat! Brown is peeved but goes for it…..he enters the car but Mark waits for him to open the door and Brown, irate, finally obliges.
Henry is in a lobby and has some flowers and Chyna arrives and she does not look or act happy. She does not him to touch her but allows herself to be led out. Brown holds the door and she is baffled. BTW, Chyna is more manly than both!!
Ray Lewis, prior to murdering someone is in the crowd! Fuck the Ravens, oh if you are a Raven fan, I am sorry. Go Steelers!
Match 4: X Pac (c) v.
I could be wrong about the match as Pac calls down HBK. He comes down and calls him the Kid as the fans jeer. Some chants of faggot! Shawn repeats what he said last week and that he is the new sheriff in town. If he wants crap out of Pac he will pick it out of his teeth. Shawn has faced bigger guys in his stool. Pac asks how wide his bunghole is. HBK will send him down to that money pit in Atlanta if he even looks at him wrong. Pac is all revved up so he will give him a match. He will face Shamrock and it will be for X Pac’s title and then wants his music hit and it is DX’s and he tells Pac that he was DX before DX was cool and he leaves a befuddled Pac behind.
The limo has arrived at its destination. Henry and Chyna get out and she is pissed about the two dollar flowers. They get right in the club or restaurant as people go “Oh yeah.”
The freezer door is open…..
Back to the restaurant, and Henry wants bottled water and mispronounces Perrier and Chyna knows the real pronunciation and corrects him. He sings some Marvin Gaye for her as it plays in the background: What’s Going On, um that is about Vietnam and not romantic but that makes it all the more classic.
Match 4: Goldust v. Jeff Jarrett
Goldust tosses him around. Owen is at the announce table. Goldust is almost hit off the monkeyflip attempt but he dodges the punch. He front suplexes him and gets two as JJ gets his foot on the ropes. Goldust goes out after Debra and JJ hits him from behind and then runs his head into the steps. Back in the ring he strikes with a swinging neckbreaker. Goldust counters with a backslide for two and now JJ gets a quick two count. Goldust slides down off the whip and uppercuts JJ and then bulldogs him for another two count. Goldust goes behind and slams him backwards. Goldust looks at the crowd and is cheered, pulls him up and preps for the Shattered Dreams finishes…..the nut shot. Debra gets in the ring standing in front of Goldust and showing a little tit….nice. Goldust shows off a bit too. Owen is up from the table and hits him from behind and yet another DQ. The Blazer has arrived too and this time he nails Owen and beats him up and it is Blackman!
*1/2 Another DQ. Jesus, JJ was hung up in the ropes for an hour….oh well.
Match 6: Big Bossman v. Mankind (c) for WWF Hardcore Title in a Ladder Match
HBK tells the Job Squad to beat it and Bossman attacks. But Mankind knocks him into the steps and then cracks him with the ladder. Mankind picks it up and runs him down with it. He nails him with it again. Inside the ring he sets up the ladder and goes up it and Bossman gets in the ring, Mankind leaps into him. He sandwiches him in between the ladders and drops the elbow on top. He does it again. Mankind sets up the ladde and takes a while to climb up and Bossman prevents him from getting two high but is kicked in the gut and double-armed DDT’d. Mankind goes up again as Bossman slowly gets up and Mankind waits for him to get after him so he just takes some half-hearted swipes at the belt. Bossman tips the ladder, and beats him a bit. Bossman starts to climb and gets down and beats him some more. Now he goes back up and Mankind is there and they are slugging it out. Mankind gets the upperhand. He pulls out Socko; the Claw is applied and down goes Bossman. But he is right back up with Socko in his mouth and he is kicked down again. Rock runs in and tips the ladder with Mankind on it. Bossman shakes off the cobwebs and starts to climb but Mankind nuts the Rock and takes out Bossman. He goes up the ladder but Rock tips him over and it is Rock Bottom time. Now Bossman climbs up and takes the title.
**1/2 Had its moments…..I won’t bitch about the interference as that is the way it is supposed to work with Vince and company as they will do everything to win.
Michaels gets in the ring as he was at the announce table….I think I said that and congratulates Rock and Bossman and then beats up Mankind, hitting him with the nightstick.
Somewhere in the back UT and Kane are beating each other, tables are being overturned as UT is tossed over them. But Kane is laid out. UT says it is for his own good and is about to do something not so nice and Austin comes out of the shadows and breaks the shovel over his head.
Match 7: Marc Mero v. Duane Gill
Mero declares that if he cannot beat that jobber he will retire! Gill comes out with a belt on….Mero is destroying him (Oh Gill is from here). Mero kills him with the TKO. Job Squad has arrived at the top of the ramp. Mero does not cover him and just circles around. He finally goes up top and the Blue Meanie has arrived and pushes him off the top rope and Gill pins Mero.
* I guess Mero has to retire and I really think he does retire. The one retirement match that means something…Oh Gill is the Light Champ…confusing. When did Christian lose it?
Paul is leading the mental health doctor’s to where Kane is.
Henry is reciting a poem to Chyna with Michael Bolton in the background. She sucks down the booze.
Match 8: X Pac v. Ken Shamrock for WWF European Title
Pac kicks him but it has no effect and he is knocked into the corner. Pac reverses the whip and Pac runs right into the back elbow. Shamrock slams him…..Shawn is back at the announce table. Shamrock kicks him in the gut a few times but Pac flies off the ropes after ducking a couple of blows. Vince is in the back schmoozing with the Outlaws. Ken takes him down and gets a two count. Shamrock suplexes him and gets another two count. Shamrock kicks him in the face, has him in a front facelock, pulls him up a couple of times and now the ref checks the arms. Pac fights to his feet and he is able to take down Shamrock. He unloads some kicks to the head; kicks him some more and it is Buster time. Shawn distracts the ref as Pac hits the Facebuster and Bossman runs down and knocks out Pac with the nightstick. Shamrock goes for the Ankle Lock and HHH comes down and kicks him in the head and it is a DQ.
** Not much here, just to show what a dick HBK is.
The doc’s are carting off a person on a gurney wrapped in a plastic bag so we do not know who it is.
Henry is dancing to Brick House and finally gets Chyna to loosen up a bit. She sits back down and Henry wants to go to the bathroom. Some white boys come in and hit on her. They are acting like fucking idiots. They want to dance and call her a bitch so she hits him and Mark comes over and destroys the other two. Damn that bar was sad….looks like a cheap soap opera.
Val comes out and brings out the Godfather.
Match 9: Val Venis v. Tiger Ali Singh
Not paying attention. They have been going back and forth. Tiger hits a belly to belly as the Ho’s hit on Babu. Val takes advantage and pounds on Tiger. Here comes Terri and Jackie. Terri comes down and nuts Val and yet another DQ….fuck.
DUD. Seriously who fucking cares.
Shane McMahon comes out and he talks about Sable and how Vince made her a superstar. He calls her out. She has cologne that the WWF is selling or perfume and he goes to smell it and is really close to her and she sprays it in his eyes!
Match 10: Al Snow v. the Rock (c) for WWF Title
Rock runs at him but is taken down. Now Al catches the leg and slams him getting a two count. Al unloads about ten headbutts and after a suplex gets two. Al smacks him upside the head a few times but is kicked and nearly pinned after a DDT. Rock dumps him to the floor, and heads out after him. Al blocks his head going into the table and does it to the Rock. He bodyslams him and then goes on top of the barrier and misses the moonsault. Rock clotheslines him and rolls him back into the ring strikes with straight clotheslines and gets a near fall. Rock stomps on him and then kicks him into the corner. Al fires back but is sent into the other corner and off the rebound Rock clotheslines him. Rock ducks an Al clothesline and the ref eats it. Al is Rock Bottomed and the fans erupt. Rock places Head in the center of the ring and hits the Elbow! Snow does not appreciate that and is up and kicks the Rock and then wallops him with Head. The ref is still down though and here come Bossman and Shamrock. Snow turns around and right into another Rock Bottom! He is pinned.
**1/2 Short but fun. NO INTERFERENCE!
Mankind comes down and is stopped by Ken and Bossman and beaten up. Rock joins in. The Job Squad runs down to join the fray but the Rock just leaves. But is chased down by Mankind and the donnybrook is on!
Bearer is all giddy that Kane is gone and he turns around and Austin is right there and he opens the freezer and Kane is right there! They grab him and bring him to the ring. Austin calls him a dumb bastard and wants to know how he feels knowing he sent the Undertaker to the crazy house and how he cannot save his fat ass. He is all pissed about last week. He calls Bearer a sick bastard and declares that he is thirsty and wants a beer. He asks the crowd if they want to see Kane beat his ass and they do. He stops Kane and talks about the gas can and stops him again. Now he has scissors. Austin cuts his shirt open as Paul begs. He acts like he is going to stab him but stops and then has Kane help take Bearer to the back. They are now outside and Paul is shoved down. Kane opens a manhole and they start to stuff his fat ass into it and do so headfirst and close it up! Austin flips it off and they leave.
**1/2 Better than last week. I understand the point of all the interference. Well, for the Corporation but not everything else. A long ass ending. Random mental health doctor’s and just too much going on that it makes my head hurt. However, the ladder match was fun, Pac had an okay match and the main event was fairly solid. Now they are heading into the PPV and hopefully it gets better.