Credit to: Rajah.com
-Clips of RAW where Triple H and Steph get ready to renew their vows. Trips learns that Steph isn’t pregnant. Triple H says it’s over between them!
-We’re here in the Alltel Arena in Little Rock, Arkansas for Smackdown! with Micheal Cole and Jerry “The King” Lawler.
Vince comes down, arm in arm, with Stephanie McMahon-not-so-much-Helmsly. Vince says anyone who thought he would abandon his daughter in her time of need was wrong. Anyone can count on Vince when the chips are down. He stands proudly by Daddy’s Little Girl. Sure she lied, but everyone else does every day. There’s a crowd full of liars. Triple H humiliated Vince and Steph. He struck Vince down. Then he commited a sin for which there is no repentance- he struck down Stephanie. He’s going to pay eternally, just like he’s going to pay this Sunday. He’s going to lose his Wrestlemania spot to Angle. There is no way out for Triple H. Steph gets on the mic. A perfect plan was again destroyed by Linda. But Steph will deal with her later. Tonight she’ll focus on HHH. She did lie, but he made her do it. He didn’t show her enough respect. He also made her look at all the photos of his nice and happy family. She then ripped them up. All the photos of his first championship belt. His first match. All the tapes of his matches (she ripped them up?). She burned all his baby books, just like he burned her on RAW. She’ll destroy him, just like he tried to destroy her reputation. She vows to make his life a living Hell. Vince says that Hell begins tonight. Kurt Angle and the Undertaker are going to take on Maven and Triple H tonight! Also, before the night is over, Steph is going to give Triple H a VD surpise (A Valentine’s Day Surprise, that is…but with Steph, we couldn’t be surprised).
-Test comes into Booker’s lockerroom. He’s worried about Booker’s big match against…Spike Dudley. They laugh. Test says that they have a chance to become the 3 time tag team champs. Booker says he’ll destroy Spike tonight, and Test can dig that.
-We get a special Valentine’s Day advertisement for the Godfather’s escort service. There’s be a two-for-one sale!
Spike Dudley vs. Booker T
Spike comes down. Booker follows with Test. Booker tells Test to take the night off, saying he’s got this. Kick to Spike. Chops by Book. Knees and a scoop slam by the Booker Man. Spike battles back. Clothesline by Boioker. Back body drop by Booker, 1-2-Booker lets up. Armwrench and hook kick by Booker. Scissors Kick. Booker hits the Spinneroonie. Kick to the face, 1-2-Booker lets up again. Booker hits a superplex, but Spike hooks his leg for a small package, 1-2-3!
Here is your winner- Spike Dudley
-Jericho runs into Flair in the hall. Flair needs to see him in his office. Jericho wants to meet in his office. Flair says he’s the co-owner, so they’ll meet in his office.
-Flair shows Jericho what he did to Austin on RAW. Flair is going to give Jericho the chance to leave the arena now so Austin doesn’t rip him apart. Flair wants the title match at No Way Out to be intact. Jericho says he isn’t afraid of Austin, Austin is afraid of him, which is why he hasn’t arrived yet. He saw Ric on RAW in the ring with Taker. He was afraid. Flair isn’t half the champ Jericho is. The champ isn’t going anywhere. Wait, he’s complaining that he can leave Little Rock? Jericho changes his mind and goes to leave, but Flair stops him. Flair says he’s changed his mind. Jericho will face Kane tonight. But he’ll be a sitting duck for Austin. No, Flair says, he’ll be a larger than life, living legend, Undisputed Champion sitting duck.
-Billy comes in and talks to Chuck. They exchange Valentine’s gifts. They both have the same gold wrapping. Billy says he cares about Chuck…as a tag team partner. They hug.
-The Acolytes are disgusted by B and C’s display. Bradshaw asks if Farooq got him something. “Damn”- Farooq.
Acolytes vs. Chuck and Billy
The APA comes out first. The not-so-ambiguously gay duo comes out next to some new pop-tastic music. They feed each other chocolates from their gifts. King guards the chocolates at the announce table. The APA ambush them while they take off their robes. Double shoulderblock in the ring to Chuck. Bradshaw knocks Billy off the apron with a Big Boot. Chuck goes for a cross body, but Bradshaw catches him and hits the fallaway slam. Tag to Billy. Shoulderblock and elbow drop by Bradshaw, 1-2-kickout. Tag to Farooq. Back elbow by Farooq. Chuck hits Farooq from his corner. Bradshaw comes over and nails Chuck (hits him, that is). Chuck sends Bradshaw into the steps. Spinebuster to Billy. Farooq looks over, and Chuck hits him with the chocolates with a weight in it. Billy covers for the 1-2-3.
Here are your winners- Chuck and Billy
-Austin enters the arena.
Austin comes down to the ring. Austin contemplates for a moment. He’s come out to this ring, stunned a lot of people, flicked a lot of people off, drank a lot of beer, and reased a lot of Hell. Tonight, he’s going to talk about something he’s bever talked about. He’s goign to admit something he never thought he’d do. His name is Stone Cold Steve Austin and he’s a drug addict. His drug of choice happens to be the WWF Championship (And crack, too. Don’t forget the crack). He has to have that Championship. He will do anything to himself and Chris Jericho to get those belts. This Sunday, Sunday Bloody Sunday, Jericho has no way out. This Sunday, when the ref counts 1-2-3, Austin will be the WWF champ. Austin will be getting his fix on championship gold. He’s going to hit that Stunner, and he’s going to “put some stink on it” (he’s going to Stunner him with a Stinkpalm?). He’s going to become the WWF champ, and no one can stop him. And that’s the Bottom Line, cause Stone Cold said so.
Val Venis vs. William Regal
Val comes out. Hello ladies. Tonight he’ll make a lucky lady’s dream come true. He pikcs one lucky girl. “Come to daddy”. Normally, Val would have her remove his towel. But since it’s Valentine’s Day, it’s appropriate for him to remove his own towel. But he has a present for her. He has a “heart-on” under his towel. He takes off his towel to reveal a big heart on his crotch. He gives it to her. Since he took something off and gave it to her, she should take something off and give it to him. She takes off her black button down shirt to reveal a red bra, and gives him the shirt. He gives her a big kiss all the way down to the floor. He gives her back her shirt (to ruin it for the rest of us). Regal comes down to the ring and is patted down (I still maintain that patting down Regal in his pink tights has to be the worst job ever). Clothesline by Val. Back elbow and elbowdrop by Val, 1-2-kickout. Suplex by Val. Val goes up top, but Regal shoves the ref into the ropes, knocking Val down. Regal grabs the brass knucks and hits Val for the 1-2-3!
Here is your winner- William Regal
After the match, Coach talks to Regal about his Brass Knuckles on a Pole match with Edge at No Way Out. Regal punches Coach. Edge comes out and spears Regal. Edge beats on Regal until he is dragged away by referees. -Jericho walks into his room and sees a six pack on the table. He hears a can open behind him, and Stone Cold is standing right there. Austin tells him to pick up a beer. Austin says he didn’t have a problem picking it up on RAW. Austin tells him to open it because he wants to toast. Austin asks if Jericho’s ready for Sunday. Jericho asks if Austin’s ready. Austin toasts to the champ and knocks the beer out of his hand. Austin says Jericho and his titles and his. Any time.
-Flair is on the phone when the Dudleyz come in. They want to know why they aren’t getting their rematch for the tag titles at No Way Out. Christian and Storm come in and want a title shot as well. Flair makes a Tag Team Turmoil match to determine the number one contenders. At No Way Out, The Dudleyz, Christian and Lance Storm, the APA, Scotty and Albert, Chuck and Billy, and the Hardyz will battle for the number one contendership.
Goldust vs. Tajiri
Goldust comes out first (Anyone else notice a striking resemblence to Norma Desmond from Sunset Boulevard?…well, minus the gold paint and bodysuit). Tajiri and Torrie come out next. Arm drags exchanged by the two. Kick by Tajiri. Clothesline by Goldust. Kick to the ass (seriously) by Tajiri. Tarantula! Tajiri misses a moonsault from the top rope. Torrie distracts Goldust, then slaps him. Kick by Tajiri, 1-2-kickout. Curtain Call by Goldust, 1-2-3.
Here is your winner- Goldust
-After the match, Goldust grabs Torrie. RVD comes out and hits an Enziguiri. Five Star Frog Splash to Goldust.
-Jericho gets ready to come to the ring and sees Austin drinking a beer in the hall.
Chris Jericho vs. Kane
Jericho comes out first, constantly looking behind him for Austin. Kane soon follows. When the pyros hit, Jericho attacks Kane. Jericho dives out of the ring, grabs his titles, and tries to leave. Kane grabs him from inside the ring. Guillotine by Jericho. Missile dropkick by Jericho. Jericho jumps right into a choke, but Jericho battles out. Kane tosses Jericho outside. Kane stops Jericho from leaving. Jericho hits Kane with the belt.
Here is your winner via DQ- Kane
-After the match, Jericho gets ready to leave, but Austin comes out. Austin knocks Jericho back and into the ring. Stunner to Jericho. Austin drinks some beer, and pours the rest on Jericho.
Vince is talking to Hogan on the phone. Taker comes in (notice how Vince and Flair are always on the phone when someone comes in). Taker asks if Vince enjoyed today. It was quiet. It was quiet because there was no Rock. If he shows up at No Way Out, it’ll be quiet for a long time. Triple H and Maven are in for it tonight. Angle comes in and apologizes for knocking Steph over last week. Angle says he’s going to make HHH suffer. He might not make it to No Way Out. Taker tells Steph that they’ll bring back the body part of her choice when they face Triple H. She says, since it’s Valentine’s Day, that she wants his heart.
-We see clips from Smackdown! last week when Taker Tombstoned Rock on the car.
Undertaker and Kurt Angle vs. Maven and Triple H
Taker comes out first. Angle comes out next. Maven soon follows. Triple H comes out last. Taker attacks Maven from behind and tosses him into the steps. Angle and Triple H battle. Taker attacks Trips from behind and tosses him in the ring. Clothesline by Triple H. Back elbow by Taker. Taker misses the elbow drop. Clothesline by Taker. Tag to Angle. Angle takes it to Triple H. Clothesline and choke by Trips. Spinebuster by Triple H, 1-2-Taker breaks it up. Taker tosses Triple H outside. Trips goes into the steps. Maven wakes up and gets in the ring. Spinning heel kick and standing dropkick to Angle. German suplex to Angle, 1-2-kickout. German by Kurt, 1-2-kickout. Tag to Taker. Clothesline to Maven. Maven goes outside, and Taker calls out Trips, so Angle can take it to Maven. Maven is tossed back in the ring, and Taker hits an elbow drop for a two count, as Triple H breaks up the count. Maven gets tossed onto the turnbuckle, face first, and Taker hits a Big Boot, 1-2-Taker lets up. Tag to Angle. Angle misses the moonsault off the top rope. Angle grabs Maven and pulls him away from his corner. Triple H hits Taker and DDTs Angle. Tag to Triple H. Clotheslines to Angle. Running knee strike to Angle. Neckbreaker to Taker. Clothesline to Angle. Taker goes outside. Spear to Angle. Angle gets a facebuster. Pedigree set up on Angle, but Taker hits a big boot. Maven hits a missile dropkick off the top rope on Angle. Taker tosses Maven outside. Last Ride through the table on Maven. Two German suplexes to Triple H. Taker accidently clotheslines Angle to the outside. Facebuster to Taker. Trips sets up the Pedigree, but Angle hits him with the chair.
Here are your winners via DQ- Triple H and Maven
Angle hits Triple H with more chairshots. Angle grabs Trips as Taker gets the chair. Flair comes down and takes the chair away. Big boot to Flair. Taker sets Flair up for the Last Ride when Vince and Steph come down. Vince stops him because he wants Flair to come to No Way Out to see the nWo poison the WWF. As far as Triple H is concerned, Steph is the guest referee in his match against Kurt! Happy Valentine’s Day! Angle hits Triple H with the chair again!
Man of the Night- Maven. Not only is he Hardcore Champion, but he got to play with the big boys in the main event. Congrats to this young guy.
Match of the Night- Taker and Angle vs. Maven and Triple H. Man am I sick of picking main events. We need better matches on Smackdown!
Quotation of the Night- “The old brick in the box of chocolates trick!”- Micheal Cole, re: Billy and Chuck. Yeah, Cole, I used to use that one ALL the time.
Sign of the Night- “HA HA Maven beat Taker”
34-year-old currently living in Syracuse, New York. Long-time fan of the New York Mets, Chicago Bulls, and Minnesota Vikings. An avid fan of professional wrestling and write reviews/articles on the product. Usually focusing on old-school wrestling.