We start with a clip from last Monday night, where the Undertaker and Kurt Angle are taking on Stone Cold Steve Austin and Booker T. Both Austin and Angle are down, and RVD comes down! Who’s RVD gonna hit? He nails Angle with the Five Star Frog Splash, and Austin gets the three count! We’re at ringside with Micheal Cole and Paul Heyman in the Molson Center in Montreal. We find out RVD will take on Kurt Angle tonight, and The Brothers of Destruction will take on the former WCW Tag Team Champions, Booker T and Test!
Chris Jericho Interview
-It’s time to break the walls down, as Chris Jericho comes down, with Y2J chants starting up. He says that he’s been hearing some unflattering things about him from the back: that he’s a choke artist, he’s not a big time player, and he can’t win “the big one”. They’re right. He’s never officially won the WWF Title. He never even had a WCW title shot when he was in WCW. Now he has a chance to prove them wrong and tell them to kiss his ass! Steph comes out, mocking Y2J’s entrance. She asks him to please shut the hell up. Slut chants start right up. She says to wait, she has another one. “Smackdown is Stephanie”! She says it’s fun to interrupt, like he does, over and over. He must like repetition, because he consistently loses the big matches. She decided to pick the lesser of two evils to root for this Sunday. She hopes the Rock cleans his clock and knows that the Rock would publically appreciate her support. Well, he’ll get the chance, because finally, the Rock has come back to Montreal! Rock thinks steph looks quite…gigantic. If she thinks for one second that he wants…Steph stops him, and tells him he shouldn’t be mad at her. He should be mad at Chris Jericho, the man who stood at ringside while RVD and Rhyno beat the Rock down. She says Jericho has been opposed to the Rock since day one. She proves it by showing a clip of Y2J’s debut from two years ago. She says Y2J has wanted to be the Rock and will screw the Rock over the first chance he gets. Rock appreciates her concern, because if anyone knows anything about screwing, it’s her. Jericho says she should support him, because you can’t spell Jericho without “H-O”. Rock says her wants her support. He would be unstoppable if he had half the support her bra provides. Jericho starts a new insult, and Steph wiggs out and runs to the back. Jericho asks if Rock has anything to say to him, specifically about giving him the Rock Bottom on Monday. Rock says that Jericho was supposed to stay in the back, like always, he failed. Y2J says he was helping him, not getting in the way. He was saving the Rock’s title. Rock says that later on Monday, he saved Jericho’s ass. Jericho says he should worry about his own ass this Sunday. Rock wonders why. He shouldn’t be worried. There’s a reason people talk about Jericho: He’s just not that good. Jericho promises that this Sunday he will…Rock cuts him off, saying that his never, ever catchphrase is so…Jericho cuts him off with a hand in his face! Y2J gives Rock the Just Bring It gesture, and Rock brings it with a Rock Bottom!
The Alliance has a celebration ready in the back as Austin walks in. They have to wait for RVD. RVD proved last Monday night that he’s on Austin’s and the Alliance’s side, so they’ll have to celebrate with him. Tazz points out that RVD might hit the Frog Splash on Angle and win the title. The Alliance groans, and Austin kicks Tazz out, calling him a party pooper. The Alliance boos, then chants RVD, as the crowd joins in.
We see Hurricane and the Hurricycle put the APA out of business from last Monday night on RAW.
A limo arrives. Is it RVD?
Hurricane, Lance Storm, and Mighty Molly vs. The Hardy Boyz and Lita
-Stand back! There’s a Hurricane coming through! Superheroic music erupts, and out come Hurricane, Mighty Molly, and Lance Storm with Ivory. Next come the Hardy Boyz and Lita, as we’re set for a six man tag team match. Jeff and Storm start off. Lockup, armwrenches, and Jeff hits a headscissors takedown off the turnbuckle. Low blow by Jeff, who then tags Matt. Poetry in Motion to Storm. Matt slams Storm into the turnbuckle, then hits a Russian leg drop. Tag to Hurricane, double team by Storm and Hurricane. Suplex by Hurricane, who misses the legdrop. Matt goes for the sunset flip, but Hurricane counters. Matt goes for the pin, 1-2-kickout. Snapmare by Hurricane, as Molly hits a neckwrench on Matt. Backbreaker by Hurricane, followed by a neckbreaker. Cover, broken by Jeff. Clothesline by Storm on Matt. Jeff takes Storm out outside. Neckbreaker by Matt, tag to Lita as Hurricane tags Molly. Matt and Hurricane go outside as Lita and Molly go at it. Scoop slam by Lita as Storm and Hurricane come in and set Lita up for a double suplex. The Hardyz bring her down and they triple suplex Storm and Hurricane. Lita tags Jeff and goes for the Twist of Fate on Hurricane. Ivory takes Lita and Jeff down, and Hurricane hits the Eye of the Hurricane, 1-2-3!
Here are your winners: Hurricane, Mighty Molly, and Lance Storm!
The APA look at the Hurricycle and decide that they don’t want to take a plane to No Mercy. They hop in the Hurricycle an ride off!
The Alliance celebrates. Austin tells the Alliance about an Olympic gold medalist who was successful in the WWF, but got his ass whooped by Stone Cold. Stone Cold has Angle’s number, and on Sunday, with RVD’s help, he’s going to whoop Angle’s ass again. Steph comes in and says William Regal has an announcement. Regal officially announces Christian as the newest Alliance superstar. Christian is glad to be in a group that appreciates champions. Austin says when he reaches up and becomes a big star, he’ll get his own celebration.
Who is in that limo? And why are they still in there? There must be a TV in there or something.
Tazz vs. Maven
-Tazz comes out, ready to take on Maven. Again. Out come the two Tough Enough winners, Maven and Nidia. Tazz wastes no time taking out Maven. Big back body drop, kicks, and chops to Maven. Clothesline by Tazz, who gets a two count on Maven, after stopping the count himself. Let’s go Maven chants. T-Bone suplex, belly to belly suplex, and another T-Bone suplex by Tazz. Tazz covers, but Nidia pulls him off! Tazz stares down Nidia, and Maven capitalizes, rolling Tazz up in a small package and gets the three count!
Here is your winner: Maven
We see clips of Angle promoting his book.
We see the limo, and RVD steps out. He talks to someone in the limo, saying he enjoyed the meeting. So, it’s either Vince or a hooker. Maybe both…ewwww.
We see clips from Monday as Jericho says he can beat Rcok. Rock tells Jericho to stay out of his way. Jericho stops RVD from hitting the Five Star Frog Splash on Rock, but doesn’t help Rock while being beaten down by RVD and Rhyno. Rock later saves Jericho from the Alliance. Lillian talks to Foley and asks him why he put Rock and Y2J in a tag match together. Foley says it’s simple psychology: he’s going to nip this fussin’ and a-feudin’ in the bud. Remember when Foley and Rock became the most entertaining tag team in the WWF? Foley says the Dudleyz will face the Big Show and Tajiri for the WWF Tag Team Championship on Sunday at No Mercy! And that is final…but he needs to get his gavel back. Test and Booker T leave the party as Rob Van Dam enters, wondering what all the hubbub is about. Austin is proud of RVD for helping him. Austin wants RVD to take Angle out. Austin gives RVD his watch, as the Alliance “oohs” and “aahs”. The watch is saying “It’s time for RVD to be a big star!”
We see that the limo is still there. Who’s still in there? Vince? Hooker? Inquiring fans want to know.
Undertaker and Kane vs. Test and Booker T
-We’re rollin’, and here come the Brothers of Destruction. Time to take the Test, and then Booker T follows him. The Brothers take the fight to the Book and Test outside, and Booker T takes it to Kane inside. Tag to Test. Double clothesline by Kane. 2 count. Tag to Undertaker. Elbows to Test, and Test elbows back, and hits a clothesline. Tag to the Booker Man. Double clothesline by Test and the Book. Clothesline by Taker on Book. Armwreanch by Taker, then he lifts Booker up by the arn! Old skool tightrope walk. Cover, but Test breaks up the count. Tag to Kane. Slam to Book, and Kane misses the legdrop. Heel kick to Kane, tag to Test. Kane gets right up and hits a big boot on Test. Powerslam to Test, followed by a Sidewalk slam. Kane goes for the Lariat, but Test clotheslines him in mid-air! Tag to Booker. Arm wrench and heel kick to Kane. Taker breaks up the three count. Test comes in without a tag, and they double team Kane. Test gous up top, but Taker knocks his legs out. Kane his a funky looking superplex. Double tag, as Undertaker cleans house with clotheslines. Sidewalk slam to Booker. DDT to the Booker Man. Taker calls for a chokeslam, but Test clotheslines him. Kane takes Test outside. Test takes it to Knae outside, as Booker kicks Kane in the ring. Chokeslam to Booker T, but Test breaks up the three count. Test misses the big boot and gets chokeslammed. Booker comes in with the chair and gets a big boot from Taker. Taker goes for the Last Ride, but Test nails the big boot. Booker gets the 1-2-3!
Here are your winners: Test and Booker T
That limo is still there, and Vinnie Mac comes right out of it! I hope he wasn’t the hooker. Yes, I’m convinced there was a hooker.
Austin is not pleased, nor is the Alliance. Austin yells at RVD from being in a car with Vince. RVD says they were just talking. Vince was telling him what Austin was always telling him: that he could be a big star. Austin says that Vince is the Devil. RVD says Vince will see him this Sunday. Austin wants his watch back. Quoth the watch: “It’s time for RVD to make a decision”. RVD is either with Austin or against him.
We see a clip from Monday where Tajiri gives Bubba Ray Dudley the Green Mist, and Big Show chokeslams him through a table!
D-Von Dudley vs. Tajiri
-The Dudleyz come out with Hotty Dudley, Stacy Keibler. Tajiri comes out with Big Show covering his back. D-Von takes it to Tajiri with punches and chops. Kick by Tajiri, followed by a missile dropkick. 2 count. Hurricanrana and spinning heel kick by Tajiri. Bubba tosses Tajiri off the apron into the barricade. Big Show chases Bubba off, as he hides behind Stacy. Scoop slam and legdrop by D-Von. Bubba takes it to Tajiri outside again. Scoop slam by D-Von, who misses the flying headbutt. Chops by Tajiri and a big kick. Handspring elbow by Tajiri. Sliding dropkick to D-Von. D-Von charges and Tajiri locks in the Tarantula. Tajiri goes for the kick of death, misses, and Stacy distracts the ref as the Dudleyz hit the 3D! Big Show chokeslams D-Von! Tajiri rolls over and gets the three count!
Here is your winner: Tajiri
After the match, Big Show carries off Tajiri, but Bubba knocks Big Show down, as Torrie comes out after Stacy! Torrie pulls down Stacy’s pants and goes back to the ramp with Tajiri and Big Show!
Linda gives a one million dollar check to big Rudy Guiliani.
Jericho gets ready for the match, as does Rocky.
Shane is pissed about his dad being there. He’s quite vexed. Regal says he’s taken his dad out before, he can do it again.
Chris Jericho and the Rock vs. Raven and Justin Credible
-Y2J comes out, followed by the Rock. Raven and Justin Credible soon follow, with Terri in tow. The ref tries to separate Rock and Jericho, but is unsuccessful, as Rock and Y2J go at it right there in the ring! Raven tosses Jericho out of the ring, and he and Justin Credible double team Rock! Jericho comes in with a chair. Chairshot to Raven. Chairshot to Justin Credible. And one big ole chairshot to the Rock! Y2J kicks Rock’s arm, goes to the ropes, and drops the People’s Elbow!
Here is your winner: Absolutely nobody.
Clips from last Monday, as Christian sets up Edge with a tip about his mother to ambush him with the Alliance.
Coach talks to Edge. Edge says he’s been thinking, and he no longer feels guilty about beating the hell out of his little brother. He no longer has a brother. Christian is about to have an accident of his own tonight. Edge looks for Christian, and in comes some Alliance superstars, followed by Christian. Christian says Edge is accident prone, and wants him to meet his new family. Hugh Morrus and Kanyon hold Edge down as Christian takes him out.
We see a clip from Monday night when RVD Frog Splashes Kurt Angle.
Rob Van Dam vs. Kurt Angle
-RVD comes out, followed by Kurt Angle. Spear by Angle, followed by a belly to back suplex. Angle takes it to RVD outside. RVD tosses Angle into the steps. RVD front suplexes Angle onto the barricade. RVD goes on the apron, but Angle tosses RVD off onto the barricade. Angle takes it to RVD inside, but RVD hits a crossbody onto Angle. German suplex by Angle. Angle goes for the Olympic Slam, but RVD reverses it, goes for a heel kick, but Angle counters, getting him into the Anglelock. RVD battles out of the Anglelock and hits a heel kick. Springboard martial arts kick by RVD. Rolling thunder by RVD. Cover, and Angle reverses it into a school boy, 1-2-kickout. Choke on the turnbuckle by RVD. Angle battles back. Shoulder spears by RVD, but Angle counters, and RVD gives him a big kick to the face. 2 count. RVD gets a sleeper on Angle, who battles out. Flying crossbody into a lateral press by Angle, 1-2-kickout. Angle hits two belly to belly suplexes. Olympic Slam by Angle. The straps come down, and Angle locks in the Anglelock, but Austin breaks it up! Stunner to Angle! Austin tosses RVD out of the ring! Austin goes for another stunner, but Angle counters and hits an Olympic Slam! RVD goes up top, but who’s he going to hit? Five Star Frog Splash to Austin! Vince comes out as RVD exits, and Vince points the thumbs.
Here is your winner: Nobody!
Awards of the night…
Man of the night: Christian. He’s ready for his very own celebration party, and is the newest Alliance member. He also gets one up on his brother, Edge, going into the big ladder match this Sunday! All hail Christian!
Match of the Night: The Brothers of Destruction vs. Booker T and Test. Just because I’m sick of picking RVD matches. So here’s something different. Plus a clean job by Taker is a-okay with me.
Quotation of the night: “Wouldn’t you hide behind Stacy? She’s…tall.”