Written by: Kevin Kildenberger
The true last Nitro, where WCW was still independent. I don’t recall anything about this one but I am interested in seeing what goes down. They had a great run with the Cruiserweight Tag Tournament, and the the entire division as a whole has been getting rejuvenated. Last week’s Nitro was not very good, but Thunder was great and the PPV had its ups and downs. My guess is that they will begin with a “funeral” for DDP. I thought I had a lot to say, but I am not really sure what to say right now that I have not. A lot can be saved for the Final Nitro. Nitro received a 2.2. While RAW garnered a 4.6 falling from a 4.9 last week.
They do indeed have a funeral. A shot of the American flag with Taps playing, and a trailer park in the background.
Steiner comes down with Midajah. He is bragging about his accomplishment last night. He reminds us that he is the greatest champ of all time and all the people he has taken out. Flair and Animal come down. Flair discusses his and JJ’s match last night and how they kicked some ass. He is going to make Dusty kiss his ass. Dust and Dustin pop up on the big screen and talk about JJ kissing his big white ass. Steiner demands to know who they think they are. He pops off for a moment. Dusty could care less as he has been champ before and respects the belt. Now cue Booker T, and he and Steiner jaw at each other. Steiner is not too happy with Booker and his taunts. Booker questions why Steiner has not mentioned taking him out since he has returned. Booker wants the title. Booker focuses on Flair and calls himself the man, and Steiner and Flair are pretty livid right now.
Buff documentary crap. He is with Animal. Buff is pissed and yells at the camera guy and tells him do his job. He wants him to follow Luger everywhere.
Match 1: Jason Jett v. Disco Inferno
Hard to get into a Disco match….But it was not too bad. Jett wins.
**
Bischoff has a major announcement tonight. Poor WCW.
More Documentary stuff.
Match 2: Shane Helms (c) v. Kidman for WCW Cruiserweight Title
Shane tries to speak like a thug, and finally gets to the point: He and Kidman have each won a match and so he would like another one.
He comes out and it is on. They go at it, and Kidman is knocked to the floor. Helms flips out on top of him and then hucks him into the railing. He hammers him, and after bringing him back into the ring he gets two after a crossbody. Kidman comes back and gets in some extended offense including a couple of near falls. He whips Helms into the ropes but he is clotheslined. Helms then finishes him off.
**1/2 Wow, way too short.
Chavo attacks him from behind….Now Elix and Romeo come out to help. Rey runs down and clears out the tag champs. Chavo gets superkicked to the floor.
They keep hyping up next week as the season finale….
Spring Breakout highlights.
Luger is laid out in the dressing room.
Bigelow whines about his loss at the PPV. He gets a rematch tonight.
Animal is bellowing about who keeps knocking them out. Luger didn’t see anyone. Animal and Buff look at each other and think it could be Rick Steiner now.
Stacy comes out and she wants a bigger ovation. She gets it. She calls out Stasiak. Boy, her talents are wasted on this guy. Fans chant boring when he comes out. He does his usual boring spiel. He is clearly Roided up but I have had my one touch with greatness tonight.
Match 3: Sean Stasiak v. Bam Bam Bigelow
For some reason when Stasiak is in command of the match he wants the hairspray and Bigelow takes it, throws it at him, and then kicks him and finishes him off with the Greetings.
*1/2
Stasiak calls Bigelow a cheater and wants a rematch. Bigelow grants it next Monday Night. He wants to tattoo her if he wins. Stacy is not happy. Sean agrees with it. But Bigelow informs him that it was Sean and not Stacy who will get the tat.
I guess Booker T gave him an hour, Steiner, to come out. Steiner comes out and he is in the ring with Flair and Terry Taylor and a table is set up in the ring etc. Bischoff is on the phone now. He is talking about buying WCW. He has run into a few roadblocks if not a brick wall. This could be the last Nitro. So he wants to make next week the Night of Champions and every title will be up for grabs. Their match will be a title v. title match. He is extending an invitation to any former WCW champ for next week to come by. He is talking about Flair now and respects him. It is in Flair’s best interests to kiss Dusty’s ass tonight!
Bischoff sounded a bit sad….Now many thought that this was a swerve, a shoot, a rib, and that WCW was not sold. Bischoff had been known to pull stunts like this. And with a week left he knew he had at least one more show. And of course anything could have happened in that week but for once Bischoff was being honest….
Contract signing and Booker is waylaid and then piped over and over. Security is wasted and so are refs. Damn Steiner is manhandling them. Flair is holding Booker but he is decked and Steiner is knocked to the floor. Steiner is yelling at him. Booker signs it and tells Scotty to not hate the player but rather the game. Steiner is livid, trying to get at him.
Hudson and Schiavone are acting like it is just another Nitro and it will be off the charts. Of course, they are probably clueless as to what is happening.
Buff is telling JJ and Flair they are heading into Rick’s locker room. Flair is worried about kissing some ass.
Match 4: Kanyon v. MI Smooth
Kanyon has a new entrance where his catchphrase is echoed….
Smooth is dominating. Kanyon comes back but Smooth has pretty much owned him. Smooth slams him, crushes him with a big standing splash. Two count. Smooth whips him into the corner but misses and gets all post. Kanyon goes for a chair. Animal comes down, wipes out Smooth and before the Cat can put a stop to it, Kanyon wins.
*1/2
Cat challenges both to a tag match on Thunder.
Dusty is going to eat 33 burritos. Dustin is playing along as Dusty says he is going to smell like burrito when Flair kisses his ass.
Match 5: Rick Steiner v. Konnan
Konnan is getting mauled. After three minutes of getting his ass handed to him, Konnan strikes with Rolling Thunder and then face plants Steiner but that is ended with a big lariat and then an over the top suplex. Two count. Konnan tries to fight back but he is tossed. Douglas runs out of the crowd and cracks Steiner with the casted arm. DQ.
*1/2 Poor Konnan.
Konnan is arguing with the ref and gets ambushed by Rick. Morrus makes the save.
Buff and Animal knock on the dressing room of Rick’s and begin to question him.
Awesome and Storm brag about their win last night.
More JJ/Flair conferring. JJ is telling him to man up. They see someone is watching from the partially open door and tell the person to beat it.
Awesome and Storm are in the ring and Storm is about to tell the fans to stand for the Anthem but the tag champs come out, interrupting.
Match 6: Storm and Awesome v. O’Haire and Palumbo (c)
Sorry…Back and forth match, and fairly long too. Storm and Haire are on the floor, and Storm runs in with a chair and gets it kicked into his face. Ref is distracted and Awesome belts Palumbo with a chair and he is Bombed and finished.
**1/2 Not bad.
Jarrett and Flair come out. Flair rants and raves about Dusty etc. Dustin comes out and swear he has a cloth penis hanging from his tights. Dusty comes out and he has a donkey with Dusty’s Ass written on it. Flair is not pleased. It has had 300 or so burritos. Dusty tells him to make a decision. Flair cannot do it and wants JJ to do it. JJ disagrees. They bicker and the distraction works as Dustin is on the apron and he is hotshotted off the top rope and then stomped. Dusty runs down and he is beaten too. Dusty is taken to the donkey or mule or whatever it is but Dustin takes out JJ and Flair is forced to kiss its backside and he flees in horror.
**1/2 Obviously a fairly bittersweet show. Basically Bischoff says that the shit has hit the fan but Schiavone acts like it is just the end of the season and that it will restart down the road. Nope. Overall it just felt like a filler show paving the way for next week or the reboot. There was some wrestling, most of it mediocre and more Magnificent Seven shenanigans but unfortunately that stable has worn out its welcome as the mysterious attacker is not all that compelling. Buff and Lex are a drag on not only the stable but the show itself. Sean Stasiak has some talent and charisma and they are trying with him as they saddle Stacy with him. However, her talents are wasted there. Sanders is more deserving. I am curious to see who would have received a push. Stasiak never would have risen above the US title. I wonder if Storm or Awesome would have gotten WCW title shots down the road? Oh well. It will be interesting to see what happens with Thunder but then again it is filmed right after Nitro so there will be no new developments. I am not sure what I hoped for in the show, and it was not a bad one but then again it was not that good. If anything it was by the numbers….