Written by: Tom Hopkins
We’re just hours away from the Royal Rumble with this (TV-14) episode of Superstars! We’re at the Frank Erwin Center in Austin, Texas and Mr. Perfect is joining Vince McMahon in the announce booth. Perfect makes his perfect prediction – that Flair will win the WWE title. This looks like a loaded show with an incident with the Rockers and a new IC Champion.
-The Barbarian vs. Macho Man Randy Savage (w/Elizabeth)-
Vince talks about Mountie winning the WWE title after beating Bret for the title at a house show where Bret wrestled with a bad case of the flu. You know, Jake Roberts is on the card today and I wonder if Jake will interfere. Barbarian powers down Savage to start as we hear from the Undertaker (well, Paul Bearer actually) in a pre-taped comment. Barbarian slams Savage down and he heads upstairs. He misses a big splash and Savage heads upstairs to hit the Flying Elbow Drop. That’s enough to finish things at 2:25. Wow, Savage got only one move in but he still made Barbarian look like a total jobber. He only lasted 2 and a half minutes?
Mean Gene is in the Event Center (brought to you by Supertape 1992 – which includes all the This Tuesday in Texas Matches) and the big news is that we have a NEW Intercontinental Champion. The Mountie bested a flu-ridden Bret Hart in Springfield. Piper aided Bret after the match and he got beat-down, too. So Bret is out of the Rumble but Piper is in and he’ll be challenging the Mountie for the IC title. We hear from both men. Mountie and Hart don’t say much but Piper promises to win the title so he can use it to hold up his kilt.
-Virgil vs. BA Dalton-
Perfect calls Virgil brainless and I’ll have to disagree – he’s a teacher for cryin’ out loud! Virgil backslides Dalton and clotheslines him down. Virgil throws weak looking punches and even an enzuigiri. Through the magic of recorded film we hear from Virgil. He’s gonna give Repo Man the “whoopin’ he deserves.” A Side Russian leg Sweep sets up the Million Dollar Dream which ends this squash at 2:07.
Sean Mooney is at the Event Center and he brings us promo’s from participants of the Rumble, specifically El Matador, Skinner and Big Boss Man.
-The Nasty Boys (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Dale Wolfe & Robert Taylor-
I know one of the jobber’s is Wolfe but I couldn’t quite hear the second one’s name so what’s there is a best guess. Jameson is at ringside. Knobbs starts off with Taylor and Taylor is just decimated. Perfect wants to see the armpit spot and he gets to see it! Taylor is splashed in the corner and the Nasty’s finish with a powerslam/top-rope elbow combination to end this at 3:04. Wolfe didn’t get into the match at all. So The Nasty’s pummel HIM after the match.
Earlier this week Mean Gene interviewed Hulk Hogan. Hogan will get win the WWE Title at the Rumble. He’s gotten got past all his challenges before – like Andre the Giant, Ted DiBiase, Macho Man, Earthquake, Sgt. Slaughter, and even Undertaker. Correct me if I’m wrong – but Hogan never actually pinned Earthquake on a big PPV. Hogan calls out his challengers – Sid, Undertaker and Savage. What, no Flair?
-Berzerker (w/Mr. Fuji) vs. Scott Baizo-
Berzerker whips Baizo to start before shoulder blocking him down. Baizo gets tied up in the ropes and Berzerker nails him with two big boots. He powerslams Baizo down and then tosses him over the top to earn the count-out victory at 2:44.
Sean is at the Event Center again and he brings us promo’s from the British Bulldog and IRS. We also hear from the Bushwhackers and Jameson. They will turn the Beverly Brothers into the Dolly Sisters.
Vince then brings us to the Barbershop from Wrestling Challenge last week. This full video is actually available during this month’s “Twists, Turns & Teases,” feature on WWEClassics.com. you all know the story here. Shawn and Marty shake hands and embrace and Shawn stuns everyone by superkicking him and throwing him through a plate-glass window. The best part of this whole thing is Heenan’s comments. He says that the Rockers need each other and Michaels immediately superkicks him. Heenan, without missing a beat, says, “I knew he was gonna do it!” Heenan was awesome. Jannetty does a blade-job and there’s your TV-14 rating, kids.
Gene brings us a Royal Rumble Report and as a result Marty Jannetty is OUT. We hear from Shawn Michaels. This started Shawn’s solo push which culminated in him being a multiple time WWE Champion. Gene tells us the rules of the event and then runs down all the participants of the Rumble. Along the way we stop for some promo’s, including Ric Flair (with video-distorted WWE Tag Team belt and Mr. Perfect, who is not video distorted), Jake Roberts, Randy Savage and the Undertaker. They certainly picked some big names for the interviews. Gene also runs down the rest of the card and we hear from both sides of the Tag Title Match (Legion of Doom vs. The Natural Disasters). Highlights are Hawk telling the Disasters to eat more salad.
-Jake Roberts vs. Jobber-
Roberts shoulders the jobber in the corner and works the arm as we hear from Sid Justice. The DDT ends this at 2:17.
We have one more Event Center with Sean Mooney. We hear from more Rumble participants, including Texas Tornado (who tells us the event is bigger than the Super Bowl and Wimbledon), Repo Man and Hacksaw Jim Duggan. McMahon shills the Rumble before the show cuts out.
-The Bottom Line-
I thought this was a great episode. There were some HUGE things going on here – including a new IC champion, the Rocker incident and the final hype to the Rumble. In fact, I thought the matches actually dragged the show DOWN a bit of you can believe that. If this show has about 20 minutes of matches (even 2-3 matches) and then 20 minutes of hype it’d be a perfect show for me. As it stands, it was pretty good.