Written by: Tom Hopkins
This is another TV-14 presentation and I assume it’s because Liz gets smacked around again, or at least footage of her getting smacked around again.
We’re smack dab in the middle of National Eye Health Month and we’re still in Austin, TX at the Frank Erwin (not IIIIIIIIIIIII-rwin) Center. It’s Mr. Perfect and Vince McMahon hosting, as they’ve done for the past few months. Perfect hypes the appearance of Ric Flair on the Funeral Parlor. Perfect predicts Flair will win the title and even calls him a pupil of the Game! I guess even back then Flair was just Triple H’s lackey.
-Hacksaw Jim Duggan & Sgt. Slaughter vs. Jesse Hernandez & Barry Horowitz-
You know how much I love Hacksaw matches! Sarge seemingly has his country back now and he starts off against Barry Horowitz. Actually, these are the only two people in this match who won a WWE title in the 90’s. Hacksaw never held a title during his run, and I’d bet money Jesse Hernandez didn’t either. Barry tags in Jesse and Hacksaw no-sells the tag-in! Hacksaw bodyslams both jobbers and dumps Barry. Ever the American sportsman, Sarge heads out and sends Barry into the ringpost. The three-point stance clothesline ends this at 3:34.
Now, you’ve been reading these reviews long enough so you should know what’s next: The Update Center with Mean Gene Okerlund! This is brought to us by Supertape ’92. That Coliseum Video basically presented all the matches of Tuesday in Texas. We look at footage of Sid Justice at the Barber Shop and Sid wants to win the Rumble. Sid says Justice will be Served. What a tag line! We hear from three other participants of the rumble: Warlord, Big Boss Man and Rick Martel. Actually none of those three guys came close to winning a WWE title. Boss Man had a title match at Armageddon 1999 and was decisively beaten. McMahon does a voice-over promo for the Rumble to show how special and close this event is.
-IRS vs. Robert Taylor-
IRS talks about the new tax laws of 1992. Between this and WCW Saturday Night, I’ve seen more IRS/VK Wallstreet matches this month than I think I’ve ever seen before. IRS argues with the ref and Taylor rolls up IRS for two. IRS tosses Taylor and Taylor takes a WICKED fall to the outside. He literally fell on his neck. The Write-Off ends this at 1:47.
It’s Event Center time with Sean Mooney. We hear from Virgil (who will take on anyone – including his friends – so he can have the belt), Berzerker (w/Mr. Fuji) and El Matador. Three other guys who never had a sniff of the World Title before. At least Tito held IC Gold a pair of times as well as the Tag Titles. What’re you waiting for? CALL YOUR CABLE COMPANY NOW!
We look back at the Jake Roberts/Macho Man match from Tuesday in Texas and we see the last few moments of the match, as well as the subsequent post-match activities where Jake slaps Liz down. After that segment eats up a bunch of time we hear from the Mountie and Bret Hart – who will be facing each other at the Rumble for Hart’s Intercontinental Title. Of course things don’t always turn out as planned and it turned out that NEITHER of them would leave the Rumble as the champ.
-El Matador vs. Brian Donahue-
Perfect asks if the ornaments on Tito’s jacket were left over from Christmas. Perfect was always good commentary. Not quite up to Heenan’s level but they had similar senses of humor when it came to their comments. Tito lays out Donahue with a dropkick early on as we hear from the Texas Tornado about the Rumble. All he says that if he meets his friend, El Matador, at the Rumble – the friendship is out the window. Donahue takes a bad fall from a backdrop so Tito quickly finishes with a flying forearm killshot to the back of Donahue’s head.
Perfect walks off to join Flair at the Funeral Parlor and Vince doesn’t like that Perfect walked off the job before the replay of the end of the match. Vince then talks about the WBF magazine.
Speaking of the Funeral Parlor – it’s time for that segment now! Ric Flair, with his consultant walks out for their interview. Bearer points out that Undertaker is in the Rumble two but Flair has two things going for him that Undertaker doesn’t: Flair is perfect and the real world’s champion. Flair holds up the Real belt which is clearly the Tag Title now. Flair cuts an awesome, spirited promo. WHOOOOOO. The way he calls out Hogan is just amazing to listen to.
It’s more Rumble Hype via the Royal Rumble Report. Mean Gene thankfully recaps the whole card. We hear more promo’s from the various entrants including: British Bulldog, Repo Man, Rowdy Piper, Jake Roberts and Hulk Hogan. Wow, between the 5 of them they had a combined 5 Title reigns! Okay, so Hogan had all of them but at least this was a bit more star-studded in terms of people highlighted. Bulldog and Piper main evented PPV’s, and Roberts was always a big star. He main evented the Heroes of Wrestling PPV, too, but I’m sure he’d like to forget that one!
It’s the third Chris Chavis promo to appear. He’s chilling at a bonfire as some Native Americans dance around him. He wants to bring the sacred wisdom of the Indian Nation back to Earth, or to the WWE, whichever comes first.
-Natural Disasters (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Bobby Jones & Ken Johnson-
The Natural Disasters are better known as Golga and The Tugboat. Or as the Shark and Shockmaster. Toot Toot! Time to SHOCK THE WORLD! Earthquake hits a nice belly to belly on one of the jobbers. We hear from the Legion of Doom and they will not be giving up the Gold at the Rumble. The Disasters hit a double avalanche in the corner before doing it again with both jobbers stuck there. They end with the Butt-Splash, big Splash combo at 3:17.
We have enough time for one final Event Center. Mooney runs down some of the Rumble matches and we hear from the Beverly Brothers and their manager, the Genius. We also hear from Ted DiBiase (w/Sherri) and Sgt. Slaughter. McMahon hypes next week’s show that will feature the Nasty Boys, Virgil, Jake Roberts, the Macho Man/Barbarian match that was supposed to air this week and a special Hulk Hogan interview.
-The Bottom Line-
This was actually a very decent episode. I am pissed that the advertised Savage/Barbarian match was never shown but the different promo’s and segments here that built to the big angles and the big event (Royal Rumble). The matches were nothing but really it was an afterthought to the Rumble event. I thought this was quite the enjoyable show.