-We’re here in the Pepsi Arena in Albany, New York for Smackdown! No RAW recaps, as we start off right away, learning that Stone Cold Steve Austin and Kurt Angle will face the Rock and Chris Jericho in tonight’s main event!
Rob Van Dam vs. Kane
-RVD comes right out, followed soon by Kane. Right hands by Kane start the match off. Kane goes for the bench press slam, but RVD counters and hits a dropkick. Choke toss by Kane into the turnbuckle. Counter by RVD, who hits a shoulder spear, but Kane hits a clothesline when Rob goes for another. Sidewalk backbreaker by Kane. Kane works on RVD’s back. Bear hug by Kane, who slams RVD back first into the turnbuckle. RVD flips off the top rope, taking Kane out. Spinning heel kick by RVD, followed by the Rolling Thunder. 1-2-kickout. Flapjack by Kane, sending RVD face first into the turnbuckle. Big boot by Kane. Kane goes for the Lariat, but RVD gives him a high kick and knocks him off. RVD goes up top, but Kane counters and hits a superplex. RVD goes for a heel kick, misses. Kane goes for a slam, but RVD counters. RVD goes for another heel kick, misses. Kane sets up the chokeslam, but Booker T distracts him. Martial arts kick off the top rope, 1-2-3!
Here is your winner: Rob Van Dam
-After the match, Undertaker comes down and chases off Booker T. Commercial break.
-Backstage, Test is playing his X-Box when the Dutchess of Dudleyville comes in. She says she’s just checking to make sure he’s ready for the six man tag with the Dudleyz against the Hardyz and Edge. Test says he was born ready. Stacy says he shouldn’t worry, she always thought he was way hotter than Edge.
-Y2J comes into the Rock’s locker room. He remembers how funny it was when he saved Rock last Monday night from the Alliance. He also thought it was funny that a bunch of people thought he was going to hit Rock with the chair instead of rescue him. Jericho is a team player, and he’s going ot watch Rock’s back while leading the WWF to victory at Survivor Series. Rock says “Knock Knock”. “Who’s there?” “The Rock.” “The Rock who?” The Rock who’s going to lead the WWF into vicotry and save Jericho’s job. What a lame joke. I know a much better one about apples and oranges…uh…maybe later. Anyway, until then, they’re on the same page. Is Jericho cool with that? Well, Jericho says he is, but after Survivor Series, he’s going to beat the Rock down and take back his title. They share some “happenin'” handshakes, and Jericho compares his cool factor to that of Fonzie….WHOA. Let’s not get ahead of yourself, here, Y2J. NO ONE is as cool as Fonzie…except maybe James Dean, or Jesse from Full House.
-We see clips from Monday night when Edge won the U.S. Title from Kurt Angle.
Hardy Boyz and Edge vs. Dudley Boyz and Test
-The new U.S. Champion, Test, comes out first, followed by the new WWF Tag Team Champs, the Hardy Boyz. The Dudleyz follow with Stacy…who’s wearing a “Got Wood” tee shirt…uhhh…excuse me for a second. Okay, and we’re back, as Test comes out. Edge and Bubba start off, as they lock up. Shoulder block by Bubba. The counter each others’ mokeytosses, bulldog by Edge. Tag to Matt, and Edge and Matt hit a double back body drop. All six get in the ring. Triple suplex to the Dudleyz. Tag to Test. Clothesline by Test. Test takes it to Matt Hardy in the corner. Tag to D-Von. Spinning elbow to Matt. Russian leg sweep by Matt, who tags Jeff. Clotheslines to D-Von and Test. Low blow to D-Von. Bubba pulls Jeff outside and slams him into the announce table. Jeff is tossed back in, 1-2-kickout. “We want tables” chant. D-Von works on Jeff and tags Bubba. Neckbreaker by Bubba, 1-2-kickout. Back body drop by Bubba. The ref is distracted, and the Dudleyz hit the Wassup headbutt, minues the Wassup. D-Von isolates Jeff and tags Test. Test clotheslines Jeff on both sides of the ring, and tags Bubba. Falling headbutt by Bubba. Bubba goes off the top rope with the move he never hits, and…you guessed it…misses. Double tag to Edge and D-Von. Clotheslines and a back body drop by Edge. Flapjack to Test, catching him on the ropes. Spinning heel kick to Test. Reverse X-Factor to D-Von, 1-2-broken up by Bubba. Poetry in Motion by Jeff and Edge to Bubba. Poetry in Motion by Edge and Matt to Test. Jeff misses the Suicide dive onto Test outside. Stacy gets on the apron, and D-Von almost runs into her. He stops himself, but gets nailed with a spear by Edge, 1-2-3!
Here are your winners: Hardy Boyz and Edge
-After the match, Test nails Edge with the Big Boot. Lita hits Stacy off the apron, but Matt catches her! When Lita yells at him, he drops her like a sack of potatoes. Lita turns around into the 3-D!
-Matt comforts Lita backstage, saying the Dudleyz will never hurt her again.
-Hey, it’s DDP. But, it’s not. It’s Big Show in an atrocious “Ricky Schroeder from his Silver Spoons days” wig. He’s also got some mad fake pearly whites. He spouts off some DDP catchphrases. When the Big Show destroys the Allaince at Survivor Series and DDP loses his job, it won’t be a bad thing, it’ll be a good thing, because we’ll never have to see DDP’s ugly face again. Not one to be called ugly, the REAL DDP stands up and comes on out. Man…they’re like twins. Really unalike twins…and one that got really fat. DDP, of course, is the fat one. DDP assaults Big Show and goes for the Diamond Cutter. Big Show tosses DDP away and hits a clothesline. Chokeslam to DDP, 1-2-3. Wait…was that a match? Well, after the “match”, Shane O’ Mac nails the Big Show with a chair and escapes through the crowd.
-Steph smiles at clips of the birth of the Alliance on the TV, when Paul comes in, telling her about Shane’s accomplishment. She shows him the look on Vince’s face when she told him that she owned ECW. Paul says if she wants to see a look on his face, wait until he calls Vince out…which is going to happen now. Paul goes on quite the tirade until Steph says “Go Get ‘Im, Paul!”.
-Paul makes his way out to thee ring to some seriously hardcore music (if anyone knows who it is, let me know…I dig it). Paul says he’s going to call Vince out to his ring. This is his show and his company…at least until Sunday. He hopes the fans appreciat that he, Steph, and Shane have stoo up against Vince’s tyranny, because the WWF will die on Sunday. It’s not Paul’s fault, he didn’t destroy everything accomplished by Stone Cold Steve Austin. He listened to Mick Foley on Monday Night, and he agreed with everything he said. The WWF actually does suck. Vince doesn’t have it anymore. Everyone has left him. Stone Cold, Mick Foley, even his own children. He has no hope to save the WWF. His chances of saving the WWF are about as good as starting up a football league. No Chance hits, and out comes Vinnie Mac. Paul mock bows and says he was on his knees because Vince is so used to people kissing his ass. That’s all Vince is: a billionaire (yes, that’s right, he’s ONLY a billionaire). Paul’s waited forever to see Vince as he is right now. He’s waited forever to tell him he hates his guyts. Vince is the most disgusting S.O.B. he’s ever seen. He took Hulk Hogan’s blood, Bret Hart’s pride, and Shawn Micheals’ smile and made himself a billionaire. He made himself a billionaire off of everyone else’s hard work. He stole everyone’s ideas. Especially Paul’s. Vince stole Paul’s legacy: ECW. Ha ha ha ha ha…Paul’s bald! Sorry…he just threw his hat down. Chuckle chuckle. Paul says to look at Tazz. He used to be a wrestler. A great wrestler. Now he’s a fat color commentator, and not even a good one at that. Jeez, who did Tazz piss off backstage? He’s totally the role of “Everyone’s bitch” nowadays. “Tazz” chants start up. Vince turned the wrestlers into sports entertainers. He made wrestling into an ugly word. Tazz steps up as Paul promisese that Vince is going down on Sunday. Tazzmission to Heyman! Huge pop as Tazz chokes out Paul Heyman! Vince gets on the mic to say that Paul is the epitome of the Alliance, because on Suday, the Alliance is going to choke.
-We see clips from Monday night when RVD pinned the Undertaker.
Booker T vs. Undertaker
-J.R. replaces Tazz in the commentator booth as the Booker Man comes down to the ring. Undertaker takes Booker out from behind and the two battle outside. Undertaker goes into the barricade. Booker goes into the steel steps, into the barricade, and then into the crowd. Booker gets tossed back over the barricade and onto the announce table. Booker goes into the steel steps…again. Booker goes into the ring, and he and Undertaker battle in the ring. Taker says they’re going to send a message tonight as he picks up a steel chair. The ref grabs the chair, and Taker tosses him out of the way. The DQ bell sounds, and Booker gets the chair. Big boot to Booker. Chokeslam.
Here is your winner: Booker T via Disqualification
-We see clips of WWF superstars on The Weakest Link.
-Ivory is freaking out backstage, and Regal tells her to shut up. Regal tells her there will be a new Women’s Title. At Survivor Series, Ivory, Mighty Molly, Trish, Lita, Jacqui, and a surprise guest will battle in a Six-Pack Challange for the Women’s Title. Ivory freaks out again as mild-mannered reporter Gregory Helms enters to ask a quick question. He asks Regal about the 20 Man Immunity Challange. Regal explains it will be a 20 Man, over the top rope Battle Royal. The winner automatically gets immunity from being fired for one year. Helms claims that you would have to be a superhero to win that match. And he knows just the man for the job. Now, who could that be? Daredevil? I bet it’s Daredevil.
-Austin talks to Angle about getting a Rock Bottom on RAW. Austin tells Angle to look at him. Hilarious “What?” chants by the audience. Austin tells Angle to say that he’s with Austin. Angle does so, but Austin doesn’t believe him. He says that Angle changes with the wind. Angle claims that if anyone switches sides, it’s Austin. Austin claims Angle wants to be a big star by jumping to the WWF. Angle says he’s going to take care of Jericho tonight. Jericho thinks he’s cool, but he’s “Canadian cool, eh”. Angle says he’s not going to jump ship. He’s willing to pinky swear.
-Regal comes to tell Torrie that he’s going to thrash Tajiri, but he wishes her the best. She calls him a pompous ass. He says Tajiri will be out of a job, but he’s sure he can find a “position” for her.
Tajiri and Torrie Wilson vs. William Regal and Ivory
-Tajiri and Torrie come out first, followed by Regal and Ivory, with Regal’s “I’m an evil, devious villian” music in the background. The Alliance members charge the WWF members. Ivory starts against Torrie, choking her on the ropes. Facebuster by Ivory, 1-2-kickout. Two snapmares by Ivory. Hair submission…yes, I did say hair submission…by Ivory. Legdrop by Ivory, 1-2-kickout. Handspring elbow by Torrie. Double tag. Kick to Regal, followed by the handspring elbow. 1-2-kickout. Kick to Regal. Tarantula! Green Mist to Ivory, but Regal hits Tajiri from behind. Regal tosses Tajiri on the ropes and brings Torrie into the ring. Double arm powerbomb to Torrie! Regal Stretch to Torrie. The ref sounds the DQ bell.
Here are your winners: Tajiri and Torrie Wilson via Disqualification
-J.R. wishes goodbye if he won’t be working here after Survivor Series. We see Survivor Series video package. Winner take all!
-Howard Finkel asks for a moment of Vince’s time to say that he’s sure that the WWF will prevail, but he wants to thank Vince for a great twenty years. He gives Vince a big hug. Vince says that the WWF will succeed…but tells Howard never to touch him again.
-We see Austin and Angle coming to the ring.
Chris Jericho and the Rock vs. Kurt Angle and Stone Cold Steve Austin
-Jericho comes down, followed by the Rock. Angle soon follows, and finally Stone Cold enters. Stone Cold rushes the Rock and takes it to him. Swinging neckbreaker and a clothesline by Rock. Austin battles out of the Rock Bottom. Rock pushes Austin when he goes for the Stunner and he hits a clothesline. Lou Thesz Press. Double Axe Handle, 1-2-kickout. Austin works on Rock’s shoulder, but Rock battles back. Blind tag to Angle, but Rock sees it. Clothesline to Austin, and Rock brings Angle in the hard way. Samoan drop to Angle and a tag to Jericho. Chops to Angle and a flying forearm. Missile dropkick to Angle. 1-2-kickout. Running knee to the gut of Jericho. Tag to Austin. Austin and Jericho trade blows. Flying cross body into the lateral press, 1-2-kickout. Austin tosses Jericho outside, but Jericho lands on the apron. Double axe handle off the top rope, 1-2-kickout. Rock and Jericho trade shots on Austin. Tag to Angle. Jericho misses the bulldog, counters the Angle Slam and goes for the Walls ofJericho. Austin comes after Jericho. Springboard dropkick to Austin. German suplex to Jericho. Tag to Austin. Spinebuster to Jericho, 1-2-kickout. Another cover, another two count. Choke on the rope, and Angle gets some shots in from the outside. Small package by Jericho, but Austin kicks out after two. Austin goes for the Lou Thesz Press, but Jericho counters into the Walls of Jericho. Angle breaks up the hold. Tag to Angle. Clothesline by Angle, 1-2-kickout. Sleeper on Jericho, who battles out. Jericho rolls up Angle, but Angle counters, and Jericho counters the counter into the Anglelock! Angle wriggles out and hits an overhead belly to belly. 1-2-kickout. Tag to Austin. Austin sets Jericho up for the Superplex, but Jericho tosses him off and hits a missile dropkick. Austin tries to stop the tag, but Jericho hits him with the Enziguiri. Austin goes for the back suplex, but Jericho flips over and hits the Breakdown. Double tag. Flying forearm to Angle, followed by a DDT. Smackdown laid on Austin. Rock tosses Angle over the top rope. Spinebuster to Austin. Sharpshooter on Austin, but Angle breaks up the hold and locks the Anglelock on Rock. Jericho breaks it up and tosses Angle outside. Angle hits an overhead belly to belly on Jericho outside. Angle and Austin doubleteam Rock and work on his ankle. Austin gets the chair and hits Rock’s ankle, and the ref calls for the bell.
Here are your winners: Chris Jericho and the Rock
Austin puts the chair on Rock’s ankle and goes up top . Undertaker comes down and hits a Chokeslam. Booker T hits Taker with a kick, and Angle hits him with an Angle Slam. Jericho tosses Angle out and hits a bulldog and Lionsault on Booker T. RVD hits a heel kick and Five Star Frog Splash on Jericho. Kane hits a Chokeslam on RVD! Chairshot by Shane to Kane! Big Show nails the chair into Shane’s face! Angle Slam to Big Show! Rock Bottom to Angle! Stunner to Rock! Vince comes out and smiles at Austin, who smiles back!
Match of the Night: Rock and Jericho vs. Austin and Angle. Most of the matches were about five seconds long, except this one and the six man tag. This one was a pretty good match. Pretty crappy finisher-fest of a finish, but the match was still pretty darn good.
Man of the Night: Edge. Just cause I like Edge. He’s the new U.S. Champ, he deserves to move up in the WWF, I say! So I say, so shall it be!
Quotation of the Night: “Whassupwitdat? Excuse me, what IS up with that?” -Mild Mannered reporter, Gregory Helms.
Sign of the Night: Paul Heyman Needs Stacker 2
31-year old currently living in Syracuse, New York. Longtime fan of the New York Mets, Chicago Bulls and Minnesota Vikings. Avid fan of professional wrestling and write reviews/articles on the product. Usually focusing on the old school wrestling.